During my time attending my husband's social group, I found that one of the reasons that some wives struggled with CDing is the "behavior" that is exhibited while CDing.
There was a couple that had lived together for three years and the GF was recently informed about the CDing. She was surprised but on board and accepting about the dressing. We attended a PRIDE party together where the CDer - in full view of the GF- started dirty dancing, grinding away on a man. The poor GF watched for a while then disappeared. I found her locked in the ladies restroom sobbing away. It took some convincing for her to come out. Her CDer boyfriend proceeded to tell her that he was "caught up in the moment". She later found out that the CDer really liked to be able to attract and be with men while dressed. The outcome: they broke up.
Another CDer did not want his accepting wife to go out with him because he liked to party all night with his CDer friends and then eat breakfast with them in the am. He would not go to weekend family functions with her because weekends were his party nights.
One other story about a CDer who only wanted to visit fetish establishments while dressed. The wife didn't want to participate so she was painted with the "non-accepting brush".
Of course, there were many happy outcomes. However, I have witnessed so many sad stories that involved behavior that just couldn't be ignored.
So, it's not always "about the clothes". Behaviors and attitudes matter. There were possibly other underlying problems in the marriages of these examples but sometimes there is just a breaking point.
