I certainly wish the very best in your effort to quit. I have recent experience of going 18 months after a purge....re-emerging briefly in March, and going back on the abstinence path again in May. I haven't purged, but everything I purchased since March is packed up in a large suitcase. My plan, to the extent that I have one, is to leave it there, untouched for some period of time, then donate the lot of it to Good Will.
But that is only dealing with the physical manifestations of CDing. I'm also working on my mind-set. In managing my thoughts my first effort is on re-writing my inner narrative that has contributed to seeing myself as a CDr and transgendered. Mind you, I'm not trying to apply any sort of negative image or meaning to CDing or gender variations...but rather to question the underlying assumptions, memory constructs, motivations and doubts that have contributed to this particular, long-held self image. I don't know if it will work....maybe the process is itself a practice in self deception.
