Teresa, it was too late for me in my marriage, hopefully it isn't for u.
First, the kids u mind should be sat down and given a list of rules. If they violate them, there must be consequences. Your SO must be on board with these, too. Otherwise, explain to your son u aren't babysitting anymore.
U must put your foot down with your SO. Not about CDing, but everything. U have to tell her what you've told us. And, explain how it and she is effecting your attitude. Just telling her will lift a load off u! Next, discuss the changes u would like in your "arrangement" so that u can enjoy her and your life more.
She may give it a try or tell u to forget about it, like mine did. Because I put my foot down too late. My ex wasn't having anything but her way or the hiway. So, it was the hiway for us. But, maybe it won't be for u 2?
