This early in the morning, I have to get ready to go see my mom this afternoon, and ReineD is laying down the gauntlet. Well, I have one eye open and a half cup of coffee in me so here goes-
I think that most of us when we see an attractive person, be it male or female wish/envy that person's looks to a degree. I know this may only be adding the confusion, or at least mine, but if say there was a magic pill that would not take any transgender feelings from my inner core, but a pill that would alter my appearance as a male to be a better looking male, bigger, more muscular. Or maybe be as good looking as say a Ryan Reynolds, I would still be very tempted to take that pill. Even though it would not help, maybe make the trans thing harder to deal with, as my appearance would be more masculine. Gaining on one side, loosing on the other. I would be equally tempted to take a pill that would allow me to look more feminine, and have the issue be reversed, easier for trans, harder yet to be a male.
I am thinking that most people, cis people as much would have a certain envy over those who are of their gender, and think, I wish I looked like him/her. Not obsess over it, but just a small envy. 'oh how it would be nice to have her shape/hair/voice etc etc. Same goes for the guys I am sure... 'oh how it would be nice to have that full head of hair, muscularity, height, voice. I actually have encountered feeling both ways at a Trace Atkins concert once. I remember standing in line at a vendor before the show, seeing this short cute country girl, the feelings washing over me oh how I wish I was her, then seeing him onstage, he is a very tall man about 6'6" with a very deep voice, and thinking oh how I wish I was him. Hey, they call it genderfluid for a reason...
It is not really feeling down on myself for who I am or how I look, but just an envy I think most people have to some degree to be a better looking person. IRL, I get people sometimes saying to me, (physical shape and ability) not bad for an old guy, I am in fairly decent shape which is a compliment and I take it as one, but inside, my competitive nature wants to be not bad for a 20 year old....
One of the markers I suppose for not being TS would be that if I had to pick between being a very good looking man, or a not so good looking woman (society standards) overweight yadda yadda, I would pick the good looking guy. But I would also choose to be a good looking woman over a not so good looking man. I promise though, I am not obsessed on looks and I am not down on myself for my looks or someone who is considered to be not good looking.
The answer for me in the end is, no, I would not just be any woman to be a woman. If that comes off as superficial then I guess I just have to plead guilty. This forum especially as of late seems to be rather harsh and judgmental (not all, but enough) over opinions like these, and I suppose I may be riling up some by the things I say. I am being honest. IRL, my friends are varied in just about every way. Looks, monetary status, employment, sexual orientation, religious beliefs, political beliefs. I really do not judge people like that. My honesty on here about how I would like to look, take that as however you wish.
