And remembering the good times and those who truly know us and Love us explains why we have the ongoing debate about telling/ not telling our spouses/SOs how?
It's easy to toss that platitude out there and say I'd love her anyways. But the truth of the matter is; at the time of our passing, if our spouse or SO doesn't know, and they clean house, what they find will more than likely be shocking, unless they had sneaking suspicions for years. If we hope to ease their minds or the shock, we owe them some sort of explanation in our passing if we cannot muster an explanation in life. You make the very brash assumption that because they know us and Love us, they'll be okay. That's partly the problem; once they find your stash, they will think they knew us or rather, they will second guess what they knew. And if they second guess hard enough, they may second guess the Love we had for them, or worse the Love they thought they had for us. Hell, they may question our Love for them simply because they feel we did not think them worthy of telling them. That's not the legacy anybody wants to leave in their wake.
As I said earlier, the great debate rages on about tell/don't tell, because the end result is people question the very points you tried to make; and that's while we are alive to point out the fallacy in their thinking. But it doesn't mean they will believe us even then. There is no guarantee that in our passing, but maybe the last written words of a dead man will carry enough weight to make them rethink their doubts or ease the double grief they will undoubtedly be feeling upon discovering our long held secrets.
