Hi

[JenniferZ2009]

Hi everyone. How are you doing today? Im having a hard time living with my transition at times. I would be accepted by society in my behavior would be correct again but I would loose my sense of self if I was to go back and stop my hormones and just everything.... Im extreamly tired right now so im sorry if my message is sucky.

[NjJamie]

Jennifer, thank you for sharing and showing that you feel comfortable enough on this forum to do so!

[mbmeen12]

Monday give call to your professional gender specialist consular. Consider a daily diary too. Always good as to monitor the influxes of feelings.

[Devi SM]

hi Jennifer, I'm sorry for what you're passing.
Can I ask, For how long have you been out of hormones?

[JenniferZ2009]

its not really out of hormones... Im on testosterone, estrogen and progesterone as part of a potential intersex gender treatment... I ran out of testosterone and did not get it refiled and found im doing better if I take my anxiety meds and such.... its been a few days and I am doing a lot better mentally right now.

[Aunt Kelly]

I'm glad to hear that you're feeling better. You case sounds a bit more complex than most we hear about here, at least from a medical point of view. Do get in touch with your caregiver, especially before considering changes to the regimen they've prescribed for you.

[DeniseNJ]

Jennifer I noticed feeling all too well on estrogen off estrogen I'm currently on for 4 months now. It's confusing but I guess in the way it calms me down. I haven't noticed many changes if any. So I know where you're coming from I'm on the transdermal patch a very low dose but I have estradiol tablets in the medicine cabinet. Our lives are very complicated I wish you luck

[Aunt Kelly]

Amen, Denise. I have had the same experience. Not by choice, mind you, but the supply of injectable estradiol in the U.S. is spotty, at best. We know that it's not a psychoactive drug, but the knowledge that it's there and doing its job is so important to me that not having it is... stressful.

[Ann Louise]

Hi Jennifer ~ I'm from just north of Seattle myself It's been almost 10 years now since I set out on my crossing of the stormy seas of transition, and over that time the character of our community has changed, the politics have changed, the laws have changed (and back again) and of course, I have changed, too. Those factors alone have made my transition a difficult, serious matter.

I consider myself as lucky in that I was able to comfortably migrate all the way over to the F side of the spectrum, but the intersex folks I know have not found the journey anywhere near as comfortable. Early on, yet after all the surgeries, I was quite concerned with sex and orgasm, and the guidance I had at the time recommended a regular small bit of testosterone to "restore" my ability to enjoy what (I thought) was a very important part of my life. After all, how could it really hurt me? But I might as well have invited a demon from hell home with me, and taken up drinking Everclear! lol Even though a low dose of a T cream was prescribed (and yes, I was able to orgasm), my anxiety, fear, and agression returned to at least my pre-GRS levels, if not more so. And, with an eye towards T as my culprit, I would note that even my old Rx for spiro, which reduced my GD dramatically, did not have the same effect as GRS, again pointing to the fact that even the very low amounts of T produced by spiro were still too much for me.

I would suggest that you may consider reducing T even more, or eliminating it completely in your quest for a stable transition environment. And the sex and orgasm thing? Well, all that works just fine now, too, even without a trace of the demon T. All the best to you, Ann