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Thread: What is the attraction to being out in public

  1. #26
    Stand-up Comedian En Fem❤ Alice_2014_B's Avatar
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    It is an adrenaline rush, for one.
    It's the thought of only you know.
    I love walking in heels and trying on heels in stores; going out in public en femme affords me both.
    I've never been out just under-dressed.
    Melissa: "... and why are you dressed as a woman?"
    Coach McGuirk: "Because it's freeing."

    -Home Movies
    (cartoon series)

    Shoe size: 9 US women's.
    Dress size: M to L; 8-10.
    Height: 5' 6".

  2. #27
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    For me, going out in public as a woman seemed to be the next natural step. In some ways it was a means of verifying that I was doing a good job of presenting as a woman. At first it was both scary and exciting. It is hard to explain to others how exciting it was to be out in public hearing my heels click and feeling the breeze blowing my skirt.

    I have been out thousands of times to a great number of venues. One of the things that I enjoy most is being treated as a woman. Yes it is true, I am treated differently when I am presenting as a woman and I love it! This is in addition to the fact that women's clothes, jewelry, makeup etc. are much more fun to wear than men's.
    Hugs, Carole

  3. #28
    Texas gal sherri's Avatar
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    While I definitely identify as a CDer (as opposed to a TS), the fem part of me is very real and expressing feels very natural -- I guess you could say it clicked the instant I first put on a skirt, and I knew immediately that I would be going out as a feminized person. Why? Well, cuz:
    • Hanging out at home when dressed is nice, but it's not enough -- not boring exactly, just not fulfilling enough.
    • I want to experience more of life as a fem person. Even ordinary things take on a freshness and new perspective.
    • I want to interact with other people as a fem person. This is my favorite part, the most expressive not only of this side of me, but of who I am at my core.
    • I'm always hopeful of cultivating friendship and romance.

  4. #29
    Junior Member jaerina96's Avatar
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    I guess the short answer is because I get lonely; the whole "all dressed up with nowhere to go" problem. I feel kind of trapped dressing in private and having to undo myself to go out of the house, it helps to be around other people.

  5. #30
    Member Scarlett Viktoria's Avatar
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    I think for me it is that I just get so excited and so happy I want to share it with others. Keep in mind I've only been out a couple of times. But I feel like for some it just completes that circle of dressing and acting like a woman to be able to do it front of others. Also, for so many, it's such a normal, everyday part of their lives they want to (and they should) be able to just express themselves in their own normal ways and be acceted like any other male/female.

  6. #31
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    I do not know the why of going out totally dressed, but I can say it is more than just the clothing for me. I only crossdress now if I can totally transform with wig, make up, perfume and a beautiful outfit. When I have transformed, I want to go out. I love to blend in with the mainstream dressed as a woman. I am successful male but I love to be girly.
    Love, Sabrina

  7. #32
    TrueNorth Strong & Fierce Princess Chantal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JamieTG View Post
    Whatever the level of our dressing, I think at some point each one of us wants to be out in public as our true, authentic selves.
    Not really, my true authentic self is not wearing a wig, make up, breast forms, and women clothing. Crossdressing is a fun and socializing activity for me, not a presentation of an inner female identity.

  8. #33
    Aspiring Member
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    For once, I feel I have something in common with others here. Like the OP, I am happy being male. I have been out dressed hundreds of times but it has tailed off - been there, done it, though I now spend almost all me free time in skirts and dresses.

    There is undoubtedly a delicious thrill to feeling the breeze on your legs and hearing the clicking of heels on the pavement, but my main pleasure is feedback on my outfit - and all the women who give me this feedback know I am male. I am passable at a distance as I have a good figure and legs and know how to walk so there is a certain frisson at being a good actor. I am not a man who thinks of himself as a woman - I am a gender tourist, nothing more.

  9. #34
    Platinum Member
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    Under dressing does absolutely nothing for me.

    I enjoy going for an evening stroll to allow a cool breeze to caress my legs as the breeze plays with the skirt of my dress and my slip. I have no desire to interact with the masses. It's a private affair for me. It's just taking the experience to a higher level. I'm really comfortable being en femme at home because once I am dressed I end up doing all the domestic chores, meal preparation, baking, etc. A woman's work is really never done.

  10. #35
    Platinum Member Eryn's Avatar
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    For me, being dressed and not going out would be like having a Maserati in the garage that I can never drive. A huge part of my identity and development has been in interaction with others in the real world.

    I only dressed fully in a couple of "trial runs" before my first outing. After that, if I got dressed, I went out.

  11. #36
    Silver Member Kandi Robbins's Avatar
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    Every single one of us does this in different ways, to varying degrees and all for very different reasons. You do what makes you happy, not what you feels you "need to do". For me, I also do not identify in anyway as a woman, but I love being accepted as one by other women. Dressing at home, for me, is empty and very unsatisfying. By getting out there and being completely open and honest with those I meet, I have made a significant number of GG friends who all just accept me as their friend, Kandi. That interpersonal connection is what has turned my CDing from a miserable compulsion into a joyful experience which I look forward to each and every time I do so. There is nothing like trading that smile of recognition with many of the friends I have made.
    Visit Kandi's Land (http://www.kandis-land.com/) daily! Nothing but positive and uplifting posts!
    Pictures and stories of every time out: https://www.flickr.com/photos/131254150@N06/.

  12. #37
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    I really enjoy creating the female form. Dressing for me involves padding, corset, contouring makeup, etc. I do not feel feminine or want to be a woman. It is more like a real time art project or performance art for me. These clothes is not very comfortable for just lounging around the house, so if I dress for home, I would end up just taking it all off. Even doing something mundane, like going to the movies or shopping does not have much appeal for me. It is probably easier to do these things dressed in boring clothes.

    I started going out about 7 years ago. At first it was exciting and had electric feeling. Stepping out the door. A short walk in the dark. The first gay bar... finally walking out in daylight with the general public. It is no longer electric for me but I really enjoy it. I go out to bars and clubs mostly. Many people chat me up, mostly women. The conversations can be really interesting. Examples, a woman moving to New York for work, a young man studying my field in college and what to do with the degree, Rolling Stones vs. Beatles. Sometimes bizarre, a beautiful 40 year old woman, married, with a boyfriend, and girlfriend. Sometimes annoying: the "tranny chaser". It is always fun and interesting.

  13. #38
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    r@s:

    I've never put much effort into thinking about why, if you dress, going out seems to be such a natural extension. It's a question similar to why we dress in the first place. I don't invest any effort in that either. In either case, I doubt if it would change what I do.

    However, there is something that I noticed. When you go out dressed, you get to experience the world from a different perspective; from a female's perspective. Not saying that everything matches 100%, but it is a unique opportunity to see things from the other side. It could be directly from an experience or wondering how a situation may be different from a female perspective. It might turn out to be an interesting education.

    DeeAnn

  14. #39
    Aspiring Member Samantha981's Avatar
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    Like DeeAnn, I have not thought about why before. For me, when I started moving from just lingerie and lipstick to outer clothing and full makeup I just had the interest to be out and be seen. Maybe due to how much time I was putting into it, it seemed a waste to take it all off after a while. Also a sense of "well, I did this, what is next?" and pushing the next extreme. Going out is an extreme! and maybe validation... can I put together an outfit and makeup that is seemingly can transform my appearance? Initially thinking of that as passing... as I have learned more both by interactions with people and from others here... I don't pass, very few probably do when close to someone like when in a conversation. Suppose there is a sense of excitement or adventure, feel that most when out but not when planning or getting ready. Do get bored walking in heels at home - walking for a few hours at a mall is different and more of a experience what like to be a woman for longer periods of time. but the blisters, ouch! I also try to work on more feminine behaviors, like how I sit, or hold/position my hands. But not over the top. Seems senseless to do learn those just to be home, but that is just me. And then it is fun in some little ways. like when making a purchase, getting out my purse and getting the money from there rather than pulling out my wallet, not a big thing but makes the overall experience satisfying.
    So lots of little reasons. Once I did go out... very strong interest to continue.
    Samantha

  15. #40
    Member Laurenlovecd's Avatar
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    I went out for the first time last week. I went to two different gas stations and put gas in my car. I passed with flying colors, at least I think so! So many things I didn't think of though. Like don't pull out a wallet to get your credit card out! I knew that was my first mistake. I had one guy looking at me every time I looked over his way. Maybe hi likes redheads!!! I can't wait to go out again soon.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    [SIZE="3"]Lauren[/SIZE]

  16. #41
    Full Geek Status Adriana Moretti's Avatar
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    ...to some going out is a major achivement and goal....to others its just Tuesday and others could care less and are happy behind closed doors ...everyone is different and thats ok.... ...to me...its just Tuesday....

  17. #42
    Nikki Windsor nikkiwindsor's Avatar
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    For me, it's an expression of my inner feminine self. Although I don't pass, I receive a lot of attention from those who appreciate my womanly side.
    Wearing my fuschia bodycon dress:
    http://imgur.com/6WkdAts
    For the first time, outdoors during the day:
    http://i.imgur.com/RmjIxbY.jpg

  18. #43
    Aspiring Member dominique's Avatar
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    For me it got to a point, while dressing in the house got a bit stale, but I needed to take it to the next step. That step was going out dressed and what a difference it made. I've never looked back. The attraction is I feel frier and my senses feel more hyper.

  19. #44
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by carhill2mn View Post
    One of the things that I enjoy most is being treated as a woman. Yes it is true, I am treated differently when I am presenting as a woman and I love it! This is in addition to the fact that women's clothes, jewelry, makeup etc. are much more fun to wear than men's.
    Carole has nailed it for me. Being treated as a woman is wonderful for me. Yes, it is fun. Yes, it is still a rush, but really just being another woman is where it is at. I'll add this: a number of women know me both ways, and I find that they are more relaxed (and open) with me when I am not en femme. And I get those nice knowing smiles...

    Besides, why keep the Maserati in the garage? (Thanks Eryn!)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  20. #45
    Transgender Person Pat's Avatar
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    For me it was a matter of truth. I had learned a truth about myself when I dressed in private, so I could not feel honest if I did not express that truth in public as well. It probably helped that I have a risk-taking personality. I dress mixed most days and don't even think about it but I still get a little shot of adrenaline when I step out the door in full-on Jennie mode and walk (calmly) to my car knowing that there is no concealment.

  21. #46
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    Nothing has ever stopped me from going out dressed, its who I am.

  22. #47
    Silver Member Bobbi46's Avatar
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    For me it's a way of being able to express myself in another way. A feeling of freedom and liberty and not being constrained by life as a man in drab.
    A new kind of comfort zone that only can be experienced by me in the way feel about myself. It's an ability to be able to go out feeling different but comfortable within myself.Al;so being able to mingle with other shoppers or whoever in pleasurable way. In one way a softer way of life.

  23. #48
    Member Joni Beauman's Avatar
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    I had a fun foray this week, dressed for about 3 days straight while spouse attended to family business away and had a fun trip to Kohl's, a bar for a glass of wine, then groceries. Felt so natural. The more you do it without incident the greater the confidence. I just want to be one of the girls and such experiences help reinforce that it is possible. Whether I passed with the cashiers did not seem to matter as all were quite friendly. I think I might pass but not sure and probably not with the most astute observers. I think skilled makeup is part of my solution and something to continue to work on. Those darn false eyelashes that really can make the eyes pop are still a challenge. Joni

  24. #49
    Trish Trishpdxcd2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    Rachel, I am like you. I do not identify as a woman. I am a dude regardless of my attire. Even though I look like a guy when dressed I still enjoy going out. I have written many times that going out is like screaming from the rooftops that I am "this" without saying a word. It's a validation of sorts for me. I am this way and it's ok. Now, because cross dressing is not generally acceptable, going out has an element of risk but that is not the reason I go out. And in the end, being dressed and staying at home is boring for me. It takes a lot of work to get presentable
    Well Jennifer I think you are a bit too modest and I am guessing that you pass more than you think but regardless, thats not the point. It can be frustrating dressing just in private. If you think you look good you would like people to notice sometimes, which is part of it for me. But the bigger part is that just to be out presenting as a woman is exciting and pleasurable. Not that I go out much but I relish it when I do.

  25. #50
    Junior Member Ddannie's Avatar
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    Cerra,
    Your acceptance description was a very good fit for me and I hadn't realized it. I do enjoy both dressing as a female and being perceived as one while out.
    Daniele

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