She remembered when I told her

[Maria 60]

We celebrated our 39th wedding anniversary a few weeks back and my wife reminded me it was probably about this week 39 years ago that I dropped the bomb and told her about my little hobby. She asked me what came over me to tell her when I did. I told her I thought once married it would just go away, not having time to myself and I just thought I was going to change. We took a three week honeymoon and the first chance I got I didn't hesitate at all. I told my wife when we got back I still had a few more days off then her, when she went to work the first morning and I seen her pantyhose on the dresser without a second thought I put them on. I stood in front of the mirror disgusted in myself. I told her I sat on the edge of the bed for four hours wearing her pantyhose and confused and thinking and trying to figure out my next step. I didn't want to make anymore broken promises to myself that it would only be this one time and that's it, so I decided to come clean and as soon as possible in which I did it that same night. I told her because she is a traditional Italian girl I thought she was going to go running back to her mother. I explained I wasn't going to be a prisoner to this anymore but the sad part was I knew there was a better chance then less that I was probably going to lose the love of my life, but I knew a promise that I wouldn't do it again would only be a lie.
I told her I was very surprised at her reaction that she was upset that I didn't tell her before but almost more concerned if I was gay or wanted to transform.
I then told her I don't like to dwell on things and push my boundaries but I always wanted to ask how she felt when I told her.
She told me she was upset that I told her after we were married and thought after dating someone for six years one would know someone. I caught her off guard but she knew me that I was big hearted person and thought it was a more kinky or sexual thing and decided to see where it was going.
The part she told me that she was very surprised and flattered that I never told anyone else and that she was the only person I shared this with. She also seen how embarrassed and how hard it was for me to come clean about telling her the first time I remembered putting on my sisters pantyhose up to that same morning I put on hers. She told me she had this feeling that if I was able to tell her this that I would be able to tell her anything. With no internet and with really not wanting to talk to her sisters or friends she decided to go blind and see where it was going but she definitely didn't want me wearing and stretching her things. She told me even though it wasn't the smoothest roads at times especially when I didn't get some fem time I would get very sucky and a little aggressive but all around she believes we have a strong bonded relationship because of this. She started seeing some positives when women friends of her would complain that there husbands don't do anything with them and wondered how she would get me to come clothes shopping with her and spent so much time together.
Again she showed me concern if for whatever reason I may get caught she believes I won't handle it well mentally and that's why as much as she would love to watch me flourish she also watches over me knowing me so well on not handling curtain situations.
The bottom line was she was upset of when I told her but she did understand how hard it must have been to tell her and respected she was the only one I trusted with this life long secret and believes we have a strong relationship because of it.
I didn't mention on our anniversary we went out for dinner and she bought me two bracelets, one with a blue heart and one with a pink heart.
I can't explain how nice it is to have this open communication and it felt good after all these years to finally hear her side how she felt and her feelings of when I told her. I could only hope for many more years with her but we all know life changes fast so I try to charish every moment.
Sorry it was little long, there was a lot more said but I thought I would point out curtain things but I just wanted to share.

[alwayshave]

Maria, I have said it before, you are a lucky girl having such a supporting wife. I remember thinking that getting married would end my need to dress. It never works that way.

[Mercedes]

Congrats on 39 years together and being in such a supportive relationship. I got a little verklepmt reading about the blue and pink bracelet, what a thoughtful gift. You are a lucky girl.

[Traci H]

I thought getting married would put those desires all behind me too. Young and full of excitement for married life, the thought that crossdressing would come back to bite me, never entered my mind. Had a group like this been available at the time, I might have known it would it go away and warned my future wife.

Maria, I?m glad it has been working for you. The give of a bracelet says a lot a lot. What a gift! So happy for you. Gives me some hope.

I?m beyond you in years of marriage and still trying to figure it all out, without crashing things down. A work in progress for many many years.

[chrissy111]

Maria I'm very happy for you, having a supportive wife is every thing we could ask for.

[Stephanie47]

I always look forward to your posts of acceptance. I suppose many of us fall into what women call is "lying by omission" of a critical piece of information. I suppose we would never experience what a woman feels upon such an admission. But, I suppose they would never know the torment we may experience carrying that secret, especially in the 1960's and 1970's. When my wife and I were married I had not worn any of my mother's clothes for many years, and I had just been to Vietnam as an infantryman doing all those "manly" things. It's a funny thing that such feelings arise after many years of inactivity.

[bridget thronton]

Always read your posts. You two are made for each other.