This is the hardest post that I've ever had to make.

[Princess Chantal]

If I were you in that situation, I would contact the local LGBTQ resource centre and see if they could suggest any friendly karaoke events and other interests of mine. The resource centres are there for such purposes.

[docrobbysherry]

Kim, whenever I read a post like yours it grinds my gears! You're not doing anything to hurt anyone else so u should be able to live your life the way u like!
Of course, I realize that this is NOT always possible in real life!

However, thinking you'll stop dressing just because u stop going out as Kim is border line delusional!

[Erin Lafleur]

I can fully understand the fear of winding up in a hospital from using a restroom. I think it's a fear most of us have had at some point (if not many points).

Making up your mind 100% to do something can be a great strength. It can also be a great weakness. It's how you use such an ability that makes the difference. Using it to actively harm yourself isn't a good thing. I can't know what it inside you, but you're here on this forum because you felt a need to be here. Most, if not all of us, know that crossdressing is something inherent to us. It doesn't go away. It's always there, always part of us. Trying to deny it is very, very likely to be mentally unhealthy. It might work for a while, but eventually it will fail. This ultimately is a form of self abuse.

For me, what you're suggesting wouldn't be a solution at all. I would be angry at the thought of allowing myself to have my life dictated by people I've never even met. It's your life. Live it. Take counsel of your fears, but don't let others control you. Come up with other ways to express your femininity that do not involve having to decide which restroom to use. You can solve this. Quitting cold turkey isn't a solution at all. It's just pushing the problem down the road for your future self to contend with, and the results may not be pretty.

I concur with Julie's assessment 100%, well said.
Personally, I'd be damned if I would allow people I don't know or care about dictate what makes me happy. Not in a million years...

[alwayshave]

Kimberly, I am sorry to hear that you are considering this. You can always just dress at home. I realize that is not optimal, but it is an option.

[NancyJ]

Agree with TAG. I do not understand why you would need to stop crossdressing if you can not crossdress and safely go to a bar. Many, maybe most of us, have never been in a bar crossdresser. If I had to choose between dressing En femme or going to a bar, we?ll?

[MistyCD]

I have had two bad experiences since I have been going out. The first time I didn't leave the house for two years after it happened. The second one set me back six months. Now, I don't let them stop me.
For all you Mississippi girls ya'll need to come down to the Gulfcoast.

Or come on up to the New Jersey/New York area where nobody really cares how you dress.

[RachelB.]

Memphis and Southaven MS are just an hour or so up I-22. Not any further than Jackson was from where you used to live. There are lots of LBGTQ bars and most any bar would be accepting. Just stay out of what we used to call "beer joints". They attract rednecks like a flame attracts moths. There used to be some friendly restaurants and bars in Tupelo (15 or 20 years ago). I have been out dressed in Tupelo. You might try Coilumbus or Starkville. Both are college towns and tend to be more accepting.

[Stephanie47]

I understand your angst. One bad encounter can and will set somebody back. It's one thing to get some verbal abuse walking down the street; it's another to have a confrontation in a confined space. I'm a home-body and not just within my cross dressing needs. It's my nature.

I "Google" buzz word combination for Mississippi are there seems to be a lot of activities and events. They may not be the bar scene, but there are outlets for self expression. There is always the risk that your cross-dressing will become known to family or friends or co-workers; car accident? Assaulted?

[NonbiNancy]

Kimberly, there's nothing I could add to all the wonderful advise and support the gals here have already offered. All I can do is reiterate that there are many ways to express our gender identity and share that quitting did not work for me. CD came back and I'm so glad that it did!

[sometimes_miss]

Its very unfortunate that you had to experience that but maybe it's a bit precipitous to quite (or attempt to quit) something so ingrained because of one negative interaction.

Having lived through an entire childhood of being beaten up on a pretty regular basis, it doesn't take much to spike a memory of that, and the reluctance of doing anything that might bring it upon us again. As an adult, there is no realistic way to stop the harassment from people who hate us, other then moving away. 'Restraining orders' only tend to cause after the fact punishment for those who disobey them; not preventing it from happening.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Kim , You have to do what whap you need to do,

Just don't Purge right away, Put everything in storage for a Year, >Orchid**OO**

[Debbie Denier]

Kimberley, If I was you I would pause, reflect and take some time out. I also have put Debbie on hiatus as there is just not the time or opportunities. I would try to find another venue. I don?t know Tupelo except for the Van Morrison song Tupelo Honey but have heard of the reputation of the American South. Take care, come back determined and better.

[Kimberly A.]

Thank you all SO much for all the kind words and support, I really appreciate it and it means a lot! I'm not going to reply to all individually, cause there's just so many. LOL

But, I will say this..... I'm gonna make a separate post about it, but I did go to the same bar last night in drab. That same woman was there, not sure if she recognized me or not, but I'm pretty sure she did.

Anyway with that said, I've seen a lot of you say that CD'ing isn't a choice, it's a lifestyle. Well cool, it may be for most of y'all here, but it isn't for me. For me, CD'ing IS more of just a hobby, because I can't do it near as often as most of you and not near as often as I'd like. Yes, I have a very strong feminine side as I've said here on more than one occasion and I have chosen a feminine name for her, obviously. But still, CD'ing is a hobby for me and I CAN quit doing it and never go back to it, IF I need to or want to. And as I've said, it would be extremely difficult, but NOT impossible.

Now, I think I'm done talking about this, I'mma go make that post. LOL

[SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

Hi Orchid. Nah, I'm not gonna purge cause I've spent WAY too much money on all of it! LOL

[Nicci]

Sometimes dressing at home is all you need

[abby054]

It has been my observation from many years as a commander in the Army and as a leader and manager in civilian life that giving up going to bars is more likely rid you of the trouble that you describe than giving up crossdressing.

[Sallee]

Well Kimberly I know we here at crossdressers.com will support you in whatever your choice, i but my guess is CDing will rear its made up gorgeous head again and maybe you can resist maybe not I do wish you lots of luck in quitting. I would like to say I have quit but I won't because when the opportunity arises I'm in a dress and that isn't very often When I dress it is to blend and I will go where the CDs go, The Mall. Fortunately I live in Calif. and no one really cares and there are bars where CDs go, me too. So I will keep dressing when the opportunity presents. My wife knows and would prefer I didn't. At one time she was quite accepting and almost encouraging but those days are gone.
I would say store your stash for awhile, it will save you money. You seem like you really enjoy your cd time so just try to keep it in perspective with the rest of your life. I know it can get carried away with cding very easily but there are lots of other things in life besides women's clothing, just don't know how much fun they are compared to CDing.

[sabrinaedwards]

I have tried many times to quit CDing, but I always return to what I love. In terms of restrooms, I have never had an issue. I live in SC and always use the restroom that fits my attire. I have used Walmart, McDonalds, and various bars without incident. I was in a gay bar and the bartender said that they do not discriminate against straight patrons; I used the ladies bathroom while dressed as a female. I did dance with a number guys; they knew I was CD.
Love, Sabrina