I've run into some of this in my own relationship, not only the assertion that I'd betrayed the masculine privilege but the claim that I'd usurped a feminine privilege of sorts as well--basically, as the argument went, I was not only being the masculine one in the relationship most of the time but edging into her, feminine territory as well, by wanting to wear lacy lingerie under my clothes and assume other usually feminine affectations (for example, painting my toenails a very girly shade of pink). She felt that she should be the one to be feminine and that I needed to stay on my side of the gender line, since she wasn't claiming that she could move across it the other way. (Which raises the question, as a longtime underdresser, am I unfairly trying to have my gender cake and eat it too, by outwardly presenting as a conventional male and secretly dressing as a female underneath? Or is this just my individual expression of gender on a long and granular continuum?)