Suzy, let her read this: https://www.webmd.com/brain/features...rains-differ#1
Or this: https://stanmed.stanford.edu/2017spr...different.html
and this: https://www.sciencemag.org/news/2017...-men-and-women
Suzy, let her read this: https://www.webmd.com/brain/features...rains-differ#1
Or this: https://stanmed.stanford.edu/2017spr...different.html
and this: https://www.sciencemag.org/news/2017...-men-and-women
umm-m-m. Conflicted / defeated??
I've always known (as far back as I can remember) that I was supposed to have been born a girl. I even began counselling / HRT in my 40's to 'make the switch'.
But I'm also a realist, and the mirror isn't a friend. At a point on the way, my reflection reminded me that I'd "never fit in" if I continued on that course.
That - and the potential cost (financial, familial, social, etc.) of transitioning stopped me. I guess that my need isn't so strong that I had to say "damn the torpedos"
I live - uncomfortably- somewhere in the middle... male to the outside world, dressed feminine (a bit) at home, wishing I had more but knowing that understanding that I'm in an OK spot. It's a compromise, but it works. Other than this unsatisfied longing/desire/not-quite-need, I have a good life and don't want to do anything to mess it up.
How does that phrase go - something about living lives of "quiet desperation"?
Born male, but was lousy at it. it took about 50 years for me to discover why. Crossdressing had always been just a fetishy thing for me until I began to understand myself after a long long time.
As a MIAD I have to agree with that pronouncement. I am a man but spend most of my time in skirts and lingerie which I no longer consider as strictly women's clothing. I never considered myself to be a female; always a man. Look at the spectrum of clothes that people wear. Is there are a clearly defined demarcation line? On this side female on that male. What I wear all the day long is what I like, what is comfortable to wear. I no longer think of myself as crossdressing, just wearing my clothes.
GeorgeA
formerly Salerba
"a miad" Man-in-a-Dress
Hi Kimberly,
I've been thinking a lot about this.
By "how you identify", I presume you mean male, female, NB, etc, etc? After all, that's what this whole site is about!
But after pondering it for a while, I have to say "none of the above".
Huh?
If I had to answer ... it would be parent, grandparent, scientist. Those are the big identities.
M/F, etc, are all secondary. If some magic were to happen and I woke up as a genetic female tomorrow, I'd be "whatever". I'd probably wear dresses a lot, and occasionally "cross dress" in 3-piece men's suits or the like. But I'd still identify as those other things.
If I had to answer something in the gender space, it would be either "male with a little bit of femaleness" or "a little bit of female with a lot of maleness". That all leads to the question of "why am I here?" - well, that's simple, I cross dress. When I signed up for the site I was more in the "what's going on with me? am I this? am I that? am I somewhere in between?" kind of space and hoped to get a bit of a sense of direction to start working all that out. I think that it's been an amazing success in that I've come to realize that (to me) it's not that important -- almost, but not quite, as trivial as hair color (ok, that might be a little overly simplified). I realize that for many other people, the question of gender identity is fundamental and critical -- and it's reading those accounts that have led me to realize that my gender id is not that fundamental to me.
Sometimes I feel this way, sometimes that, and it's comforting to conform to how I feel ... but if I don't, it's no big deal either.
So why do I cross dress then? I think a lot is that it acknowledges & accepts & comforts my female bits. Even though I am physically deep in the closet, psychologically, to me, I am out and not denying/fighting/...
Hope that helps &
Thanks for letting me rant
Fran
p.s. I hope no one takes my general thought that gender identity is "no big deal" as applying to anyone but me ... the fact that it _is_ a big deal to so many/all of _you_ serves as fine examples against which I can judge myself. -- fran
Last edited by Fran-K; 05-21-2019 at 05:33 AM.
I am a straight male that enjoys a vivid imagination and indulging myself in my fantasies and desires. So to explain this is simple I learned many years ago I only need to be me and that is who I am no matter what I'm doing or wearing.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Fran
It's worth something just being around to Fuss!
I don't know exactly where i fit into the spectrum.
I don't want to transition but neither do i identify with traditional masculine streotypes. I guess these days i think of myself as gender-blurred, or perhaps gender-indifferent. The best i can do is just be the person i wanna be, whatever that is....
"The only way is onward. There is no turning back."
I feel that I'm a "feminine" angel in human disguise.
T-shirt says: "Hi, I Crossdress!"
Male
I just happen to also wear women's clothes.
Hi ... I think that says it best for me too. When I first joined this site, i had more questions about being a man who struggled to be some sterotype of what was around me. It sort of Chicago/Italian family man but my family were above being part of the neighborhood. This was my concept of what I had to contend with to be successful where I lived.
A lot has passed since the old days but I am always thinking of the manly things I did to fit in. I’d love to shave fully and not have to play a role but I can’t. And that’s okay.
I’ve been a woman many times in life. Not sure when but part of me was always on the bottom for a long period of time. It feels very comfortable to be. It always did.
AND I’ve learned to smile! Thanks CDdotcom. ❤️❤️〰️robbin
PS Thanks for the nice question. Mississippi. Someday I want to go there for the banjo music ... to play and look like Meridith Moon. What a dream. ~by XX
Last edited by Robbin_Sinclair; 05-23-2019 at 09:20 AM.
Trans Female, because I should have been born a girl.
I don't understand. I don't identify.
I identify as Transgender because drag or drab, I am a GM that always feels like a woman and I always have since I was like 10 years old.
Last edited by Robertacd; 05-23-2019 at 11:35 AM.
I think I am closer to a dual personality.... but not in a strange way. I have a male personality and a female one.
Growing up in the 50's &60's we didn't have the concepts of bi gendered or gender fluid. Even transgender(transsexualism in those days) wasn't much on the radar. You were either male or female or queer. I spent much of my early life trying to prove to myself I wasn't the latter. This made me a more timid, secretive and introverted person than I probably would have been otherwise.
Now, at 69 I know I am not a woman; My body dysphoria is not strong enough to make me think about transitioning after a lifetime of conforming to the social expectations of a male bodied person. On the other hand, I feel no real identification with maleness, other than habituation. I have some feminine hobbies, but almost any hobby nowadays can really be seen as androgynous. I dress in woman's clothing most days, but it's not just about the clothes. I am married for 40 years to a woman, and at her request I don't go out dressed.
So, I guess, bi gendered, gender fluid, or agender. I'm coming to the concept late in life, so I guess I'll just let the pronoun issue slide.
I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.
I'm a Crossdresser. I have no idea why but glad I'm like I am.
Angie
It's an interesting question, and one that most friends ask when I come out to them. I guess the short answer is non-binary or gender-fluid.
Earlier, when I only dressed in private and kept it a secret from everyone, I felt the need to be a girl constantly. As I started coming out to more friends, having conversations about girls' stuff, and going out in public, the frequency of wanting to be a girl has become less, but it's still there. Given a choice, would I be a guy at all? If I could switch at will, I think I would choose to be a guy about half the time, and a girl half the time. I don't see that happening outside of science fiction or fantasy, though!
Personally, I know I am both male and female currently in a male body. I love clothes and in particular female clothes as it helps me express.
I know I don't want to be a woman fully and I am not a man fully. But having both parts is a awesome gift! so cool to go either way - no boundaries
I am Transgender. No matter my outside appearance, inside I am female. I present as a male for my wife and her world. I am happy as I am and feel no need to upset any carts that don’t need overturning.
Be yourself. Everyone else is taken!
I'm just myself. Which means, I like sometimes to dress as a woman, but I feel like I'm still a man (or genderless).
I use my male voice, no fake breast...I don't feel the need to force on aspect I do not like.
However, I don't dislike when someone use Miss towards men, since I take this as a form of respect.
Last edited by Hogrom; 06-02-2019 at 01:46 PM.
I'm a man in a man's body.
But I love the variety of clothes on offer to women and how just simply changing from daytime underwear into a sexy thong or a classy dress can change your mood.
I love dressing and the fun it brings but I'll always be a man.
Xxx
I was born into a religious culture where if it hangs you are a man and if it doesn't you are a woman, no questions about it. However growing up, I always knew I was different from the boys and many of them knew it too. I was severally bullied as a child by other boys (and even some of my own family) because I hated most boy type activities and was drawn to girl activities though I dared not to partake in many due to the repercussions that would have came from the bullies, family, and church. Then from my late teens until my early forties, I buried myself into every kind of guy or manly thing that I could bury myself into tying to hide from what I knew I really was inside. Then a dear friend (known here as Christinac) came out to me as being trans and began to transition and that encouraged me to, instead of hiding what I am, explore what I really am. I still not a hundred percent "out" yet, but I am not hiding as much as I once was too.
How I identify?
I check my underwear, of course!
When haters hate, I celebrate!