How can it be dishonest when you are only expressing your "true" self??
How can it be dishonest when you are only expressing your "true" self??
[SIZE="2"]"Tell me why I can't where a mini 'kilt' to work?"[/SIZE][SIZE="3"][/SIZE]
If that works for you, and brings you happiness, that's wonderful. But for transgendered people like me, that just does'nt work. And we are NOT dishonest. There's a part of me that IS female. I didn't ask for it, but there it is. As a guy, I could no more walk around in a skirt than naked, and feel comfortable. As a girl, I am a girl. I feel female, and act and dress accordingly. Whether or not I am passing, well, that is for another thread, and is irrelevant, truthfully. Having two genders inside you may be inconvenient, alot of work, and a general pain in the butt sometimes. But it's real. Can't tell me it's not. And what is real cannot be dishonest. Finding the courage to be who you are, despite all the STUFF to put up with, is exceedingly honest.Originally Posted by Butterfly Bill
Hugs,
Melissa
What's the point of instruments, words are a sawed off shotgun-Radiohead
http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/melissa.c.keiper
Ugh. I wish this thread would just die. I was angry in the first place for him starting it because from the very beginning it was a 'sobe is so horrible' brigade.
Ya know, I'm not as horrible as you all may think.
And I don't think that 'Leah' wanting to show his girly side is dishonest. Nor do I care whether or not strangers are fooled.
My concerns are on a relationship level between me and my boyfriend. They have nothing to do with any of you or of strangers. This is something that we have to work out ourselves.
If 'everyone is different' than you all shouldn't be so compelled to hate on me.
Sobe
Honey, I, for one, don't hate ya! Heck, if ya read my post, I wasn't even answering you directly, as I quoted another post.
Sorry, don't mean to get all defensive and self indulgent. But I guess I just did! Ya should know, though, that I understand what you're saying. Best of luck to ya both.
Hugs,
Melissa
What's the point of instruments, words are a sawed off shotgun-Radiohead
http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/melissa.c.keiper
Honey, I, for one, don't hate ya! Heck, if ya read my post, I wasn't even answering you directly, as I quoted another post.
Sorry, don't mean to get all defensive and self indulgent. But I guess I just did! Ya should know, though, that I understand what you're saying. Best of luck to ya both.
Hugs,
Melissa
Yeah I know your post wasn't directed at me. I was more saying to everyone what I feel. This thread is boiling over with negativity toward me. At least it feels that way.
But thanks for being nice, Melissa.
I suppose I should clear the air here, since I went and made this a board issue. I think a lot of you have gotten the wrong impression of Sobe.
I posted this thread after we had had an argument (bad idea, I know), and it wasn't fair to her to bring it here. My intention was to try to get her to understand where I was coming from on this issue, that I felt that even if crossdressing is deceptive, that is is honest on some level. What I didn't intend was for this to be a pile-on Sobe.
CD philosophies aside, she's supportive, and she loves me, and she's going through hell to be with me. We've had our whole lives to sort out crossdressing, and most of us still struggle with it. Sobe's had six months. Six months to learn what it means to be Trans, to be with a Transy, to learm what gender is, and what it means to her and to our relationship, and to relationships in general when one body shares two genders. She's a goddamn hero. She's frustrating sometimes, and prone to say things we might find offensive without actually meaning to (like calling CDing greedy; She admits that the word "greed" implies a concept that she didn't intend), but I still love her (and so should you! Or else.)
it takes tremendous courage to be whole.If that works for you, and brings you happiness, that's wonderful. But for transgendered people like me, that just does'nt work. And we are NOT dishonest. There's a part of me that IS female. I didn't ask for it, but there it is. As a guy, I could no more walk around in a skirt than naked, and feel comfortable. As a girl, I am a girl. I feel female, and act and dress accordingly. Whether or not I am passing, well, that is for another thread, and is irrelevant, truthfully. Having two genders inside you may be inconvenient, alot of work, and a general pain in the butt sometimes. But it's real. Can't tell me it's not. And what is real cannot be dishonest. Finding the courage to be who you are, despite all the STUFF to put up with, is exceedingly honest.
Hugs,
Melissa
Sobe, I certainly do not hate you! You are learning and that learning curve is so steep. I really do feel for you.
Louise.
I have a few frivolous, serious and philosophical opinions on the various topics posted on this thread. I will hold on to those for another time.
One of the cardinal rules in any relationship is that communication is sacred. When the communication becomes a debate and the rules change from rules of communication to rules of debate, the relationship factor gets lost. When you take the debate to a public forum such as this without both parties in agreement to take that step (and sometimes even if they do agree to take that step) someone is very likely going to get hurt. In the context of this thread, Sobe has some perfectly valid opinions in the context of their original discussion (argument). Aired here without that original context, we debate something else, and given the makeup (sic) of this forum that debate is lopsided.
SoBe's hurt is very rational and reasonable. The original (private) context of their discussion was lost to her.:frustrated:
Carin
I have gone on a journey in search if myself. If you find me before I return, please hold on to me until I get back.
Telling our Children
I want to be sure and say that I do not hate anyone at all.
Hugs all round, to those I agree with and those I do not.
What you did was selfish, bringing a private arguement onto the board is just below the belt and I will not let this discussion go on any longer. You've hurt sobe, you should be ashamed of how she feels now :mad: :mad:
Administrator
Missing my Libra babe Sherlyn, I hope she's rocking up there with the angels
Missing our Rianna, doesn't seem right, gone to early, hope she's partying with Sherlyn
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