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Thread: Closet dressers, how many of u r truly FREE TO DRESS whenever u like?

  1. #26
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Currently dress whenever I'm home. I come home, the boy clothes come off, shower, live as a girl until I have to go out. I buy my Cosmo, Glamour, Seventeen, etc., once a month, and toss the old stuff out. I tend to read a lot of the beauty/fashion forums; it's quite interesting, to read a girl's point of view, I've learned a lot over the years.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  2. #27
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    My wife has no problem with my dressing and I can do as much of it as I want to ... in the confines of our home or when in a motel.

  3. #28
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
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    I'm another with an understanding wife, and no kids in the house, so I dress pretty much as I please, except when I need to go to town, and I don't answer the door if you didn't call and let me know you where coming, so no surprise visitors.

  4. #29
    Breakin' social taboos TGMarla's Avatar
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    The fact that we're "closet" crossdressers kind of suggests by default that we are not at liberty to dress whenever we like. However, when there is any kind of prolonged "alone" time, out come the girly things!

    Any money found in the laundry is MINE!


    "This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"

    www.flickr.com/photos/tgmarla/

  5. #30
    One Perky Goth Gurl Pythos's Avatar
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    I am coflicted with this thread. I am seeing and reading too much hiding from family members, that in some cases are lucky to be able to live under your roof (daughters, sons). This is one of the main problems. Why are you hiding from something that should love you unconditionally.

    Now the reason for the conflict. I hide my skirt, hose and heels wearing from my mother. But then again, if I wear a nice shirt just because I wanted I am asked 20 questions and viewed suspiciously. LOL. So in many respects I am no different than you all that hide.

    I pray I find a female that loves me, and I love her, and she loves my little quirk.

  6. #31
    happy being me! KylieQ's Avatar
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    Lived alone for the last 9 years and free to dress whenever I want as no one really ever comes over and my family always calls before stopping by, so I have time to put things away beforehand. Apart from at home I tend to dress fully male for school (not willing to risk anything in the department) and either underdress or wear panties, girl jeans, and tights most everywhere else. At least that's the way things have been lately. I still haven't made it out fully dressed, but it's on the short list of things to do in the future!

  7. #32
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Ha ha! Good one, Pythos!

    U OBVIOUSLY don't have children! There's NO WAY for me to list all the things that COULD happen should my kids discover my CDing!
    But, I can assure u, 99% of them r NOT GOOD!

    Quote Originally Posted by Pythos View Post
    I am conflicted with this thread. I am seeing and reading too much hiding from family members, that in some cases are lucky to be able to live under your roof (daughters, sons). This is one of the main problems. Why are you hiding from something that should love you unconditionally.
    If u want: love, hate, ups and downs, anxious nites, extreme happiness, followed by hurt feelings and disappointments, have children!

    If u want "unconditional love", watch Leave it to Beaver, or get a puppy!

    Anyway, that's what I've found in MY many years on this planet!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  8. #33
    abbyleigh
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    I'm long time divorced living by my self and free to dress so there is no valid reason to be in the closet. Come on out of the closet...

  9. #34
    Aspiring Member Chiana's Avatar
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    Living alone does have some advantages at least it gives me the opportunity to dress whenever I want. But another nice thing about it is that I don't have to hide every thing and can actually leave my girlie things out in plain view in my house.
    Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right.

  10. #35
    eluuzion eluuzion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    U OBVIOUSLY don't have children! There's NO WAY for me to list all the things that COULD happen should my kids discover my CDing!
    But, I can assure u, 99% of them r NOT GOOD!

    If u want: love, hate, ups and downs, anxious nites, extreme happiness, followed by hurt feelings and disappointments, have children!

    If u want "unconditional love", watch Leave it to Beaver, or get a puppy!

    Anyway, that's what I've found in MY many years on this planet!
    LMAO! Well put doc! It is one thing to be a parent. It's an entirely different thing to be a responsible parent, lol.
    Technology does help when you share custody...GPS vehicle trackers being my favorite, hehehe. (Particularly when the 3 days a week custody drafted when my daughter was 2 yrs old, has now gradually age appropriately self-modified itself into dinner once a week...if I am lucky.

    Yo, Pythos, regarding that "hiding from those who should love you unconditionally thought"... That's a great point, in an ideal world...Unfortunately, that decision in my real world...has potential consequences such as providing fuel for a golddigging "ex" to blow the wheels off of many different carts in a shared custody arrangement. She has a consistent track record from day one...proving her agenda.

    My situation does not require any "sacrifices" specific to my relationship with "family" members. So there is nothing to be gained by disclosing my private interests. So I agree with doc's 99% negative outcomes of disclosure.

    As a general rule, I do not try to fix things that are not broken...(computers being the exception, of course, lol).

    Also wanted to add the point that my extensive "privacy" set-up at home would be the same with or without CD being part of my life. I just feel it is necessary to maintain privacy in these times. Also, I had 3 roommates my first year of college. I have never had a roommate since...just does not work for me...
    Last edited by eluuzion; 11-08-2010 at 02:38 AM.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  11. #36
    Always be happy Mistybtm's Avatar
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    I am completely free to dress whenever I like at home, And I am usually dressed every day. I live alone and do not have drop ins, All my friends know to call first before they come over plus you have to get pass the gate to the Apt complex and the only way to do that is use a gate code which calls my cell-phone allowing me to let you in. And if I do not know you are coming I will not open it. Not to be rude just for security because anyone can come to the gate an randomly call a code.
    Mistybtm

  12. #37
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    I wear skirts and dresses in the house all the time as I live alone. If anyone is coming over they call. Outside I wear jeans and tops or shorts and tops depending on the season. My favorite indoor outfit is a chemise.

  13. #38
    Love Lipstick & Heels AllThingsPretty's Avatar
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    I am married to a very understanding woman who also is very supportive, She understands my desires to dress and never Say's anything negative when I do. Which for the last year or so has been every day. I do not have to hide any of my things from her, We share a huge walk in closet and its got more of my girlie things in it then hers. I can go out dressed anytime I want to, and with her blessing, she hates society's stigmas as much as I do, But I live in a very small redneck town and my business would suffer tremendously if I do go out on the town, So I chose to stay in the sanctuary of my own home.

    Are daughter knows that I dress and is also accepting (she is out of the house now) but I try not to dress in her presence when I know that she is coming over. Its not because I am embarrassed to be dressed around her, but I do not want to make her feel uncomfortable around me (her dad). Most of the time she comes by is because she needs some fatherly advice and it is hard for me to mentally do when dressed.

  14. #39
    Super Moderator DAVIDA's Avatar
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    Well, I guess that my closet has gotten a lot larger over the years! I dress every day while I am at home.
    Jaen has known about me since before we were married.(which will be 20 years this December 22nd) The second person to ever know and see me dressed was her daughter.(She is mine also. I usually don't differentiate between step and not)
    Since the years have gone by, I have told numerouse people. My mother, sisters, friends, a niece, ect.
    I used to do the hallway dash while changing clothes on the way. Now, I just open the door.
    Friends know that I will most likely be dressed as a female.
    Looking back on things, I have not lost a single friend when they found out.
    One friend was actually pissed at me because I didn't tell him a lot earlier.
    It sounds like some of the problems that come up when an SO finds out and gets mad because of the deception.

  15. #40
    Aspiring Member Amanda22's Avatar
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    I'm extremely fortunate to dress whenever I want, thanks to my extraordinary wife who is far beyond tolerating or accepting, but actually encouraging. My life is a dream come true.

  16. #41
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    I,m free to dress as I wish on the days I'm off work and I do.
    Other times are not near as inviting-to much happens in my world
    to be Abby 24/7.
    Pink is more than a color: its an attitude!

  17. #42
    One Perky Goth Gurl Pythos's Avatar
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    Wow, I am surprised by the reaction to my post.

    So many here seem very content to go with the status quo.

    It is actually quite telling. Really look at what you said. What I read is fear (justifiable to be sure), that is fed by ignorance.

    My mother, and Aviation are inflexible. But Doc, I have to ask, What negative things can YOUR kids do to you? Are these viable fears, or the irational fears we all live with?

    To the other posters talking about custody cases, Have you not seen the several court cases where the crossdressing of the husband WAS NOT even considered in the custody cases?

    The ideal world some of you talk of is one that can only come about if we all stand up for our rights. But of course you won't, and most likely neither will I. The fear is too strong, and that is all it is, fear. But we Americans that are suposedly fearless, really do exhibit some serious fear.

    Oh and no I don't have children. Never have had the money or cash flow to support one. I am quite happy I have decided to not have them, cause why in the hell would I want to bring a kid into this world? For one thing, looking like a thug is more acceptable than to look like the opposite sex. There are of course far more important things but, they really don't apply to this forum
    Last edited by Pythos; 11-08-2010 at 12:58 PM.

  18. #43
    Girl in disguise Emily Ann Brown's Avatar
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    I live alone, so yes I do. And I enjoy it! My girlfriend knows to, and is very supportive. Lucky me.


    Em
    Living with a heel in each world.

  19. #44
    Rebecca Ras's Avatar
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    I under dress daily but harder to dress more than that due the my kids...

  20. #45
    Member Polly R's Avatar
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    Hi girls

    I too have got what I believe is a very understanding wife. I used to work away a lot and 'she' always came with me in my case. Despite what my other half thought, I didn't always get dressed on nights away, I suppose it was a comfort thing if I got the urge...

    Now I'm home based, I still try not to push my luck by dressing more - it's more as the urge / need arises. She says she has no problem these days if I want to slip into femme mode when I get home from work but, even after years of CDing, I still feel a bit embarrassed dressing in her presence.

    xx Polly R

  21. #46
    Aspiring Member PrettyFlowingGown's Avatar
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    i live alone so i dress all the time, everyday/everynight, and i have good neighbours and freinds who know, so i have no issues.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]I love my gorgous flowing evening and ball gowns. I love swishing in them, and feeling how beautiful and shimmering they are. I love to feel like a princess. I love to be elegant, feminine and ladylike.

  22. #47
    Fearlessly Independent RebeccaLynne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sometimes_miss View Post
    Currently dress whenever I'm home. I come home, the boy clothes come off, shower, live as a girl until I have to go out. I buy my Cosmo, Glamour, Seventeen, etc., once a month... I tend to read a lot of the beauty/fashion forums; it's quite interesting, to read a girl's point of view, I've learned a lot over the years.
    Pretty much the same for me, although my subscriptions to Cosmo and Glamour keep me plenty busy reading about all things girly, and I'd be overwhelmed trying to add to the list...

    I have the luxury of complete freedom to dress whenever I want within my residence, as my kids are grown and on their own. My GF knows I CD, and the enjoyment I derive from it, but prefers her boyfriend be her man... which I understand. I'm her BF when I'm with her.

    Yet, I prefer being en femme alone, rather than submerging my desire to CD in order to cater to her preferences.

    She'd love a marriage proposal, but unless she comes to terms with my needs, ain't gonna happen...

  23. #48
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pythos View Post
    But Doc, I have to ask, What negative things can YOUR kids do to you? Are these viable fears, or the irational fears we all live with?

    To the other posters talking about custody cases, Have you not seen the several court cases where the crossdressing of the husband WAS NOT even considered in the custody cases?

    Oh and no I don't have children. Never have had the money or cash flow to support one. I am quite happy I have decided to not have them, cause why in the hell would I want to bring a kid into this world? For one thing, looking like a thug is more acceptable than to look like the opposite sex.
    What could my kids "do to ME"? Pythos, that thot has NEVER entered my mind!
    It's the damage to THEM that concerns me! Learning their "dad" mite be, "some weirdo stranger", that they don't know!
    For my TEEN, the consequences could be devastating!
    There's a GOOD CHANCE they will not understand! Heck, I DON"T, how could I expect them too?!

    Like u, I had no intention of having kids. Or, even marrying. Which I avoided until my middle 40's!
    However, after raising a step child, I decided I wanted one of my own! Once u have a child, expect a commitment of 18 or more years! Coming out BEFORE she's 18+, just doesn't feel rite to ME!

    All can say is, if u have your own kids, Pythos, YOU"LL UNDERSTAND!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  24. #49
    One Perky Goth Gurl Pythos's Avatar
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    Fascinating. You are concerned your kids will think you a freak, or a weirdo.

    Let me tell you something I would have MUCH rather have had my father be a crossdresser, than the bully that beat the crap out of my mom, and myself. I would much rather he to have been much less macho and more open to affection. I would much rather had him be a little softer a person than a person that drowned his sorry in alcohol. He became a nice person later in his life, but the damage was done.

    If your kids ever do find out, and that you hid it from them, I think you will be in for a world of hurt.

    Hiding helps no one.

    The whole idea that alcoholism, wife beating, and other such stuff, is more accepted than a father that crossdresses really really speaks badly of our culture.

  25. #50
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    My wife knows and tolerates, but only to a degree. One or two nights dressed a week are the max, and she freaked when I proposed to go to a cd convention in Harrisburg. Life is better than it was, but a long way to go. I was thinking of seeing how she'd react to "Sissy Sunday." Or not.

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