Hi Erika,
I am married and have been for 11 years. My wife learned of my crossdressing about 5 years ago. At first it was very difficult and we weren't sure if we would stay together but we have managed so far. During that time my wife has slowly become more accepting of it. I wouldn't say she is supportive but she really does try to work with me. I'm in sort of a middle ground between DADT and supportive.
Elizabeth