What would really make you happy?

[Aka_Donna]

I don't recall this topic being discussed and question was asked me and I didn't know how to respond.

Note this is a serious question and not just trival.

Think about answer before replying. Automatic non-thinking response may be to dress more.

But would it really change much?

We have a wide spectrum of dressing styles, from DADT to full time dressing.
So a subquestion: would change in dressing frequency or style have a lasting effect a few years down the road after change, or would it be more of "been there, done that, boring"?

A former member would have responded not happy, but less discordance, so less unhappiness and more wholeness.

Think, ponder, and then post a response.

[Maid_Marion]

The widespread availability of non-gendered bathrooms.

[BTWimRobin]

I generally keep my toes painted. My wife never says a word to me about it ... does she notice? I'm sure she does .... A complement would really make me happy.

[sarah_hillcrest]

Great question, I've thought alot about it. Where does happiness come from? Sometimes I just feel happy for no reason, but I think generally happiness comes from a perceived improvement in one's conditions. Like lottery winners report being very happy for a time then return back to normal once the newness of being wealthy has worn off.

Dressing obviously makes me happy or I wouldn't do it, but when it's over I'm sad in fact I'm sad for quite some time. At first it's far more intense for a short time as I got back to normal, but then it lingers for several days as a combination of not feeling my normal is right, partially because without a beard I'm not normal. Eventually I feel normal again.

So I suppose if I dressed more frequently my normal might begin to shift, if I dressed all the time my normal would eventually become the girl and that hit of pleasure would be gone, of course the urge to dress would go away so perhaps their would be a net gain in my overall happiness.

So you're not asking what would make me happy, but "really happy" which I think might refer to a lasting happiness. I don't really think there is a such a thing, at least not without the help of pharmaceuticals... But lets take a stab at it. In one of the science fiction series I've read, I think it was Ian M Banks, Culture, life expectancy for people is very long and it is possible to switch biological sex at a genetic level easily over the course a few weeks. It becomes commonplace for some people to switch every so often and this is considered a normal and healthy exploration of the human condition. So take away all the sci fi stuff, but wouldn't it be nice if an interest in living as the opposite gender was considered a healthy exploration of the human condition.

[docrobbysherry]

World peace.
Ridding the planet of Covid 19.
The end of hunger and poverty.
Passing with my real face.

Not necessarily in that order!

[Jean 103]

K but didn't they cancel the rose parade this year?

Happiness comes from with it, as they say. There are triggers that can definitely affect your current mood.

Like pulling up to the laundry mat and the parking spot and machines you like are open.

Washer's are finishing, time for the dryer's.

The clouds are parting, next stop the Beach. Maybe Joann's first.

The day so far priceless.

It's just the little things that make me happy, like freedom

[caryn m]

What would make me really happy? Being truly accepted instead of merely tolerated.

[Gillian Gigs]

That people would get along with each other, stop judging, and just accept one another in spite of race, colour, religion, etc, etc, etc,......

I know that there are many people who wouldn't like, or accept some of my clothing choices. They expect me to conform to their way of thinking, but why?

I want world peace, to rid the planet of Covid 19, end hunger, poverty, and pass with my real face, too. Yet some just aren't happy until I think and act just like them, and unfortunately they are found in every arena of life.

In the mean time I will have to do the best I can, with what is available to me. So I will continue to underdress and wear skirts only at home.

[kimdl93]

If the question is restricted to the realm of gender presentation and/or cross dressing, its easy. I would be happy if I could be exactly who I am, presenting myself as I wish, without concern about how other people might react.

And looking at my response, it seems that Jean is correct. Happiness in those terms is entirely under my control.

[Kandi Robbins]

I am assuming when asking the question, it should be somewhat based in reality.

Frankly, pre-COVID I was pretty happy. Then the pandemic hit and everything I worked hard to create for me as Kandi was wiped out and I expect much will not return. Can we just go back about six months?

[Sometimes Steffi]

Kandi. What;s the big problem? Can't find any batteries for your "Wayback Machine"? I have the same problem.

What would I like. I'd love it if my wife upgraded her CD acceptance from "Tolerates" to "Accepts".

If I were to dream big, I would love, love, love it if my wife upgraded to "Encouraging" or "Participating".

Alas, it's a bridge too far.

[Bobbi46]

Total unequivocal acceptance for all levels of our commpunity, plus a gay pride parade in my local town would be the icing on the cake.

[EmilySmith]

What would make me really happy? Being truly accepted instead of merely tolerated.

I totally agree with your statement sister!

[Sandi Beech]

Hi

Despite the fact that my wife has zero tolerance to my dressing, I actually had it pretty good pre-covid. I feel like Kandi in that I would be happy just to go back 6 months when I was dancing at Piranha in Vegas in my black sequin mini skirt. How much better does it get than that? I feel like I took what I had for granted. Gee it fun back then.

Sandi

[AllieSF]

I really like Jean 103's and Kimdl93's answers. I totally agree that happiness comes from within and is really not dependent on others. You can have all kinds of problems, some very, very serious and still be happy. Yes, we have bad and unhappy moments, but to let those downer moments control our total life is not good. For some it is easier than for others. That is same for being successful at school, at work or in relationships. We can't always have everything that we want or need, but with the right attitude we can, and, more importantly, we do overcome our obstacles and are happy. There are things that we can do to help us be happier, but that core happiness comes from within each of us.

Allie

[Micki_Finn]

Make me really happy? That’s easy. My Drag mother hits it big time and I get to travel with her being her assistant. Would it change much? Yes! It would be a huge lifestyle change. Would it get a little tiresome? Well... yes, to an extent, but sometimes when you reach your goal you’re just happy with it.

[char GG]

Mod response:

Since this is the MtF forum, I believe the OP's happiness question has to do with CDing:

From SirDonna:

We have a wide spectrum of dressing styles, from DADT to full time dressing.
So a subquestion: would change in dressing frequency or style have a lasting effect a few years down the road after change, or would it be more of "been there, done that, boring

[Jenny22]

Having breast growth and a smaller nose.

[Alexis West]

a couple of things added and a couple removed

[amandagurl2014]

What would make me happy? A lovely and attractive women to make me her wife. And to be a twenty something all over again

[Crissy 107]

Having breast growth and a smaller nose.

Jenny, You have me smiling with this.

[GaleWarning]

Mod response:

Since this is the MtF forum, I believe the OP's happiness question has to do with CDing:

From SirDonna:

Noted, Char GG.��

Long response ...
If I could wake up every morning and look forward to the day; then go to bed at the end of the day feeling as if I have thoroughly enjoyed every moment of the day, then I would be eternally, blissfully happy.

Being able to indulge in a spot of crossdressing for at least some time during my day is, naturally, part of the equation.

It makes me happy!

[Nadine Spirit]

Happiness is being able to be me everyday and not worry anymore about what clothes I chose to put on my body.

I pondered once upon a time if i were ever afforded this opportunity would I tire of it, so far nope, not in the least. I’m never going back.

[Kelly DeWinter]

It would have been nice to have had the level of acceptance 30 years ago as we enjoy now, but that could be said of just about everything these days. Oh and if they would bring back vinyl records.

[Bobbi46]

I am with Nadine on this one, I wake up in the morning and like every other morning the day is mine to do as I please, I dress every day because dressing is now a 24/7 way of life for me. It creates in me great happiness that I can be myself ,dress how I please, but at the same time have this great degree of acceptance within the community that I live in.