I give up... LOL
I give up... LOL
Don't give up now. You were doing so well. No matter what the reason you want to dresses or pants, if there is an so we should be honest about it. Both parrties end up getting hurt and things can escalate to a point where they never should. Some articles have said to ease into this if the partner is willing to try to be understanding and let them get used to it. Makes sense to me. True love is hard to find these days and our so's are willing to put forth the effort then respecting their feelings is really worth taking into consideration. I really hope you two can find a compromise that you both can live with. Just my two cents worth.
telling the truth
Well this is a tough thing to do. I have been married twice and if I had told either one that I was a CD they would not have been receptive like my gf now. You have to feel a person out and ask vague question leading up to your telling but hold back till you know you could really trust her. Some women can not be trusted and just like cheating they will find the best lawyer and bring out things just to embarass you. But if you do have someone who will accept you, then you are blessed. I have a close friend who is a lawyer and does divorces and when women are cheated or betrayed they can do some damage. raye
Unfortunately your logic isn't quite... well... logical. Tell me this, what would happen if I went to work with a denim manly skirt? Do believe no one would look twice? Do you believe coworkers would act like it's no big deal? I hear so many times GG say, " It's different when I do it " See, I don't try to be a women, or look like a women.Originally Posted by JudeGG
As someone trapped in fashion hell and who likes to be flashy, it's a very difficult world to live in.
Women who wear pants and skirts are shocked, just shocked a husband would do the same thing.
Not to go completely off the tracks but it has been brought up in this post a few times:
The whole women are not emulating men by wearing pants in the same way that men are emulating women when they CD is interesting. The fact that women do (and that society expects them to) emulate men is brought up in a number of feminism books and discussions. In the widely accepted quest for equality women have taken on traits that are applauded in men (There are lots of sources that talk about this …. Its really boring Sociology 101 stuff). As a result of this it is much more common (or acceptable) for a girl to have a name that at one point was traditionally associated with a male or to play with male toys etc. This will probably not be the case in the future. Men are now taking on more traditionally feminine traits (better communication, more nurturing etc). It will be more acceptable for the little boy to play with my little ponies (I still remember the looks I got when I was young). I was reading an article about how this mixing of roles is making us better parents but making relationships harder.
What it comes down to is trying to make things *fair* will get you nowhere. If you are constantly looking for things that are not equal in your relationship with other people you will end up being a sad person.
Wow I bet that was boring to read through ;P
Of course, you're 100% right on, Michelle. Honesty IS the best policy, especially in relationships. But try telling that to a young cd, in his 20s, who is VERY much in the closet, still somewhat ashamed of his need to dress, who meets "the one". So of course, he tells himself all he needs is true love and he can leave this silly dressing stuff in his rear-view mirror forever only to find out, a few years after marriage that he "is who he is" and now he's stuck- afraid to tell her but also can't get the girl in him out of his mind. Yeah, it is great to be honest, and I hope more young cds take the lessons of us ancient ones to heart. But there are alot of reasons why that honesty doesn't always happen: Immaturity, ego, denial, and of course FEAR, to name only a few. Your'e doing a great service in bringing it up, cause I don't think it can be stressed enough. But it can be hard, especially when you're younger.
Hugs,
Melissa
What's the point of instruments, words are a sawed off shotgun-Radiohead
http://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/melissa.c.keiper
Don't give up Hon. The hell with that. I value your thoughts and opinions just as much as anyone else's here. We don't always agree but how do we know how others feel if they don't tell us? You just keep right on posting your feelings, Hon. I appreciate them for sure.Sal
first date (or before) the people I meet will know; always an advocate of the TRUTH
peace
feather
[SIZE=3]Karren, I've always enjoyed your posts... up to now. How sad that you feel that this post is all about sucking up to all the GG's on this forum. I suppose that if your wife were lying and cheating on you that you would be just fine with that! NO???? Well then let me point out that whether your wife is accepting or not, honesty is always the best policy. And what it all boils down to is that that is all we are asking for. Honesty.
[SIZE=4]Country Girl GG
[SIZE=3]The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it."[/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][/SIZE]
[SIZE=4]When you find something good... Grab it with both hands and do all you can do to keep it![/SIZE]
Honesty, ya, I would have liked to have gotten that from my soon-to-be x-wife.
After 4 years of her cheating and lying, now she's at least honest about her latest man. He's a manly man, no problems with his sexuality. Funny thing, my CDing is one of the things that attracted her to me when we started seeing each other about 7 years ago, now she wants a manly man. Such is life.
"I see your true colors shining through, your true colors, and that's why I love you,
so don't be afraid to let them show, your true colors, true colors are beautiful, like a rainbow"
"Without change,something sleeps deep inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken!"[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I will always believe that honesty about who you are is the only way to go in a relationship. When my ex in 1979 said she wanted to find a "real man" and wanted a divorce if I could not give up the dressing., I walked out the door and the divorce was final 6 months later. 5 years after my marriage to my loving wife, Peggy, my ex told me that she had met many "manly" men but came to realize that she had the best man - even if he enjoyed being a woman sometimes. She died suddenly at age 48 2 weeks after that talk.
I love being "gender gifted"! www.pmpub.com
[SIZE=3]Karren, I've always enjoyed your posts... up to now. How sad that you feel that this post is all about sucking up to all the GG's on this forum. I suppose that if your wife were lying and cheating on you that you would be just fine with that! NO???? Well then let me point out that whether your wife is accepting or not, honesty is always the best policy. And what it all boils down to is that that is all we are asking for. Honesty.
is what we are looking for, for sure. It really is the bedrock of any real relationship, IMO.
Louise.
on this one. The music might be different but the honesty is still worth the change in rythym.
Louise.
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