I have often wondered what my parents thought about me playing 'pretend I am a girl games'. They were probably very relieved when i stopped. i don't remember how often i played or when or why I stopped, but it must have been quite often for me to have remembered.
I would love to ask my parents, but then they would wonder why I am asking... don't wish to open that box
A.K.A Rebecca & Bec
It is strange how memories sometimes come unbidden and interpretation is different when we are older! Just now in this order. Thinking about a friend in high school calling me "a lady's man" because I could talk with the girls. Did not realize I wanted to be them! Which led to: Girls back then wore long leg pantie girdles and nylons to school with their skirts or dresses. At least four instances of seeing the same. Girls' clothing a mystery to me at the time! I really wanted to try one of those girdles and nylons to see how they felt! Tried on my mother's and it felt so gooood but I also felt so guilty! A small glimpse into my"childhood" ! Hugs Lana Mae
Life is worth living!
"Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix
My aunts always said I should have been a girl. I remember looking at the Sears catalog and seeing the ladies underwear section and not having sexual. Dreams of them BUT wondering how I would look in lafied clothes. And keeping Mom's runned stockings when she threw them away. EM
Thanks for this thread Becky, I've really enjoyed reading all the replies.
Although I discovered I loved wearing female underwear at about age 13, I don't recall feeling feminine as such until I was about 17. I saw a Dior Homme nightshirt which was basically a woman's cotton dress and got my mother to buy it for me. My hair had grown very long and I used to wear the nightshirt tucked into jeans, so I could feel like I was going out in a dress. My happiest moment was when a waiter approached our table from behind me - I was sitting with 2 women- and said, 'Are you ladies ready to order?'.
That same year a girl left a box of things at our house to collect later, and in it was a black skirt which I could just fit into. More joy, though I never dared wear it in public. At that point my fantasy was to be Carly Simon, and I also began sitting down to pee- a habit I've never lost.
My great regret is that I didn't go headfirst into CDing, while I was young and could have passed very convincingly, but my conservative childhood and background won out and the CDing remained firmly in the background, until I was about 30.
I used to have a short attention spa
I grew up in a total male environment. My family was a typical post-WWII family. I had an older brother by fourteen months. A little sister came along when I was almost twelve, so she had no influence on me. I had four older and younger post WWII male cousins. I had two uncles, one married and one not. In my apartment building there was only one post WWII girl. There were enough guys my age to field a full baseball team and then some. There was no dress up games. My life was totally consumed with sports and games and getting into trouble.
The first three years of my life my family lived in a large house with my father's mother, my grandmother. When we moved to our won apartment. I started to have a vivid dream of myself as a woman bloodied and laying in the snow. I was wearing only white undergarments; bra, panty and slip. I was laying in the snow in a vacant lot behind a corner bar that was across the street from our apartment building. That image is still ingrained in my head. I was only three. We had no television set yet. A television would not come for another two years. The images went away. When I was nearing puberty I started to find myself drawn to my mother's slips which she always hanged to dry in either the sole bathroom in the apartment or in the hallway on a clothesline.
I often wonder if those images had something to do with the concept of "past lives." There are eastern religions which ascribed to this concept. There are even television programs and books describing these "past lives." Usually in these past lives" the recollections and images go away. I often wonder if those past lives, if they in fact do occur, influence who we become.
Definatley not a traditional little boy. I always dreamt of being a girl from my earliest memories. My parents did not support any outward expression of this, at all. A definite part of why I left home and joined the navy. I will probably always hide my real self from the greater part of the world as a result. Plus being 6' 4" does not easily convince others I'm a woman inside. So no not a traditional boy and not a traditional man now, but I except who I am now. Then I wanted so badly to be someone else.
Ohh hun you really struck a nerve with me with that stupid rhyme!! I so hated that rhyme when I was little boy. It made me feel terrible like I was some kind of monster, and I hate it today. Who would know they would have that same silly rhyme down under ( I would have thought they would be different animals). Most of my playmates when I was growing up were girls, not for any other reason than that's who lived close to me. It was wonderful actually because it was great then we were just all pals, before it got all tied up with gender and sex and relationships.We played boy games and we also played girl games, but really they were all just kids games. But sometimes when we all got together and the girls and their mom's got to talking about "kind of girl things", I feel sometimes odd man out (no pun), or maybe I should say odd boy out, and once and a while that rhyme would rear it's ugly head.Gee, I wanted to be all things nice too, like my friends. Maybe its why I crossdress today. Girls were good - boys were bad. This was also emphasized in the catholic school I went to by the terrible nuns there. I hope GGs that hang out here once and a while realize how hurtful that rhyme was to some of us.
Ok, I feel better now. I'm done with my rant - love, Annie
Last edited by AnnieMac; 10-31-2016 at 07:16 PM.
For me, I grew up thinking I was a perfectly normal little boy. I had no awareness (that I can recall) of any thoughts about gender either way. I started CDing at 14... it was only as an adult after reading Alice in Genderland that I realised that so many things I remembered were actually gender related. Looking back now the signs of what was to come later were there.
A.K.A Rebecca & Bec
What a great post everyone has they own memories. I knew very young and growing up with 7 brothers and sisters (4 brothers 3 sisters) at times made it hard and then again girls cloths every where :-). I wish i had this site or the knowledge that I wasn't the only one with theses feelings. I think I would have done things differently I did all the boys things because of course i was told to do them by everyone and everything I saw. However even with soooo many in the house I found time to express my girl side.
I started dressing at pre school age, outwardly I was a normal little boy, I did all the normal boys things, though when i had the chance ,I'd gravitate towards the girls, I always sat with the girls and I'd play with them at pre school, etc..
When i entered school I instinctiively knew that i should be playing with the boys, but at first I never really fitted in when i first joined the boys, it was around year 2 that I built a facade around me and I learnt to act as the normal,little boy. Gee it was hard trying to be that normal boy, when all I wanted was to run and play with the girls.
All through my teen years,, the other boys would be talking about how pretty this or that girl was, where I'd be thinking wow that dress would look nice on me.
Any way I got through it all, and now I'm a well adjusted 60'yo crossdressers who loves her life!
I'm not quite sure I got this rhyme right the first time I heard of it as a young child. I hated it to the very core of my being, perhaps within the right intention of the rhyme. I've also snapped upon hearing it when my age was a single digit. I ended up eating the former two ("field chickens" and escargot respectively) and befriending a stray dog as a teenager. Till this day I enjoy the company of (domestic) animals, in what must have been one hell of an ironic twist, within the plain reading of the rhyme.Originally Posted by Becky Blue
I must have mentioned elsewhere that certain disciplinary offences in primary school warranted wearing the opposite gender's uniform - one of them was hair offences. The worst I've seen in recent history that was reported only amounted to putting a hair clip on a pre-school boy's head, and remarking that his hair looked much neater. No word on what the kids thought, but it sparked a small uproar on the Internet.
I've probably never admitted this before, but Mum theoretically already saw me crossdressed (partially) when I was four or five. I was herded into the changing room when Mum tried on a dress and remarked to me how pretty she? it? was. I left, took a dress from the children's section and held it in front of myself, prompting shocked looks from her and the shop assistant. I wouldn't consider that my start, however.
I would play dress ups with a bag of mums old dressers with my sister, some times i would go across the road to play dress ups with the girl there we would play sisters or houses.i was 7 or 8.
I remember that rhyme i did not want to be made out of frogs and snails,i wanted to be made out of sugar and spice.
I remember that rhyme too. Sometimes girls used to chant it and I would burn with indignation. I grew up in a female dominated household and whereas I did a lot of typical boyish things and games I was hopeless at ball games. I took up swimming and was good at that but I know my father was bothered by the fact that I did not play ball games and once I was admonished for doing something that was "like a girl". I always felt comfortable with my gender as a child but was definitely strongly interested in feminine things and to this day I prefer female company and other than at work I tend to avoid large groups males.
Sorry I have to ask isn't wearing girls cloth doing a "girl" thing?? :-)
After reading all your childhood memories, it triggered a few more of mine... Thanks ladies
Around the age of 10, i went through what I would call my 'dark phase' for quite a while I insisted on only wearing black clothes...BUt yet my undies had to be white as I was concerned that if they were red or blue people may think I was wearing girls panties... LOL at myself what a strange kid at times...
I also recall that whilst I was OK at sport I could not catch a ball, i was told many times that I caught (or rather attempted to catch) like a girl, clapping my hands together in a vain attempt to hold onto the ball.
A.K.A Rebecca & Bec
