All I have to do to cure myself of the crossdressing bug is take a picture of myself. The mirror looks "not ridiculous" but the camera removes all illusions about being an even somewhat attractive woman.I look like an old man with boobs and a wig. Anyone else have a similar problem?
Oh yeah hahah same
I am in a similar situation, but don't see it as a problem.
So many new things to learn
We all tend to idealized what we look like, but the passage of time is relentless. We often boast about looking 20 years younger and it's great to feel that way. However, take a moment to stand in a room full of people who are actually 20 years younger than yourself and you will soon understand the facts of life. This applies to someone 40 or 60 or 80. There's certainly nothing wrong or bad about aging.
To your comment about looking like an old man with Boobs, I'm sure there are many many contemporary women who also look like old men with boobs. We can't all age like Cher or Sophia Loren.
Monica offers an important point of view. I think many of us CDs suffer from kind of a body dismorphia, comparing ourselves to the very best among us, or to real women (like Cher or Sophia Loren) and invariably come up short. We might be heavy, tall, old or whatever. It's all OK, and should not allow these perceptions to diminish our enjoyment (or the fantasy element) of this activity we share.
Last edited by Kris Burton; 02-15-2022 at 12:56 PM. Reason: wording
Monica's right, of course, and I think many of us older girls experience the same. But, hey... just like crossdressing, photography is a skill as well, and often just as difficult. If you think you can nail a decent photo in 1 or 2 shots, don't kid yourself. It's a craft, just as makeup is, and you'll have to take dozens/hundreds of photos to get just the right one you'll want to save for posterity. Playing with lighting in your photo can also shave years off of the subject.
I can also say that an "old man with boobs and a wig" without confidence in a photo is often a self-fulfilling prophecy. But adding confidence in your posture and smile ameliorates a lot of imagined defects. Just own it and kick your photos up a notch.
I'm the classic crossdresser in that I enjoy wearing the clothes, footwear and accessories. I also wear makeup but not very much and hardly ever wear a wig. And looking like a woman, acting like a woman, feeling like a woman, etc just doesn't come into it. And like yourself when I look in a mirror or at a photo I see a man wearing women's clothes. But that doesn't bother because it's all about the clothes. I arrived at this simple, common sense state of affairs several years ago and ever since don't beat myself with a big stick and do the psychoanalysis thing.
There have been a fair number of threads about camera versus mirror. The boiled down version is that unless you know what you are doing, photos can easily make you look worse (especially phone cameras with their tiny, distorting lenses.)
And if you are unhappy with your appearance, many times a change of wig to something that suits you better can work wonders! (Not to point fingers but I have seen far too many badly chosen wigs.)
I hear you loud and clear, but there?s no cure for CDing.
Speak for yourself, I look great! Great for an old guy in a dress, that is.
Seriously, I do think I look OK in a lot of outfits, but never do I look like a woman. I think I, and other guys, can look good in certain clothes marketed for women. Certainly not all outfits, and some look way better with the top filled out correctly, but we can look good even without looking like women.
I'm sure there are many in the vanilla world who would disagree with me, but since this is my opinion they're wrong.
Yes. You eventually just accept that facts, and still dress out and go about what you are doing, enjoying yourself!
This may be an obvious suggestion to everyone, but if you flip your photos so that they're mirrored, you might be a little happier with the results. We're so used to seeing our faces in the mirror that we become blind to the inevitable asymmetry that nearly every face has, and all that asymmetry seems amplified when we look at photo of ourselves.
But yeah, in 99 out of a 100 photos, I look awful. Save the best, delete the rest.
I'm sorry you feel that way. However, crossdressing is not a bug or disease. There is no vaccine to cure it. It is a behavior. Learned at a very young age and reinforced by feelings and circumstance over a long period of time. And although might be considered by some as undesirable it often serves a purpose. The human mind is very mysterious in its operation. Often a behavior is used as a way of compensating or coping. Until you discover what you're using it for and substituting another less troublesome behavior in its place you will never be rid of it.
You look in the mirror and you are disappointed because you don't see perfection. Ask any woman what they see when they look in the mirror. They don't see perfection either. They learn to accept the reflection.
Crossdressing is about feelings. What are you feeling? And why?
CANCER IS A BITCH SO YOU HAVE TO BE MORE OF A BITCH TO BEAT IT.
I had the same problem for many years. One thing that helped was I tried the Faceap. I gave it a picture of me in drab and asked it to make me look like a woman. What came out was a female version of me, minus a few wrinkles, that is recognizably female but not Angelina Jolie gorgeous. But I look around and there aren't many 66 year old women that look like Angelina Jolie. If I make reasonable choices with clothing and makeup I can look like any other not very young woman. Not gorgeous, but not scary ugly. My shoulders are too big and my butt's flat. Yeah, join the club.
Enjoy yourself Audrey! That's why we do this.
If I had, I would have stopped 20 years ago when this resurface and about ever time I dressed since then. I do not post those photos but I still have them. Lets me know how far I have come. But I still take a lot of guy in a dress photos. None of them will deter me from continuing. And I know I do not pass but when I go out in public I could care less. Anyone does not like it, that is their problem not mine.
So stop getting hung up over the photos! Most of us have them. Just keep progressing and enjoying what your doing.
Last edited by Karren H; 02-15-2022 at 03:19 PM.
I agree with Dawnmarrie its about the feelings. Like the song goes if it feels good do it.I know when I look in the mirror I am trying to make a silk purse out of a sows ear.However no matter how old I get. The look of pantyhose on my legs is the same as it was 47 years ago and so is the feeling.Its what you get out of it.
You can set up two mirrors at 90 degrees to each other just like some fitting rooms have. then you face the joint and you get the true you.
Or use your cell phone in Selfie mode.
Some cell phones has an automatic picture flipping tool/app. That way on your cell phone you see what another person sees. The right side of your picture is put on the left side and you see what others are seeing (minus the distortions/omissions/changes the viewer's mind makes). At times the human mind can be quite forgiving, or extremely cruelly selective about seeing what it wants to see.
I may never be the cutest girl in the club but I can be a girl in the club and I will take that. Saturday night at the beach club a cute 20 something gg came to me to say she had just told her husband she wanted to be like me when she got older. She wanted to still be having fun and wearing cute outfits!! Yeah I will take that.
Nope. I look like an old man with FAKE boobs and a wig.Originally Posted by audreyinalbany
Fortunately, I'm not trying to fool anyone. All I want to do is be comfortable in my own skin and in my own lingerie and dresses. I have no intentions of subjecting the public to Heather. I do guess if ever I had my wife's blessing, support, and help with makeup and we were out of town with less than a .001% chance of seeing anyone we knew, I might let Heather completely out in the open. But, that's unlikely to ever happen.
EDIT: I know there are a couple of older girls on this site; but, to all you 60 somethings, you are still young and vibrant to this 76 year old. All I think of when thinking about my age is I'm damn near 80!. I do, however, have an advantage over many. I happen to know I will live at least until age 88 which means I still have at least 12 years of cross dressing in my future. How do I know that? When we got married, I promised my wife 50 years. We've been married 38 years; so, I've got 12 to go AND I do not lie to her. That's this girl's story and she's sticking to it.
Last edited by Heather76; 02-15-2022 at 05:01 PM.
It's never too late to enjoy a happy childhood.
Live each day as though it's your last 'cause one day you'll be right.
I'm finding the more feminine side of me...and I ❤️ this adventure.
Aneline, you have basically just described me, my feelings, and my reaction to the results on FaceApp. I'm two years younger than you, but facing the same issues body-wise.
I to am seen as a "fake" woman.
Last edited by char GG; 02-15-2022 at 07:06 PM. Reason: Removed your pictures from someone else's thread
I have long since accepted that I have an old man's face. That hasn't stopped my longing for a feminine life.
I am a vessel of the goddess. Let me express my calling to a feminine life through nurturing love and relatedness.
So true. I have one photo I like. The mirror casts a positive image but that damn camera!!!
Yeah that camera, yuck lol. I think I still look okay in photos but one thing is for sure, I don't want a cure for dressing lol!
Yeah!!!! The camera does not lie. And yes I hate mirrors. I try to avoid the as much as possible.
I will stay with my dreams.
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