Am I doing the right thing?
I have a cousin who is over 80 years old and is very religious. She was a missionary in India for a large part of her life. Years ago I set her up with her first computer and we only communicated if she had a problem. In November last year I got her a new computer with windows 11. I have spent more time with her helping her with the new system and we have become closer. I rang her, one evening, and told her I wanted to talk to her about something that is unusual for a man and that was ladies fashion of the 40s to the 70s especially underwear. She laughed, at first, but we continued to have a great discussion about the topic and she told me what she wore in her early years. I mentioned to her that she was part of the reason I became interested in fashion. She was a teacher at my primary school and left to go to India. Her replacement teacher was young and this being the fifties wore the large petticoated skirts and dresses of the time. One day a gust of wind lifted her skirt and revealed her petticoats and I was totally hooked.
About a month later I told her that I had a collection of vintage underwear and ended up showing her a few girdles, slips and stockings which she enjoyed and we had a nice chat about her experiences with 50s underwear. I have not yet told her that I wear these clothes every day but I did reveal one of my fantasies. That was to wear a large ballgown with a hooped petticoat and all the trimmings. She wasn't shocked but was concerned. She stated that from a religious point of view she wouldn't approve but suggested that doing so might play with my mind. She was worried if I enjoyed the experience that I might end up wearing women's clothes at home. She also wondered if fantasy could also lead to obsession or even if there was a difference. I assured her that at my age my mind was very stable and I will remain the same person.
I will be wearing the ballgown soon and I wonder if I should tell her and maybe show her photos. I don't want to destroy our relationship and I do feel that even though she may disapprove she will not chase me away. She may suspect that I am wearing the clothes anyway. If she reacts favourably should I come clean? That is my dilemma.