Ask-a-gg

[ReineD]

To Brittany CD: what Di said in #435, plus try to have an open mind and be willing to expand personal definitions of what is masculine and feminine.

As to feeling a thrill whether wearing my father's or brother's things, or wearing a beautifully special women's outfit (prom, wedding, cocktail dress, etc), nope it never happened for me. It didn't dawn on me to put on specifically my father's or brother's things, except perhaps a larger old discarded shirt to put over my clothes when painting, like a smock. I did have an outfit in the eighties with a shirt and tie, but it was decidedly feminine. The shirt was very form fitting - it revealed my curves, and the tie was a cute bright red silk number, that matched other red accessories I was wearing. I wore the whole thing with pale, very tight blue jeans.

As to feeling good about a prom or cocktail dress, I do like the way that some clothes look on me and I know that in our society women (and men) who have good figures and who dress well catch other people's eye since they stand out from the hordes of casually dressed people. And I do enjoy presenting an attractive image. But I can honestly say that I've never felt any thrill about looking my best. In my younger years I knew that certain outfits attracted men's glances (short skirt, plunging necklines, high heels, etc) and I did feel fulfilled as a woman knowing that I was attractive to the opposite sex. I take it this feeling is rather basic to our natures since after all we are fundamentally here to propagate our species. But if I had been in an exclusively all-female environment dressed this way I would not have felt the same degree of fulfillment, since I would know that other women would not look at me with the same appreciative eyes as men, except perhaps lesbians whom I had no interest in attracting. So this proves to me that what I wear has no effect on my well-being if I am alone no matter what it is, but knowing how others perceive me does have an affect.