Why not?

[Rochal Tukque]

Well really WHY NOT! This question is the truly the basest of our being and is something that everyone one on this site has had to answer or ask themselves. WHY NOT? Why can?t I dress the way I want too? I?ll stick to what?s on my plate. I don?t particularly like the confines of what society seems to feel that is the order of things. Especially the CINO?s Christians in name only. Seems the teachings of the one they follow are long forgotten. Anyway like Bea I?m an androgynous dresser, what I?m comfortable in. To me has become a game of cat and mouse. Pushing the edge of safety and blending in for my own freedom. There?s a 100 reasons for Why Don?t and only one for WHY NOT I?m not going to live out a miserable existence to appease someone?s warped sense of mythological, outdated, unjustified order. They don?t for me.
Hugs Rochal

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

I've complained many time, both on here and to my wife, that while society will allow women to wear pretty much anything they want, men are constricted to certain norms. Yeah, we can wear colorful shirts, but nothing with spaghetti straps, nothing too scoopy, no skirts or dresses, no leggings or hose, only certain sandals, shorts can't be too short, etc.

I know there are a few on here ignoring those boundaries but for many of us there would be social consequences if we were to join in.

[Maria 60]

Where to begin. I have stated to you many times that I applaud your confidence and courage and respect your "I want to do what I want and don't care what anyone thinks" attitude. Believe it or not I'm seeing more and more men just wearing skirts and not trying to look like women. Do they get weird looks, probably but the men I seen I could see they just don't care and own the situation. That's the difference, you have to believe what your doing is what you want and don't care.
I went to a function and a man next to me took off his suit jacket and tie. He was wearing a pearl necklace and what looked like a under shirt with lace on top, almost like a camisole. When he left the table everyone at the table made a comment but at the end of the day he pretty much presented himself the way he wanted and didn't care what others thought. He didn't look at us when he took his jacket off to see our reaction and I didn't notice any signs of him hiding it and him and his wife just acted normal. That's what I'm talking about, the freedom to do what you want. That's what I want, I want to go into a shoe store and try on male shoes showing my pantyhose feet, or go try on a suit and jacket and my bra is showing under my shirt. Not the thing of presenting as a women but to wear what makes me feel good and what I enjoy wearing. Not trying to make any statement, just wearing what makes me feel happy. Again I applaud you for what I believe you are doing what I would love to get the confidence and courage and not care about what others think. Cheers

[Amelie]

This is not an insult but the reason most guys can't dress the way they want is cause they are old.

Look at the young kids in college. Quite a few can dress any way they want. They have this freedom the older people want.

What I am trying to say is most cds who want to go out dressed do so at an older age. They want this freedom after they made most their life's decisions. They get a nice job, build up friendships, get married, have 2.5 children and move to the suburbs. After quite a few years they now want the freedom to dress the way they want. This rocks the boat.

I am not perfect, not by a long shot. But I started to dress the way I wanted from my teen years. I made friends with people that knew how I dressed. I got work where I wasn't stigmatized for who I was. I never married, never had kids. Maybe the one part that was rough was with the family. It upset mom and dad, the rest of the family I didn't care.

I just think if one builds up a certain life style, it's rough to make a drastic change in life like wanting to wear women's clothes. It's not the wearing of clothes that's tough but it's the change that makes things tough.

[Rochal Tukque]

Can?t dress cause I?m OLD. Ha ha I?m 70 and this has been the best time in my life to dress. Quite frankly I?m better dressed than most the women in town wearing their shabby tee shirts and baggy sweatpants. Every thing I wear has a purpose. Born intersexed I have boobs and they bounce, don?t particularly like the nipples rubbing the shirt especially when it?s cold. So I live in shelf bra camis. I don?t have a banana to hide so tights and leggings are very comfortable. Especially the high waisted compression yoga tights that keeps the lower six collapsed vertebrae?s in my back from killing me. If I wore a pair of hard waisted jeans riding on good old L3 I can kiss off walking in about an hour. Thank GOD for girl clothes. Since I?m setting in the middle of the fence I?m just now really enjoying life dressing there. Wasted too many years hiding in the so-call society order of things. Besides OLD crossdressers do it with class the kids are still learning. LOL
Hugs Rochal

[Amelie]

I never said all cds are old. or being old is the cause of not being able to dress.


If one reads the posts on the forum most cds come out or want to come out dressed as a woman at an older age. After they created a life style of living as a man with men's clothes and such. it's not the being old that is the problem. The problem is expecting others, like family, friends and employment to understand why the need for wearing women's clothes is important. If a cd came out wearing women's clothes at a young age then people around them would know from the start who they are. there is no surprise as it would be if a cd came out at a later age.

I only make my post on the comments and life struggles some make on this forum. Read old posts and one will see quite a few cds come out late in life after building up a family and friendships. Some cds can dress the way they want but most on this forum complain that it's unfair that they are unable to dress the way they want. And I think it's cause they came out late in life, in other words they are old.

[Rochal Tukque]

Don?t worry Amelie, I truly didn?t take offense. I completely understand the struggle at every age. Coming out or hiding takes a toll on one?s mental health and life. Many times the losses are far more than the gains. It?s to bad that the programming and the lies have so damaged the thinking of society in general. It just shouldn?t be that big of a deal.
Hugs Rochal

[Amelie]

I agree Rochal.

Another factor could be where one grew up or where one lives now. I think it would be more difficult to come out dressed in Alabama then it would in NY. I was lucky growing up in NYC, although not totally tolerant in the 70's and 80's had areas that was safe to live. Parts of Manhattan like the West Village and even the East Village where I lived for awhile one could live the way they wanted in relative safety. Just the usual crime one had to put up with.

It's just a shame in 2025 soon to be 2026 that we still live in fear on how to live our lives. We should have learned from the 1960's hippies on how to live our lives. They knew.