Just a generally question throwing out here.
I know that men don't cry is a fallacy but are those who identify towards female more emotional in general?
No real reason, just fancy a discussion
Just a generally question throwing out here.
I know that men don't cry is a fallacy but are those who identify towards female more emotional in general?
No real reason, just fancy a discussion
It's hard to say; so many men simply repress their feelings, that it's difficult to surmise whether they are feeling anything at all. Perhaps we can guess by observing the actions used to keep those emotions under wraps, such as aggressive activities, insomnia, smoking, overeating, etc..
Myself? Yes. The subconscious repression results in more frequent and easier eruptions of tears when exposed to very sad or happy things, for example. Seems the constant with holding of expressing my feelings decreases the threshold where I can't contain them anymore. Still, I try not to do so within sight of anyone else. For while women SAY that it's OK for a man to cry, over and over the real response is that they don't want us to. They reserve that, for themselves. Sure, we're 'allowed' to cry, but only if they think it's due to a SERIOUS issue. Unlike themselves, who they feel it's perfectly ok just to 'have a good cry' whenever they feel necessary. That would never be considered OK for a guy to do. We're only allowed to cry if, say, someone we're close to dies or something. Indiscriminate crying is only a female prerogative.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I don't think there's a direct link. My father was far more emotional than my mother, but not the least bit feminine. Some people and some families and some cultures are more reticent than others.
Oh yes, I cry, a sad song, a soppy film, but only when there's no one else around. Should add that when I had to have my beloved cat put down at the vets I blubbed like a baby.
Last edited by DIANEF; 04-18-2017 at 07:03 PM.
Here today, gone tomorrow....
For me this is one of the things that help me to understand more my trasgenderism because I'm very resilient to the physical damage but not to the emotional. I can go to tears with something romantic or sad but not with the physical pain.
So that connected with other elements from my childhood took me to understand and accept myself as a transgender person and looking everyday more to get out completely from the closet.
It's me, just a sensitive woman in the core with a strong male appearance...
I think that I will replace my signature here..
HRT 042018; Full time 032019
Orchiectomy 062020; gender& name legal changed 102020
Electrolysis face begins 082019, in genitals for GCS 062021
Breast augmentation surgery 012022
GCS 072022; BBL 022023; GCS revision 04203;END TRANSITION
Interesting views.
I cry at sad things like most human beings but sometimes I want to cry for no reason whatsoever but the stigma of men crying means I hold it back.
Which I am sure isn't healthy thing to do
For most of my life I repressed my emotions that I felt were feminine emotions. I was and still am great at being aloof, stone faced, holding emotions in. Just lately I am giving myself permission to express emotions, especially crying or getting misty eyed. I do believe some women really like a man to express emotions/cry while others believe it's reserved for women and a sign of weakness for a man to emote/cry. I was recently at the movie "The Shack" with my wife and her best friend and they commented it was cute that I cried a few times during the movie.
Kairi,
I feel the assumption is correct, on the other side of the coin I smile far more.
The one time the floodgates really opened was when I came out to my wife, within a few minutes of trying to tell her I started to cry and sobbed like had never done before or since, it was like a millstone being lifted off my shoulders.
One other time I became very emotional was when a guy who I knew threw himself off an overpass onto the main road only a few hundred yards from my home. Having been very close to feeling the same way twenty years ago it brought some of those thoughts back , at one point I imagined myself standing on the parapet.It was very hard driving past that point everyday and seeing his picture and the fading flowers for well over two weeks.
For myself, yes. My personality type (Myers Briggs) is INFJ. In my work life I was often "accused" of being "too emotional".
Upside is a lot of joy in life. Downside can be some real depths of sadness.
Fancy that.
I am not very emotional at all. Gender is not a good gauge for emotional expression. My Grandpa, would cry and show emotion easily. My grandma show little to no emotion most of the time, in fact the only timei had ever seen her cry was at my grandpa's funeral.
Sara
I don't know if all men who are transgendered women cry. I am very emotional person. I have to agree with Venesa that like her, I can take a lot of physical punishment and I have but I am very fragile when it comes to my emotion.
Was raised very emotionally repressed, so the freedom of emotional expression is really what drew me to CDing. I wouldn't say that I'm MORE emotional when I'm in girl mode, but I'm definitely more expressive in girl mode.
Kairi, I think its quite simple, as a male growing up in the 70s we were taught to behave like 'a man' part of that was to follow male hobbies and pastimes, male careers, male role models, male body language, male emotions etc etc.. when older and we realise that we are not meant to be that way and accept or even embrace our inner girl, we start shedding decades of perhaps suppressed behaviors that could include allowing our emotions to come out.
A.K.A Rebecca & Bec
My house was totally "feeling" suppressed, father alcoholic, Mom very cold, sister attic...not very good. Took me years to figure out how to show feelings. Thankfully years of therapy have assisted (funny enough I am pretty immune to pain). I will say while my friends do hide feelings as guys are taught to do, they are more open as they grow older. Hopefully as a society this stops being a female /male thing , as people should feel comfortable just being themselves. Unfortunately, not how society judges us...
No regrets except I should have got dressed & stepped out sooner.
I do not cry that much at sad things as I do at happy things! Ok,yes, I cried when my wife passed away! When really good things happen, I will cry for joy!! Just noticing it a lot lately, do not think I did it that much before! Hugs Lana Mae
Life is worth living!
"Foxy lady! You look so good!!" Jimi Hendrix
WOW..ok..I've have had physical injuries, really bad ones, I didn't whimper...even stitches in and taken out no anesthesia, not one tear drop. Real tough-guy garbage there, reasons unknown...
On the other hand, death of my beloved dog, haven't stopped the waterworks yet (1 year later)..certain pieces of music, played at just the right moment, blubbering mess (quietly of course)..oh yea, this was a subject I guess I'd never really thought about! another good topic for my therapist!
Does choking and gagging at the end of ET every single tine count?
I would like to think that I have more empathy & sensitivity than your typical macho male. Is it because I am transgender? It's hard to say which came first.
A minor point..
Being 'more emotional' or not may not be the question that needs asking.
'Manly Men' I know tend to be angry, bitter, sarcastic and 'macho' in a much larger proportion to displaying 'softer' emotions. However, none of these sets of feelings are unique to either and occur in both in different proportions.
Sorry for being nit-picky. I believe the OPs intent was asking about what we tend to see as 'female' emotions.
<3
- MM
- Madame Moose - on my way to Anne
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"I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And when I am for myself, what am 'I'? And if not now, when?" - Hillel the Elder
I can cry like a big fat baby at the drop of a hat...
As a whole maybe or at least they think they do.
Emotion is not something I had for so long and I am trying to learn how to let it out when I need to.