Page 5 of 9 FirstFirst ... 34567 ... LastLast
Results 101 to 125 of 201

Thread: What being a TS is NOT

  1. #101
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    1,651
    Quote Originally Posted by Aprilrain View Post
    NOTHING is free!!!!!!!!!! someone is paying for all those "free" medical procedures.
    Yes, me and everyone else in my country. I also pay for habitual smokers with cancer, and extreme sport enthusiasts with multiple fractures. Being middle-class, I pay more taxes than most. I don't need an explanation on my country's taxation and medicare systems. I am asking you would have the surgery if you did not have to spend a dime over what you have been spending in taxes your entire life or would you still keep and even use your penis or vagina?
    It's Frances with an E, like Frances Farmer. Francis is a man's name.

  2. #102
    Senior Member Felix's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Hull, Engalnd
    Posts
    2,774
    Hy felix here I am a post op Transsexual Male I have to say it has always been important to me to pass as male not only for my own comfort but for those around me to see the real me and not some ambiguous person that they cant desipher. No disrespect to anyone else this is just a personal view.
    I agree not everyone can afford surgery and some may be because of health reasons.
    I agree totally TG is not Transsexual.
    I never dressed up Ive always except when in deep denial of who I was dressed male.
    Xx Felix :-)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    Me, Myself and Felix!!

  3. #103
    New Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    14
    In my province medical service is not free and comes out of my pocket. So I don't have the Luxury of hoping the government will remove my extra equipment in my pocket. Must be nice to have other taxpayers pay for your medical!

  4. #104
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    1,651
    Quote Originally Posted by patriciatg2 View Post
    Must be nice to have other taxpayers pay for your medical!
    Like I said, I am an other taxpayer myself. It must be nice for smokers to have me paying for their radio and chemotherapy. THAT IS NOT THE POINT! I see so much rationalizing from people on this Website about their genitals. I am asking HYPOTHETICALLY, would you have the surgery if you did not have to pay for it? For the record, the letters for my free surgery cost me $15,000.
    Last edited by Frances; 07-03-2011 at 03:05 PM.
    It's Frances with an E, like Frances Farmer. Francis is a man's name.

  5. #105
    trans punk Badtranny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    2,728
    Yeah ladies Frances is right. Let's not let this devolve further into some weird political discussion.

    Let's stay focused on my penis please. ;-)
    Quote Originally Posted by STACY B
    At least there is social acceptance in being a drunk in our world. Hell I was good at it too.
    Melissa Hobbes
    www.badtranny.com

  6. #106
    Not sure where I am yet Jay Cee's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Somewhere in Canada
    Posts
    1,094
    Quote Originally Posted by Badtranny View Post
    Yeah ladies Frances is right. Let's not let this devolve further into some weird political discussion.
    +1 on that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Badtranny
    Let's stay focused on my penis please. ;-)



    And please remember this:

    Quote Originally Posted by Katesback
    ..I am NOT here to make friends...
    Is anyone else seeing more than a bit of judgement and harshness here? Please, ladies (and gentlemen)... step back, take a deep breath, and try to lower your blood pressure a bit.
    Last edited by Jay Cee; 07-03-2011 at 03:44 PM.

  7. #107
    Be free - overcome fear!
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    2,909
    First of all statement is aimed at the comments of Katesback

    My pyschologist told me once 'There are many women with penises & men with vaginas'.

    This weekend I spent with a group of lesbian friends who see me & accept me fully as a woman & yet I am still pre-op &
    I also found out this weekend this group of girls will viscously defend me against anyone who ever tried to say otherwise.

    One of my lesbian girlfriends who I was out with is one of these men with vaginas who is more masculine (male) than
    lot of so called 'men' I know. In fact whenever she goes to use the female toilets she is often confused as being a guy
    by other girls who are using the toilets & yet if she walked into the men's toilet noone would bat any eyelid.

    So I will say it again for Kate's sake.. 'YOUR GENDER IDENTITY IS NOT DEFINED BY WHAT IS BETWEEN YOUR LEGS!'
    Last edited by Melody Moore; 07-03-2011 at 05:11 PM.

  8. #108
    Miss Aligned danielle40I's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Central North Carolina
    Posts
    219
    Amen Melody! You're spot on.

  9. #109
    What is normal anyway? Rianna Humble's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    At home in my own skin
    Posts
    8,586
    Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
    This does not mean that I look down upon other people that are not like me, but when they suggest that they actually are like me I say hell no.
    I don't think many people are insane enough to want to be as bigoted as you, Kate.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bree_K View Post
    Kate, why don't you write a book on the perfect way to transition since you have it all figured out for everyone else?
    Publsihers generally want there to be some content before they will publish a book
    Last edited by Rianna Humble; 07-03-2011 at 06:30 PM.
    Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.

    This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any

    Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist

    Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity

  10. #110
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    6,640
    Quote Originally Posted by Bree_K View Post

    So you're saying that because I can enjoy being with my boyfriend with or without my penis, even though I still can't get off when I use it, that I still sometimes get depressed after using it, that I am not a transexual? You're saying that because my boyfriend can feel a connection with me when he uses his vagina, that he is not a transexual? I might be making an assumption that you are saying that this is an "important difference" between us because I'm not transexual like you... but I may just be getting defensive, so I apologize if this is not what you're saying.
    Apology accepted LOL....sorry if i was unclear
    ..the thought you mentioned above never occured to me.. i was curious what you meant by connected..
    i never felt a connection THROUGH sex...sex always felt uncomfortable to me no matter what i tried... pls look at the last two sentences of that post..

    Okay melody, transsexuals and women are not defined by what's between their legs, I get it....
    of course, i don't think I or anyone ever said anything different..we are not talking about the parts you started with ...we are talking about the parts you wish you had

    I think it's perfectly reasonable and smart to take your time if you have it... Getting surgeries is invasive and risky, jobs and families get lost... Kate its not crazy at all to work stuff out with people... the better your job, the more valuable you are , the more likely people will work with you....a girl that advised me over the years always said to me "bring your brain along with you" because she felt many ts people lose their heads going all out for transition and surgery with no thought of the consequences..
    i like the way she said it...the good thing about trying to work it out is you get to see if you like the way its going...you may find you don't like being the company ts, or that you are getting marginalized (the most likely scenario), but at least you will know you tried, you'll have no burned bridges, and you'll have a better idea of what's best for you..

    blowing up your life is not a badge of honor, its just a nasty thing that transsexuals often need to deal with to get what they need...

  11. #111
    Style Icon Sara Jessica's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    The OC, California
    Posts
    5,919
    Upon tripping into this thread when it was merely a single page, I knew exactly what was coming...

    Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
    I have to say one thing. If someone has no desire to have SRS then they ARE NOT TS. If they dont have the means to have SRS then I can take that but if someone wants to be a girl with a penis they sure as hell are not TS!
    It has degenerated into a label-fest but in circling back around, the original question was...

    What being a TS is not.

    Didn't Melissa state this in her original premise? Being TS is not having surgeries. Yep, being TS is not being defined by what is between your legs. Seems the DSM IV kind of supports this premise, that to be diagnosed TS has nothing to do with SRS.

    TS is something we are. Transition is something many of us do. Seems pretty simple to me.
    Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
    Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)

  12. #112
    Psyco Roller Derby Doll. Katesback's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    1,204
    But the original post said "what being TS is not".

    I will state again that a person that wants to live thier life presenting a woman BUT has not desire to have SRS is NOT a TS. That person totally can call themselves transgender but they arent TS. Some people dont like labels but then hey if we didnt have some labels they we would be no different than a CD or drag queen. I personally know I am not a CD or drag queen. Are you?

    Am I bigited? Well considering some of you have these mystical powers to discern my intent, or have the ability to read into a statment beayond what is said I will not defend your assertious because your nuts and theres not way to argue with a nut case. Considering that the trans world is filled with nut cases it does not surprise me that many are not willing to face a point of view based on a realistic perspective. Instead many want to play in thier own fantasy world and hear words of encouragement from so called friends. They want thier friends to tell them they are doing great regardless of reality.

    A wise transgirl once upon a time told me something I will never forget. She and I were talking about the disfunction within the trans community. She looked at me and said "the problem with many trans people is they need thier asses beat". She had no further desire to talk about trans people. This conversation happend when I was pre-op and I could not understand what she meant. Well you have herd me tell you that transition starts after SRS. I now understand the meaning of her words.

    So now we go back to the concept of disfunction within the community. If you are or you support the idea that a person that presents to the world a female but has a penis and has no desire to have SRS is a TRANSSEXUAL your feeding the disfunction. Spare me the gender identity is in your head. Sure thats correct but the formentioned scenerio is nothing more than a glorified crossdresser. They are NOT I repeat NOT a woman. Women dont have penises!

    Ya don't like what I say. Well perhaps thats why so very very few post-op girls venture into the community. See they are women. They support women. They do not support disfunction and dont want anything to do with it. They took the steps to be a woman (within the abilities of modern medicine). You can rail me for taking the time to talk to some of you. I have stated my reasons for being here. You dont have to like it and I personally dont care what fakes, nuts, men that want to live like women, or any other sillyness thinks. I care about the few REAL transsexual women that might come here and have REAL questions and want to have a realstic answer from one of the small few that have ACTUALLY gone through the process.



    Quote Originally Posted by Sara Jessica View Post
    Upon tripping into this thread when it was merely a single page, I knew exactly what was coming...



    It has degenerated into a label-fest but in circling back around, the original question was...

    What being a TS is not.

    Didn't Melissa state this in her original premise? Being TS is not having surgeries. Yep, being TS is not being defined by what is between your legs. Seems the DSM IV kind of supports this premise, that to be diagnosed TS has nothing to do with SRS.

    TS is something we are. Transition is something many of us do. Seems pretty simple to me.
    Last edited by Katesback; 07-04-2011 at 11:12 AM.

  13. #113
    Senior Member pamela_a's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Twin Cities Suburbs
    Posts
    1,592
    Label me also a heretic but Kate is spot on. Women don't want to have a penis, it's not natural. As she's said repeatedly it's not about what you are able to do. It's about what you desire. Just as too many transmen are forced, because of cost and the difficulty of the surgery, are forced to have to live their lives with a vagina that doesn't mean they want to.

    The vast majority of this forum appears to be Rah Rah, you go girl cheerleader answers. No matter what is said or done it's all good because everyone's different. Welcome to the cis world. What ever you chose to believe, the "real" world operates by the rule there are 2 genders, male and female. Male's have and love their penises and women have a vagina. Period, end of discussion. A "female" with a penis is a sex object made popular in the porn industry and loved mostly by men I'm not at all interested in being around. It doesn't matter what you want to believe or what you want to happen that's the way the world works. It's not hate or condensation, it's the reality of life in the real world

    Standing to pee??? How disgusting!!
    That something only a MALE does. Although I've heard women comment about wanting to be able to do it the reality is a female can't. Transition involves having the strength, willingness and intestinal fortitude to walk away from the "male privilege" you've grown up with and embrace completely being female.

    Hate me just like you hate Kate, that's fine. Take off your rose colored glasses and see how the real world works, not how you want to imagine it to be.

    What a TS is not? A TS is a person who wants the external genitalia they are supposed to have and is willing to exhaust all possible ways of accomplishing that. Success is secondary, it's the desire that makes the difference.
    "Willfully turning aside from the truth is treason to one's self." - Wizard's Tenth Rule:
    "Life is the future, not the past." - Wizard's Seventh Rule
    "Deserve victory." - Wizard's Eighth Rule
    "Be justified in your convictions. Be completely committed. Earn what you want and need rather than waiting for others to give you what you desire."

    There is just one life for each of us: our own - Words from a fortune cookie

    Do or Do Not. There is no try - Yoda

  14. #114
    Aspiring Member JulieK1980's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Canonsburg, PA
    Posts
    686
    Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
    My perspectives are based upon having lived through the process beayond SRS and FFS. That would make me an expert in some ways. Since very few of you have had SRS I would suggest you accept you might not know quite as much as someone that has had it.
    So if someone has their gallbladder removed does that make them a surgeon?

    Being TS is what's in your own mind, and heart. It's something no other human being on the planet can answer for you. By the very definition, it's likely the outside doesn't come close to matching what is inside of you.


    I think Melody said it best when she said, "There are many women with penises and many men with vaginas." (paraphrased)

  15. #115
    Psyco Roller Derby Doll. Katesback's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    1,204
    If you want to belive this then more power to you. I would however suggest you do a poll of people you meet on the street to see if they agree with you perspective. I doubt many people agree with the gender screw concept. I know I dont.




    Quote Originally Posted by JodyCD View Post
    So if someone has their gallbladder removed does that make them a surgeon?

    Being TS is what's in your own mind, and heart. It's something no other human being on the planet can answer for you. By the very definition, it's likely the outside doesn't come close to matching what is inside of you.


    I think Melody said it best when she said, "There are many women with penises and many men with vaginas." (paraphrased)

  16. #116
    Aspiring Member JulieK1980's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Canonsburg, PA
    Posts
    686
    Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
    If you want to belive this then more power to you. I would however suggest you do a poll of people you meet on the street to see if they agree with you perspective. I doubt many people agree with the gender screw concept. I know I dont.
    Yes Kate, you've made your position quite clear that you define it by either not having a penis, or desiring to remove it, and more power to you, if you believe that. I personally think that's rather oversimplified. Yes, I could "poll people on the street" to determine their views if I had the least interest in personal opinions of people that know nothing on the topic. However, I'd rather stick to mental/behavioral health and the DSM IV. Opinions are just opinions. Opinions based on research and empirical evidence however, are at least based on reason and evidence. (Still they are just opinions of course, but this is an exercise in subjectivity from the outset.)

  17. #117
    What is normal anyway? Rianna Humble's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    At home in my own skin
    Posts
    8,586
    Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
    Am I bigited? Well considering some of you have these mystical powers to discern my intent, or have the ability to read into a statment beayond what is said I will not defend your assertious because your nuts and theres not way to argue with a nut case. Considering that the trans world is filled with nut cases it does not surprise me that many are not willing to face a point of view based on a realistic perspective. Instead many want to play in thier own fantasy world and hear words of encouragement from so called friends. They want thier friends to tell them they are doing great regardless of reality.
    Classic mark of a bigot, accusing others of the same hypocrisy that they themselves display.

    You claim that we cannot discern your intent through your hate-filled bile, yet you pretend to discern our intent. I can only repeat, someone would need to be certifiably insane to want to be like you
    Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.

    This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any

    Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist

    Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity

  18. #118
    trans punk Badtranny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    2,728
    Quote Originally Posted by pamela_a View Post
    What ever you chose to believe, the "real" world operates by the rule there are 2 genders, male and female. A "female" with a penis is a sex object made popular in the porn industry and loved mostly by men I'm not at all interested in being around. It doesn't matter what you want to believe or what you want to happen that's the way the world works. It's not hate or condensation, it's the reality of life in the real world
    Jeeeeezus will you binaries please stop telling us how the real world works! Believe me I've been acquainted with the real world. Why are you people in particular so intent on invoking the real world as if I don't wake up every day and deal with my burgeoning transition and whatever consequences that day brings. I have a mortgage and a boyfriend and a bunch of really incredible friends who who are probably better than I deserve. What part of my life exactly do you and the others think is fantasy?

    Quote Originally Posted by pamela_a View Post
    [/I]Standing to pee??? How disgusting!![/I] That something only a MALE does. Transition involves having the strength, willingness and intestinal fortitude to walk away from the "male privilege" you've grown up with and embrace completely being female.
    Hate me just like you hate Kate, that's fine. Take off your rose colored glasses and see how the real world works, not how you want to imagine it to be.
    Standing to pee is disgusting? I don't know, I've been in many restrooms where I was thankful that I didn't have to sit. You are of course entitled to your opinion, but personally I think it's a little weird to pretend you don't have a penis when you've had it all your life. You see, I live in the real world where I was born with this body and it's all I know. Even if I did want to eventually get the SRS, I still wouldn't pretend I didn't have a dangly. It's there. I don't live in a fantasy world.

    Regarding male privilege, how am I not walking away from it? This time next year I'll be living full time and I can assure you that nobody is likely to mistake me for a man. I should say that my trans status will not be a secret though. Living stealth is not as interesting to me as living out loud. ...and it just occurred to me that you and the SRS brigade are not gonna be happy with that concept at all.

    Well Pamela, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I rarely encounter someone in the"real world" that I hate and I can't even imagine feeling that strongly about random people on the internet.

    Please explain what you think I'm seeing through my rose colored glasses? My therapist has told me that my realistic outlook on my transition is refreshing because she worries that some of the girls can get a little ahead of themselves. She also said that FFS is far more important to your lifestyle than SRS. Not my words, so don't bark at me.

    How do you think I imagine the world to be? I'm taking this transition very seriously because I know how rough the world is and I'm trying to give myself every advantage I can in an effort to overcome the difficulties that transition brings. Anybody who knows my story would completely disagree with your assessment of my rose colored outlook. I know this is serious and I'm acting accordingly. Please tell me how I'm not. If you can.
    Quote Originally Posted by STACY B
    At least there is social acceptance in being a drunk in our world. Hell I was good at it too.
    Melissa Hobbes
    www.badtranny.com

  19. #119
    Silver Member Starling's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    on the way
    Posts
    2,545
    With no disrespect to the brothers, I believe this thread has almost literally become a pissing contest. Apparently, it takes real balls to get them cut off.

    Lallie

    PS: But please, I don't want it to stop. I'm learning so much about everybody.
    Time for a change.

  20. #120
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    2,422
    Quote Originally Posted by pamela_a View Post
    As she's said repeatedly it's not about what you are able to do. It's about what you desire. Just as too many transmen are forced, because of cost and the difficulty of the surgery, are forced to have to live their lives with a vagina that doesn't mean they want to.
    That may be what she means, and that I agree with. But the way she shares her opinion comes across as very hateful and rude, and I rarely see her clarify that that is what she actually means. She is also full of other very ignorant and bigoted views that don't really help clarify that the one sane view she has is the one she is expressing.

    Quote Originally Posted by pamela_a View Post
    The vast majority of this forum appears to be Rah Rah, you go girl cheerleader answers. No matter what is said or done it's all good because everyone's different. Welcome to the cis world. What ever you chose to believe, the "real" world operates by the rule there are 2 genders, male and female. Male's have and love their penises and women have a vagina. Period, end of discussion. A "female" with a penis is a sex object made popular in the porn industry and loved mostly by men I'm not at all interested in being around. It doesn't matter what you want to believe or what you want to happen that's the way the world works. It's not hate or condensation, it's the reality of life in the real world
    Yes most people in the real world only except the gender binary. But not everyone fits into that binary. Transitioning is not something just classic transexuals do, and not everyone is going from one extreme side to the other. If I felt like I was somewhere in between, I wouldn't transition to be either strictly male or strictly female because that's what the rest of the world dictates. Gender is a spectrum and no, it is not strictly men have penises and women have vaginas. What you believe is not reality Pamela. What you just spewed here is what YOU believe. It may be what most people believe too, but that doesn't mean it's right.

    Quote Originally Posted by pamela_a View Post
    Standing to pee??? How disgusting!! That something only a MALE does. Although I've heard women comment about wanting to be able to do it the reality is a female can't. Transition involves having the strength, willingness and intestinal fortitude to walk away from the "male privilege" you've grown up with and embrace completely being female.
    I never stood to pee... never understood it. And no, transitioning isn't to fit into another role you don't belong in. Transitioning is getting over the ignorance and the roles everyone assigned you and to just be yourself. For transexuals, that is usually going to be the opposite gender than that of your birth gender. For many transgendered individuals, being themselves may not mean fitting into a specific role... but to say "screw it" to the two roles we're given and just BE.

    Quote Originally Posted by pamela_a View Post
    Hate me just like you hate Kate, that's fine. Take off your rose colored glasses and see how the real world works, not how you want to imagine it to be.

    What a TS is not? A TS is a person who wants the external genitalia they are supposed to have and is willing to exhaust all possible ways of accomplishing that. Success is secondary, it's the desire that makes the difference.
    Desire and motivation are two different things. What you do about being TS doesn't determine if you are TS. Just like if a gay man were in the closet his whole life and could never admit to himself that he was gay... that doesn't make him not gay. According to you're logic, I'm more deserving of being TS than you are because I accepted and began transitioning earlier in my life than you. That's not really what I believe, but that's the same kind of bullshit you're spouting off.

    Honestly... you all talking about the "real world" are just expressing your opinion. We all live in the real world... some of you are just don't understand that not everything operates the way you feel it should.
    Last edited by Bree-asaurus; 07-04-2011 at 02:28 PM.

  21. #121
    Silver Member Starling's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    on the way
    Posts
    2,545
    A point about "male privilege," if you will allow me. MP is something one immediately gives up when she is identified as a gender variant. I could be wrong, but I'd guess that a fully passable post-op transwoman would be treated far better in the mainstream than someone who is out but has not been able to, or chooses not to, have HRT, FFS and SRS.

    Lallie
    Time for a change.

  22. #122
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    1,651
    Quote Originally Posted by LALady View Post
    A point about "male privilege," if you will allow me. MP is something one immediately gives up when she is identified as a gender variant. I could be wrong, but I'd guess that a fully passable post-op transwoman would be treated far better in the mainstream than someone who is out but has not been able to, or chooses not to, have HRT, FFS and SRS.
    Totally agree.

    Bornstein view of gender as pyramid expressing levels of power, masculine males are on top and feminine females come in second. Gender variants are very low on the power/privilege scale.

    Being stealth and passing very well are tremendous privileges in my life that I will not comprise to advance the cause. I am being entirely selfish here, of course. I have lost any male privilege that I may have had at one point in my life (privileges known to me, but most often not), but I have acquired a whole new set of cis-privileges on the female side of society. And SRS only renforced this. I believe there are many ways to be a person, but I wonder why other trans people would not want to acquire cis-privileges through SRS and other actions in support of passing or disappearing. I am asking the question for realz. I am not passing jugement or saying people are wrong for not wanting it.

    On thing I have noticed is that a lot of trans folks in early stages of transition (while they are visibly trans), want to be out to the world and neutralise potential hurtful situations on the basis of their trans status, while a few more months of transition would suffice to pass completely.
    It's Frances with an E, like Frances Farmer. Francis is a man's name.

  23. #123
    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    New Hampshire ( recent transplant)
    Posts
    3,498
    Quote Originally Posted by Frances View Post
    Totally agree.

    Bornstein view of gender as pyramid expressing levels of power, masculine males are on top and feminine females come in second. Gender variants are very low on the power/privilege scale.

    Being stealth and passing very well are tremendous privileges in my life that I will not comprise to advance the cause. I am being entirely selfish here, of course. I have lost any male privilege that I may have had at one point in my life (privileges known to me, but most often not), but I have acquired a whole new set of cis-privileges on the female side of society. And SRS only renforced this. I believe there are many ways to be a person, but I wonder why other trans people would not want to acquire cis-privileges through SRS and other actions in support of passing or disappearing. I am asking the question for realz. I am not passing jugement or saying people are wrong for not wanting it.

    On thing I have noticed is that a lot of trans folks in early stages of transition (while they are visibly trans), want to be out to the world and neutralise potential hurtful situations on the basis of their trans status, while a few more months of transition would suffice to pass completely.
    Well said! As I said before.. these things may or may not define a woman, but they sure can be a tremendous help while running around out there in society.
    "one day I'll fly away..... leave all this to yesterday"

    http://youtu.be/kR7NlgwVHHg

  24. #124
    trans punk Badtranny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    2,728
    Quote Originally Posted by kellycan27 View Post
    Well said! As I said before.. these things may or may not define a woman, but they sure can be a tremendous help while running around out there in society.
    I don't have any quarrel with that. But since that point has been made and this thread has morphed into a bit of a pickle bashing, I just want to point out that after I "pass completely" which will be very soon. Who will know what I have in my Seven's unless I tell them? Regarding the vag, let me put the rabid vag wavers (not you Kell and Frances) at ease, by saying that wanting the 'gina isn't the point for me. I've always wanted one, but came to the realization early on that I wasn't gonna get one. Of course later I found out it's indeed possible but it seems like an awful lot of work and risk for something that I can live without.
    Does that make me a glorified cross dresser? Honestly I don't really care. I'm not aware of any TS badges that are being awarded and in "real life" the labels mean even less than they do here.
    So there is a pack of trannies that don't understand me? Big whoop, I've been on the outside all my life.
    Real girls don't want a penis? So what I was born a guy and got my ass kicked all the time because I wasn't "guy" enough. I think I've earned the right to use my twig. I don't have anything against those that like to pretend they don't have one, to each their own. It's none of my business what you're doing down there unless we're gonna get busy and trust me, if you're ambivalent about your pickle, I'm not interested. ;-)
    Will I go all the way someday? Kelly and I have chatted about it and she makes a compelling case. (she's my girl and I got her back even when we're on different sides) Who knows it all depends on what's going on. If I'm in a relationship with a man who wants me to keep it, maybe I will. If he wants me to get rid of it, maybe I will. Clearly it's not the defining issue for me.

    These days I present as a gender queer who dates men exclusively and soon I will present as a trans woman who dates men exclusively. I'm looking forward to the transition as well as the pending facial and breast procedures. You girls can call me whatever you want, but I can guarantee you that in the "real world" no one will call me a man.
    Quote Originally Posted by STACY B
    At least there is social acceptance in being a drunk in our world. Hell I was good at it too.
    Melissa Hobbes
    www.badtranny.com

  25. #125
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    2,422
    Quote Originally Posted by kellycan27 View Post
    Well said! As I said before.. these things may or may not define a woman, but they sure can be a tremendous help while running around out there in society.
    Yuppers!

    I envy your boobage Kelly... You are gorgeous (all around, not just talking about your chest :P)!

    Quote Originally Posted by Badtranny View Post
    Who knows it all depends on what's going on. If I'm in a relationship with a man who wants me to keep it, maybe I will. If he wants me to get rid of it, maybe I will. Clearly it's not the defining issue for me.
    I felt like that for a little while with my current BF... but I couldn't keep that state of mind... I went back to wanting SRS no matter what happens. (not arguing like a lot of this thread is... I'm just chatting here )
    Last edited by Bree-asaurus; 07-04-2011 at 04:36 PM.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State