Hello Girls,
Not sure what overcame me in the past 3 weeks or so but I’ve summoned the courage not to go out once but five times in total! I noticed that 2 things helped immensely is that you do build up confidence the more times you do it and having a friend with you helps.
I was always in full makeup (probably with below average skills), clothing ranging from t shirt and jeans to a midi dress. Shoes ranging from heeled and non-heeled ankle boots to flats.
This first venture out was on my own and it was probably not a good idea? Not to mention I wore heeled ankle boots which made me even taller, I can say that I’m probably the tallest person there! I’m 6’1” in flats, weighing 132lbs. The heels made those clicking sound which caused everyone to look in my direction as it was an off day at a local shopping area. I’m the only one clicking! I still remember it was so nerve wrecking that I was tunnelled visioned into thinking every pair of eyes were on me (which probably was the case), and I couldn’t take my mind off it. I did my business (purchased some beer) and quickly back to my car and off I went.
The 4 other outings were with a GG friend whom I stuck to like glue! She had a fair bit of shopping that needs to be done so I was just there accompanying her. We shopped for things ranging from clothes, bags, shoes, jewelleries to supermarket groceries. We ate at restaurants and just did what everyone else was doing. By the fifth time (yesterday), I actually went out alone to meet her in town and I felt much better walking on my own passing people. I was still conscious of the stares but definitely not tunnel visioned.
Funny thing I noticed was the fact that most men looked bored and uninterested with all the shopping that’s happening around us. Mostly just sat in chairs and sofas that’s been provided by the stores, and I thought, OMG you don’t know what you’re missing out on!
I did notice that the more times I went out it became easier and the more I’m able to focus on what needs to get done instead of “OMG who’s staring”. Having my friend there I believe is the biggest help and confidence booster, it made me feel that she’s deflecting some of the stares and made me feel I’m a normal person. This is just how I feel, definitely not saying that CD’ing is not normal. Who’s to say what is normal in the first place! Anyway, that’s another topic.
The highlight was overhearing a couple say “Is he a guy or a girl” after I walked past them. That made my day because she had to ask the question. We did get 2 incidents with idiots shouting comments from their cars, but who cares about them. Oh and eating with a wig is a real pain in the butt.
I hope that my experience is somewhat useful for girls that’s considering going out for the first time.
I’m looking forward to going out again this afternoon for lunch. OMG what am I going to wear?!