80 percent ain't bad. Three things you need to do: 1) talk to her about the importance her acceptance has on how you feel about yourself, 2) accept the present situation may only change slowly if at all, and seek some other form of accommodation, such as attending meetings of a local TG group as an alternative means of support, and 3) be patient, understanding and kind. You're asking something from her that, at least for her, is very difficult to give. Imagine if she were to expect you to give up this part of yourself entirely. Many an SO has done just that. By comparison she has shown you patience, understanding and kindness. Reciprocate.
