What is HER defining moment?

[suchacutie]

There have been a number of threads talking about the point at which we feel we've transitioned from masculine to feminine (for those of us who change back and forth!). Some point to stockings, or heels, or makeup, or lingerie.

Last night, my wife came home from shopping in my mid transition. The two of us like to keep Tina as a separate person so transistion is normally a time we don't share, but we do always greet each other with a kiss when I'm in drab. So she asked where I was and then said:

"You don't have your lipstick on so you're not Tina yet!"

Ok, my wife defines transition as lipstick! For those of you who are out to your SO and move back and forth from one gender to another, does anyone else know the defining moment when your SO determines that you are your feminine self, or at what point in your transition would she start to call you by your feminine name?? I didn't until last night and it just made me smile!

tina

[Paula_56]

Crowning Glory, my wig!

[5150 Girl]

Crowning Glory, my wig!

Agreed.
Copupled with a nice close shave

[suchacutie]

I also thought it would be the hair and makeup, so the lipstick definition really surprised me. The other surprise for me a while back was that facial hair wasn't a problem, even without foundation. It just goes to show that perceptions can't be taken for granted!

tina

[AmberLynn]

when im dressed in a fem outfit with makeup and hair done my wife considers me amber,other then that im sweetie

[AlisonRenee]

When the makeup is done and the hair goes on. Even if I'm otherwise completely dressed, it isn't "done" until the face and hair say girl.

[jenna_woods]

all I can say is for my self once I get my make up on I AM female, from that point on, there's no question in my mine I change completely at that point.

[Karren H]

For me... There is no one moment... Its just me.... In various stages of prettiness... Maybe when I hit the 50% pretty level? Lol. He and she is me..

[Kate Simmons]

I have to agree with Karren. It's always just "me" albeit in a different choice of costume.

[suchacutie]

Do I detect that we are morphing back to when WE feel we are feminine?

My thrust started out about when we are perceived by some other to be feminine, since I found out yesterday that my perception and my wife's were very different!

Hmmm, maybe there is another category. Karren...is what you are saying is that you don't allow for anyone else to attempt the perception until you are ready?

tina

[CherylFlint]

The wig is the very last item that goes on, and when that happens "Hello Cheryl!".

[Karren H]

Actually....... I don't catagorize well.. And don't care what others think! Lol. So whether they see me as a fem guy in a dress or a masculine girl or a guy or a girl (which I fear rarely happens in reality), I don't really pay attention to.. And no one gets to see me before I'm ready to let them..

[Christina Horton]

It's the wig for me . All through out my prep i get my girl on and when my wig goes on there she is. It's all way a nice little shock when that wig go on and I see Christina I all most want to cry, cuz I missed her very much. My girl friends Roberta M (from this site) She takes more time thin I do. If I could wave a want and be Christina instantly I would be right there and feel like Myself just that fast . Roberta takes about 1/2 to or more after she is made up to get into girl mode. But she is finding herself faster the more she goes out dressed. I fell partly fem in drab, less now since I had to get ride of my long painted nails. New Job.

As for a girl friend or wife I have none yet , but am working on that. It would be neat to see where she think my transformation is at , what point is it and why she thinks so.

You should ask your wife why she thinks that is the point she sees Tina? I would like to know why. Have fun hun.

[suchacutie]

Karren: I totally agree that we are who we are when we want to be! (hmmm, did that make sense?) Only letting others see us as we want helps that along. Having a supportive wife does change the game a bit . I don't mind her popping in, though it's sure odd to be someplace in between masculine and feminine (not even sure what voice to use instinctively!). I just had never thought about what the trigger is for others to perceive us as feminine.

Christina: I will ask her. I should have this morning but I just didn't have enough coffee to think straight and last night it was late before the transformation back to masculine.

tina

[SuzanneBender]

I have been told its the wig. Clothes and makeup are just clothes and makeup until the wig goes on. I have even heard "get your wig on you are giving me the ooogies..." Not sure what those darn oogies are, but it tells me why she never liked Shenae O'Conner.

[jenniferishappy]

My SO hasnt seen me yet, but adhesive breast forms are what puts me in my girl space completely. Without them I am only 1/2 there. The adhesive that keeps them attached when leaning forward and such really lets me suspend the remaining disbelief while dressed.
I put my wig on after I have shaved before I put makeup on. I like to feel like a girl while putting makeup on and the wig helps with that, until I get my hair long enough. I will then most likely dispense with the wig for the most part. Getting bangs cut is going to be intersting as a guy with otherwise long hair though.

[suchacutie]

Christina, the discussion was fascinating. It turns out that Tina is considered a mental as well as physical being. Thus, if Tina says she has arrived, she has, thus, entered the building! Since she hadn't arrived, and since there was only makeup and a bit of feminine trappings (no wig), the lack of lipstick made it not yet feminine!

So, if Tina has the trappings and is obviously feminine, then she has arrived, if she says she has arrived, she has arrived, and if she has lipstick, kisses are OUT!!!

Interesting! and complicated!

tina

[Nikki A.]

As for me it's puting on a bra, in that panties are my everyday underwear. But to feel complete I need the whole package.
When my wife was alive, it wasn't the clothing, but wearing a bra and having breasts was what bothered her more. The breasts were the dividing point between male and female. Me wearing a skirt or a blouse around the house didn't bother her (clothes are clothes) as long as I had no boobs, and I wasn't really into make up then since I didn't go out dressed then.

[docrobbysherry]

Wig!

[sherri52]

The heels make me feel like I've transitioned but I do have to have lipstick and may walk around the house barefoot.

[susan lewis]

It is a two step moment, the lipstick and then the heels. Then I am finally all feminine and the real me is free

[jenna_woods]

thats easy wen the make goes on I am female again , for there is no stoping from then on.

[rachael.davis]

at the very end when I take the posts out of my ears, and put in pendant earrings , and the rest of my jewelry

[NathalieX66]

When "she" leaves the house and jumps in the car, and goes somewhere.