just trying to relax

[Allisa]

It's been awhile since anyone has heckled me in public but this afternoon was different. After getting home from work and cleaning up I donned a pair of skinny jeans and a V neck ladies T shirt and my flat heeled scrunch booties. I ordered my usual Friday night pizza(extra cheese,1/2 sausage,1/2 black olives) well after arriving at the pizzeria I forgot my sunglasses(large womens) were on top of my head and in I strode, as soon as I entered I heard comments about Peter Pan wanna' be, maybe wanting to apply for waitress position and so on. Now all this time had a 2 day chin growth, no make-up just my usual jewelry(bangles and small hoop earrings).Well not wanting to be confrontational and just go home and relax with my pizza, I let the near 300 lb. idiots (most weight around the middle not between the ears) off the hook and left to only be waiting at a traffic light in the right lane when a truck with crew cab pulls next to me with it's windows open(mine too) and three young girls(teens) with their father pulls next to me, now I hear in no uncertain terms that they recognize my gender and the giggles and declaration to their father that there's a guy with long hair, jewelry,girls top and long colored nails next to him and don't let him beat you out of the light and stay next to him, I'm thinking just to heckle me on the way, but the father lets me get ahead and falls behind maybe thinking he could get in trouble if I turn them in for what ever reason or maybe he just didn't care one way or another. Just goes to show the one time I leave the house without my more femme face and attitude I get noticed. Well I got my pizza and now a skirt on and settling in for a night of uneventful T.V. watching, hope there's a fashion show on one of the shopping networks. Tomorrow feels like a femme day out with chores and an all around out and about day. Some times the bear gets you, such is life.Well good night all and thanks for your reading.

[Suzie Petersen]

Allisa,

Enjoy your Pizza and whatever entertainment you can find on the tube.

People suck, and it dont mean a thing. Simple as that.

Hugs
Suzie

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Lisa, $#!+ happens sometimes, You just can't fix stupid.


Here's a DOZEN hugs to go with the pizza,

[Victoria Demeanor]

Yup there are a bunch of morons out there and we are always bond to run into them. I do find it funny that the guy at the pizza parlor, best insult was peter pan. Personally I would have taken that as a compliment and thanked him. Not because I would take it as a compliment, but because I know it would have pissed him off. I am so glad that you took it in stride and didn't let it ruin your night.
Oh and I'll take a slice from the 1/2 sausage please.

ne dimittatis eos descendite

[Jenniferathome]

Allisa, there's no accounting for idiots and ignorance. Some morons are looking to heckle someone. It's sad but it's life. I think it is always better to respond in some way. Not to pick a fight nor even standing up for the rights of weirdos. In the pizza place, a simple, "No, I have a job just getting a pizza like you." It's non-confrontational and says to the idiots you're a person too. A smile and a hello can be very disarming.

Hang tough and keep at it.

[TrishaLake]

I might decide to use a different pizzeria and that would be the best way to punish them. On another note F em.....most people have so many issues they have to lash out at others...

[ashleyjane15]

I'm going to quote Terry Goodkind on this one: Wizard's First Rule: People are stupid.
Personally, My defense mechanism for criticism and heckling is sarcasm. Granted it might not have helped the situation but that's just me. You handled the situation the best way possible. Sometimes I wish I had that kind of restraint.
Go ahead and treat yourself. You've earned it. Find something good on TV and relax.

[CynthiaD]

Don't let derisive comments from others get you down. Here's something I learned a long time ago.

If you want everyone to hate you, start your own business. Work hard. Become successful. Hire lots of people, and pay them good wages. Everyone will hate you for your success.

If you want everyone to love you, become the town drunk.

I've seen this happen more than once. If people make snide comments, just remember that you're not the one making fun of someone just for being herself. So who has the high ground here?

[Pat]

I remember a long time ago a teacher told me "There's always someone who feels the need to shout out 'Hey! That slide's upside down!' even though the whole auditorium can see it for themselves." I feel the same way whenever someone "discovers my secret" when I'm out and about. My sense of it is that we are all, in turn, entertainment for the folks around us. When it's my turn, I try to smile and be gracious -- their turn is coming up soon enough.

[Ally 2112]

Some people just need to put others down it just makes them feel better about themselves and their low self esteem

[Tammy Lynn Tx]

Today I went to wallys ang got some womens socks (2 extra pair for 2$ less) a bra and a couple pairs of panties. I was in the bra section for about 5 minutes trying to find my size, when I turned around a lady was standing there with a wtf look staring at me. I smiled and put my finger to my lips and said " shhh don't tell my wife they're for her. The lady giggled and agreed not to and started talking like we were ling lost friends.

[Marcelle]

Hi Alissa,

Sorry to hear about your mishap. Don't sweat it, some people just need to make themselves feel superior to others to justify their own pathetic existence. You weathered it well though and I hope you enjoyed every bit of that pizza.

Cheers

Isha

[Allisa]

Well after yesterdays negativity I started today in femme mindset so after an early morning bath and dressing, my make-up went on so smoothly and effortlessly and my hair even co-operated and held a style, I decided to go out for breakfast at a local diner(it's a Jersey thing)than off to buy some necessities for mom(small T.V. and clock), wandering around the big name electronics store drew some attention from SA's who used the proper pronouns, finally purchased what I needed and even got some physical help with the heavy boxes into the cart and out to my truck. I don't know what he thought when he saw the hard hat and other PPE in the cab but I paid no mind to it. Once back home I needed to change my outfit because now I was just going to do basic shopping chores and didn't want to be somewhat over dressed, but somehow seemed more dressed than most women in store(all in jeans and tops, etc..)and I in a skirt and blouse with wedge heels and more make-up than most women, for obvious reasons. Well by now the neighbor is mowing his lawn and many others out mulling around their yards and such, so out I go to my truck in plain view my 38 C girls just proudly protruding and my skirt waving in the breeze off I go on my way. Every thing working properly, no blue tint, no profuse sweating, even the girls are staying put with the glue(normally sweat loosens them) I feel so natural and at ease a large smile and an air of confidence abounds. Just a few years ago I was so in denial of just wearing womens clothes and now I relish my CDing and my duality, this site with it's members have been an enormous eye opening experience and so helpful in my acceptance of myself. I went back and read some of my old threads, what a jerk and so confused I hope never to meet him again. Who knows where and how far this journey of mine will go but I'm having fun getting there now.

[heatherdress]

Allisa - I am also sorry you had these experiences. I think you handled them very well. We are all different and also respond differently. Some of us might be confrontational, some friendly, some ignore and some leave. There is no single best response for morons. What is more important is to not let some jerks who makes a stupid remarks ruin our night. They might have made remarks which were inappropriate, embarrassing or insulting - but you are probably wasting your time if you engage, or acknowledge. And you might subject yourself to more negativity? We probably cannot change the behavior of your 300 pound pizza jerks or teenage girls in a truck. Experiences with people like them are the ones we all fear but must be prepared for and handled, as you did. I am glad you are not letting them diminish your self-acceptance, confidence and joy.

[pamela7]

as others have replied, "you can't fix stupid", what you can do is be so confident and clear in yourself no-one even thinks to question you.

[Angie G]

Some people just need to show there IQ. So one can see how smart they are. So just be you hun.
Angie