I live in North Carolina...

[JayeLefaye]

Thanks to all who responded. Some of you really touched my heart and gave me comfort!!!

A special thanks to Ms. Loreleah, who was gentle to someone who hadn't been here for a while.

I'll leave this "thread" now, less it devolves into something other than, umm, "comfort zones" that you once had.

Like I said, I haven't been here in a while, and never even knew there was a "Media" section when I posted this.

My suspicion is that I may drop in there more often.

Meanwhile, there have been 2 recent "bathroom law" threads deleted in the last few hours here, due, I suspect, because the responders failed to "Keep it friendly"...I'm just guessing....

So please, friends, allow this thread to remain un-deleted as long as possible, just in case someone else needs to know that they're not alone in the loss of a "comfort zone".

Just sayin'....

Jaye

[SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

Ok, I just posted my thank to all and signed out of this thread, but Reine was posting at the same time:-)...Thanks for your encouraging words!!!

As to where I pee, if I'm out for more than an hour during the day?....The farthest end of a parking lot and into the bushes!1! I don't want and GG's uncomfortable in the bathroom, and I don't want my butt kicked while standing at a urinal with my skirt hiked-up and my back turned to whoever may be coming through the door:-)

But that's just me:-)

Again...Thanks ALL!!!

Jaye

[ReineD]

Ugh ... I'm afraid there will be a lot more bathroom threads in the next while. It seems to be the pet issue of the day in Southern states (and it's a great way to sneak in new laws that benefit the bottom line of corporations), even though these bills do not reflect people's real attitudes about TGs.

I just wish that members here wouldn't fall for the hype and get so spooked over every single article.

[ReineD]

Oh gosh.

I'm contributing to this thread again to give an example of what I mean by "hype".

My SO came home and brought a copy of the student newspaper. On the front page, in big black letters, is a story of a TG student who meets with the state governor to discuss the use of bathrooms in universities. I know the students here, and no one cares whether a person who uses any bathroom is TG or cis.

But here's the situation. Higher Ed is being defunded in our state, resulting in wide-spread faculty cutbacks, which results in tuition hikes and downsizing or getting rid of PhD programs, and this will have a negative impact on the breadth of degrees awarded and undergrad enrollment, which will keep the whole thing spiraling downward. There is talk in our state of having some universities close!

So although I appreciate that this student wants to discuss bathroom issues with the governor, there might not be a university for the student to graduate from with any bathrooms to use, if the current state of affairs continues. If I were this student and had the governor face-to-face, I would prioritize a discussion of university funding and the rising cost of Higher Ed, and the possibility of having my degree program terminated and having to transfer to another university to get the degree I want (and perhaps having to repeat courses that would not transfer, resulting in an even greater debt), and the likelihood of finding a job in my field that would pay enough to enable me to not take 20 years to pay back student debt.

And then I would return home and continue to use my bathroom of choice, just as this student always has.

There is nothing on the front page of this newspaper, or any article inside, that incites students to protest against the deplorable state of affairs in our state's Higher Ed that will have a huge impact on their futures.

<edit> Thanks Amy Lynn! And I think we should remind everyone here to maintain an objective view rather than keep responding to the hype. The bottom line is that the bulk of people out there don't think negatively of TGs but this certainly is not the impression we all get through the incessant barrage of articles (and members who keep falling for the hype) on the use of TG bathrooms. It's almost as bad as the hype that surrounded Caytlin Jenner's coming out, which was another great way way to keep up readership.

[JayeLefaye]

Deep breath, Reine...Don't forget to breath! We(and the world in general) need you!

Jaye

[ReineD]

It's OK ... I'm cool. I don't blame you for starting this thread. And I hope you feel better about it now and will give encouragement to other CDers who also express fears over the bathroom issues.

My youngest son complained there was nothing to fight for the way my generation did in the 60s and 70s. I encouraged him to learn more about how our domestic and global government/corpotate systems actually work, so he can also get past all the wedge social issues and address the fundamental economic issues. Once the real economic issues are addressed, all the wedge social issues will disappear.

[PaulaQ]

I do want to caution folks to be careful out there. We are seeing quite a lot of attacks against trans women this year - not all bathroom related and not all in southern states. The problem with this issue is it gives knuckle-heads the feeling that it's open season on us. A couple of trans women were attacked by a mob in Portland, OR on Friday, for example. They were standing outside a convenience store, minding their own business when someone shouted "That's a man!" and then a group of people attacked them.

So understand that these things can happen, and I believe inciting such incidents is part of the point of the propaganda. Mostly it's a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people present. Mostly.

I'm not suggesting anyone do anything different - you have to live your lives. But the debate over trans rights is happening all over the country, and the truth is that no place is truly safe for us. So be careful and be as aware as you can be of your surroundings.

This is also just the beginning of this. Some of our enemies really do want us dead.

It hurts, Paula, thanks for asking. It just hurts.

This is a big part of the problem about this issue. The negative campaigns, hateful Facebook posts, clueless media stories, and outright hateful speech directed against us, especially in states that have passed these things takes a big toll on people. I've talked to people who lived in Houston when during the election where the current set of tactics made their debut. It is emotionally brutal to listen to ads on TV that compare you to a sex offender. Even if you aren't at ground zero where one of these things is happening, the repercussions of it can be felt all over the country. Since I run a support group, I see a lot of really frightened and depressed people because of this.

Edit: one last thought. The media aren't hyping the attacks against us. In fact they are likely suppressing reports of them quite a bit. We've seen this same thing happen with the wave of homophobic attacks against gay men in my old neighborhood. There were a number of savage attacks that were unreported by the media. I know this because several of them happened just outside of the condos where I lived.