Just a note to say how lucky and grateful I am.
My wife got me not one, but two gold necklaces. I had mentioned to her that I'd like a gold necklace, since most of mine are silver. She also got me some travel-sized shaving gel, since she knows I have an upcoming train trip en femme. Of course I got some non-CD-related gifts as well.
My 9-year-old nonbinary grandkid got me a pair of earrings (I'll need to get my ears pierced before I can wear them, but I'm taking them as an incentive). My daughter got me a nice headband to keep my now longer hair out of my face when doing makeup. I have not dressed over the holidays so far for assorted reasons -- I could have dressed for Christmas Eve dinner at our house or Christmas morning breakfast at my daughter's house, but honestly, I didn't want to make either meal about me. They would have been fine with it, though. We have had my daughter's family over for dinner with me dressed. My grandchild is biologically male, but currently presents 100% female. She makes a very cute girl, but I tell people she's "a boy in a girl suit", because she has a lot of stereotypical rambunctious little boy behavior). She has said she was nonbinary since he was 6 years old, and wants us use male and female pronouns alternately, which we're happy to do.
Thursday we're meeting a couple of close friends (two women who are partners) for lunch and drinks at a pop-up Christmas bar. I'll be dressed in my new green corduroy skirt. Joanie has been out with them before.
It's really nice to be completely out to my immediate family and close friends. For those of you who are fearful -- don't give up hope. I was in the closet for 35 years, but when I came out to my wife she turned out to be incredibly supportive. She has a few boundaries -- we don't go to some of our favorite restaurants with me in Joanie mode, for instance -- but we have been out together so many times I've lost count -- errands, lunch, dinners, drinks, shopping, etc etc. It's gotten to the point where she says she forgets I'm crossdressed -- she says she just thinks of me as wearing MY clothes.
There's always another hill to climb, though. I am not out to my siblings, or their children. We are very close to one nephew and his wife, and I will probably come out to them in the next few months. They live about 90 minutes away, and we get together regularly. For some reason, it seems harder to come out to my two brothers and my sister.
Love and peace to all for the holidays,
Joanie
I really like your comment about viewing the way you dress as just wearing your clothes. That is very much the way it is. You are just being you in the most genuine and honest way. Your wife's boundaries are very reasonable and sensible. I don't know much about coming out to siblings as I am an only child, but I suspect it is a matter of feeling that coming out you are violating long standing expectations between you and your siblings. But there is a special love that exists between all of you that can outweigh the sense of violation. Caution is appropriate but trusting is as well.
