Sales Assistants know what you are up to

[Leohose]

The SA today was Sooo helpful - she had on nice tights and a matching black dress she held my hand and led me over to some nice pantyhose she said these are very nice and feel good a little pricy but I think you will like them she smiled and gave my ha d a slight squeeze - I thanked her and said she looked nice and asked her what brand of tights she had on she smiled and brought me over to her brand and pointed out a pair in my size - it was soo nice told her I'd see her again and purchased my tights and Pantyhose - just got home and slipped into the pantyhose - such a nice experience so yes she knew I had bought from her before

[sarah87]

If you are friendly, nice and just own it most SA's are sweet and very helpful. I have had many wonderful encourage terse at victoria secret that have turned into two friendships. The other night at payless near closing time two female sa's kept feeding me shoes and had fun with me. This is all as a guy wearing women's clothes

[TrishaLake]

Happens about half the time to me...they must know from my size that it is probably for me. I think most don't care and the other part don't want to know.

[Becky Blue]

I quite often buy things for my wife, in a funny reverse world I was asked by one SA if it was for me... I said "No not unless my wife doesn't like it". I have also gotten 'that' look on a couple of occasions. When I shop for me, i don't say they are for anyone and quite enjoy seeing the SA's reactions as they figure it out. I have yet to have any negativity from anyone.

[Davinnia]

I don't see what all the fuss is about. I worked in a mens store & women bought things all the time, no questions asked. I bought my foundation today without a second glance from the SA, same with panties. Just act confident.

[Tracy Irving]

I was looking for leggings at Kohl's yesterday hoping to take advantage of an additional 30% off. I found a pair I liked but the leg cut was "straight". I recruited the help of no less than three SA's in our quest for the right pair. We searched through the athletic section, Vera Wang near lingerie and the juniors area, finding nothing. They all assumed I was buying for a SO in my life. The SA's were not young women and it was a week before Christmas. So, there is the possibility that none of them knew what I was up to. I hope not...

[lingerieLiz]

Special times like Christmas and Valentine Day, is when most men buy their SOs gifts. I've done a lot of shopping over the last 50 years. Even back in the old days SAs knew. I worked for a store that carried upscale women's clothes. It didn't take long for a few of the SAs to figure out I was buying for myself. When something came up in my size that they thought I would look good in they would come by and say, I have something your sister would look good in. I also got coaching of what I should wear under and with it. We didn't sell lingerie, but a couple SAs shopped where I did. They asked, don't you like shopping there?

Now days I shop in guy mode. I may have on all women's clothes (don't wear dresses anymore). What is amazing is I've gone to buy something and said it was for me and the SA disregard it. With a bra on and projection I had an SA who kept telling me that "my wife" wouldn't want that style bra. Had a couple SAs ask if the two bras I was buying were for me? I said yes. One of them held the bras up and said, they will match your eyes. I guess she didn't notice my boobs or bra lines which were obvious.

Comments I've received: I don't think we have anything on sale in your size today. How did your slips fit? Everyone should enjoy beautiful lingerie. I've only had a few negative things said in all this time.

[Echo Logical]

When I first started dressing, I would say that the clothes were for a girlfriend. Then one day I was shopping at Payless Shoe sources for some Ankle boots, and the SA quite rudely said, "I hope these aren't for you". I was angry enough at her comment, that I replied, of course they are, then immediately after I purchased them, I put them on, asked for the corporate number, and called them as I strutted out to my car in my brand new Ankle Boots.

I have never again had a situation like that, and have always been upfront about who I am buying for. I find that most SA's love to help me find things that look great.

A couple of years ago, I was the SA, at an adult toy store with lots of lingerie, and I often helped other gurls find what they were looking for. Some were shy, but I would often break the ice by saying that "if I were shopping for me, then this is what I would get" I got a lot of repeat customers by doing that.

[Shayna]

Less worried about the SA knowing its for me than running into someone I know. In the past I've had SAs who were very helpful.

[Alice_2014_B]

Once bought some red lipstick from the BX on base.
I was in uniform and wearing my wedding ring.

Young lady cashier said, "this will look great on you."
She did say it sarcastically, I took no offense.
I replied, "Thank you", equally sarcastic.

Looking back, I should have replied that it will match my red dress I just bought from the thrift store on base.

[Eva Bella]

I do most of my shopping online, but I really enjoy buying makeup and certain clothing in stores. Pretty much always in guy mode.

The makeup.. who knows what they think. I'm pretty knowledgable and like to talk shop with the SA's. Many of the ask if I'm a photographer or somehow working with models. I'm not usually volunteering any information unless they specifically ask. I have told a few of them that the makeup is for me, but I don't go into details. Who knows, maybe they think I'm in a throwback 1980s New Wave band.

For clothing.. I usually only shop at BCBG Max Azaria. The clothing fits me well and has a lot of stretch. My first time there, I picked out some dresses and asked to try them on. The girl gave me a strange glance and I calmly said "I'm genderfluid and I'm generally wearing BCBG stuff two or three times a week. I'm looking for more of it." And that was it... everything was cool! Most of them know me now, and I'm really popular when I come in. As some other posters said, it breaks up the monotony for the sales staff, and they really enjoy chatting with me and finding new things for me to buy. It's really important to be calm, confident, and fun about it. It is fun! They'll get into the spirit if you're owning it.

For shoes.. I'll often only go to self-serve places. Sometimes DSW, and sometimes department stores at the end of the season, when all of the markdown stuff is arranged by size. I'm not uncomfortable shopping for shoes, but most stores are simply not carrying my size (11) in their inventory. It's a bummer to see something really cute and then it's not available. So I don't court temptation, and only really shoe shop when I can see what my options are. I buy most of my shoes online.

[Kiwi Primrose]

I have had nothing but good treatment when buying for myself and if fitting is a problem I discuss it with the SA.

[londonman111]

I do agree most SAs don't really care as long as you are polite. I personally prefer shopping online as much easier and with amazon this becomes very easy as can even use amazon lockers to get it delivered.

[nikinylons]

I went out and shopped at stores for years. It was more of a thrill and finding acceptance than it was finding something that fit exactly right. It was fun, scary, fulfilling, and aggravating at the same time. What felt and looked good in the exciting moment at the store, when I got home didn't fit well at all. If the SA was even a shred patronizing and made me uncomfortable, I was uncomfortable and made quick irrational buying decisions. After all of that those years, now I buy online at home from www.crossdresser.com. I'm not paid to promote them but rather a satisfied customer of their outfits that are truly made to fit men. Women's outfits rarely fit us well and why out yourself through all the BS other than the satisfaction of making it through it to say that you did it? Once you get over the search for validation by going out into public and buying things that aren't made to fit you, you will be much more content in who you are. Just my opinion from lots of scary experiences. Enjoy it while you can dear! Cheers!

[Eva Bella]

+1 for crossdresser.com (Suddenly Fem)

It's a wonderful site - they design the clothing themselves and make much of it right here in the United States. I know a lot of girls who have great clothes from there.

[Jessicajane]

This is conjecture of course but I strongly suspect that most sales assistants guess very quickly...and just don't care they want a sale and as long as you conduct yourself in an appropriate manner they will afford you the same courtesy they give other women...sometimes even a little more..

Why do I think this...well firstly when we go in to a women's clothes shop we figure that we are the only one that has done so that day...errrr wrong ...very probably...having spoken to many many SA over time from various shops they get on average 2-3 men buying and they pretty much guess its for them each time..they often will say nothing or go along with the pretense of girlfriend or wife to help us not feel uncomfortable...but they know..

Of course occasionally a man will buy for his girlfriend and wife but the vast majority of men buying clothes in a size that will fit them are read pretty much straight away...

The thing is not to be stressed by this but understand that they don't care...seriously...they don't...they want to make a sale and that's it....

sure there will be the exception to the rule SA 's who either lives under a rock or are just plain rude...guess what ..women get that themselves all the time...a rude SA is rude to a cross section of people an not just trans women...

I have shopped for womens clothes for years now both as a man and as Jessica, only on one or two occasions have I had anything other than a pleasant experience... once they took 5 min to decide if I could try on a bra in an empty shop...they eventually decided I could ...pfff seriously...!!, the other time the woman said "oh your one of them.." she was young and the next week she was gone...lol I either scarred her off or she realized she was not cut out for retail......and that is the only negativity of any type out of hundreds of visits to the stores....

Moral of the post...go shop in confidence and get something that fits and looks good...don't stress, don't rush and enjoy xx

[Lacey New]

I recall having a nice conversation with a very lovely middle aged SA at a Vanity Fair Outlet where I was en drab but purchased three pair of panties, a lovely size 42 nylon and lace camisole and a pair of petti-pants. She was commenting on how she was disappointed that these lovely things were getting difficult to find anymore and that very few people appreciate them as they did a few years ago. Naturally, I agreed - she just smiled. I am sure she knew who would be wearing them.

[Tracy Irving]

After all of that those years, now I buy online at home from www.crossdresser.com. I'm not paid to promote them but rather a satisfied customer of their outfits that are truly made to fit men.

I can't speak to whether or not they fit better but I have been able to find more than enough well fitting clothing designed for women. The racks at the thrift stores in my area are filled with more items than I have room for. Not to mention all the retail stores. Clothes, clothes everywhere! It does take more time than clicking a button online but that is part of the fun.

[joank]

I was going through the check out at Target with sleepwear PJ's and other stuff for my wife (really) and the SA(guy) says it (bottoms) 'will look really good on you.' I agreed and kept on packing the items.

[gownman]

There is a very pretty lingerie clerk of oriental descent at the Dillard's store where I shop. Quite soon after I started shopping there, she figured out that I was buying things for myself. We have become friendly; she always says hello and gives me her sweet smile. She knows what I like and I never buy anything except from her.

[susan54]

I shop and try on as man and woman but I keep to the same shops and the SAs know I am male. They say they occasionally see men shopping and they suspect it is for themselves but daren't say anything in case they cause offence and they say they would love to help especially when they believe he is making a mistake. It pays to come clean.

[joanna4]

I am a sales associate and I know what people are up to but shoplifting is quite obvious and a concern for us.

[Joanne108]

I had one negative interaction recently. I was at a drugstore buying some makeup and pantyhose. I was fully dressed as a woman and I thought I looked damn good.
I went in walked around. It was amazingly freeing to not have to worry abut buying women’s things. I took my stuff to the cashier, waited in line to be cashed out. The cashier made some remark about my voice. I said “I have a cold.” I did. Then she said, “You are too tall for a woman, I think you are you not a real a woman”.
Before i could reply the woman behind me in line said “She is jealous because you are a pretty woman and she is an old hag.” Then this nice woman turned to the cashier and said "My daughter is taller than this lovely woman! I think you owe this lady an apology."
The cashier muttered something about having a bad day and half apologized. And that was it all in about 30 seconds. I said thanks to the woman and that was it.
I checked myself back in the car everything looked good. i went home.

[Jenny22]

For many years I've always bought my tons of feminine stuff as a guy. I've only had one SA ask me if a dress fit. I said yes, I know my size. She was the embarassed one!

[MelanieAnne]

I've never been asked if something was for me. But I have been asked "is this a gift". I just say yes.