Kew hit it exactly for me, Gender is a continium, not a spectrum!!
We each are in our place on that continum, sadly (western) society is intolerant if you're not at the opposite extremes so we perhaps tend to seperate our outside persona from that which is inside, at least in our interactions with society.
When we're here though, I feel we see people as they really are, friends with unique understanding of much of what the others feel.
Love
Fiona