I don't care if I pass just that people treat me like a lady....How bout you?

[Cheryl T]

[SIZE=3]Like so many others I would love to pass 100% and be able to go about my business as any woman would do.
I realize that is not the case and will never be. At first I was focused on that goal until I realized that when I go out most people don't even see me. They are all so wrapped up in their portion of the world that for the most part I am just a "blip on the radar". They see me in that split second as they pass by and shortly after they wouldn't even remember that I was there.
It's no longer about "passing". It's about being a confident woman and being able to express myself in the world and go about my business interacting graciously with others. I just want to be me and be accepted for that. The rest doesn't matter anymore.[/SIZE]

[skirtsuit]

I'm a guy in dress and am comfortable with that. I try to do good enough so that most people won't give me a second look, altho women look me straight in the eyes ALOT. I personally like to put myself in situations where people might notice me like sitting at a table next to a group of women at a coffee shop or walking directly thru a large group of school girls on the street.

My goal as an occasional CD is not to 'pass' so that people who look closely or talk to me can't tell but something much closer to a magic or Jedi knight trick - "there's nothing to see here". If someone's brain doesn't register that something's amiss they might not even really look at you once.

All the Best,

Ann / SS

[Christina Horton]

I'm a guy in dress and am comfortable with that. I try to do good enough so that most people won't give me a second look, altho women look me straight in the eyes ALOT. I personally like to put myself in situations where people might notice me like sitting at a table next to a group of women at a coffee shop or walking directly thru a large group of school girls on the street.

Ya I do the same thing. One of the first times Roberta and I went out to supper and Red Robins I made sure that I was the first thing people saw at out table. I did it for two reasons , Roberta was a little nervous about being dressed as a restaurant and second I love to see people SEE me and see what they do after the SEE me SEE them SEE me lol.

And just before We got to the restaurant I steered us right by a group of people guys and girls to see what they would do or say. I have been call Fearless , but some might call me stupid LOL. It's fun to watch people see you and then look away so they don't INSAULT you. Most people are very good about it and a few are not and I have not had any real probs , just 2 sightly mean comments.

[Heelsnlegs]

you inspire me hon! Im so worried about being read it ruins my outings. Even when Im out on Davie and I'm clocked it makes me nervous. I need to take your attitude to the street!

[Christina Horton]

you inspire me hon! Im so worried about being read it ruins my outings. Even when Im out on Davie and I'm clocked it makes me nervous. I need to take your attitude to the street!

Ok you may use to and I won't even charge you to use it. LOL. Just use it to the max and then go beyond it. Push your comfort zone and you'll love it. I always look for ways to put my comfort zone. And I do LOL, and I love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[carhill2mn]

The term "pass" is often used but I am not sure that there is an absolute definition as to what it means. I have been told by others that I "pass" when out in public which is great but my main desire is to be treated as a "lady" regardles of whether or not I an "passing".
I have been "out and about" hundreds of times and, so far, have never been treated as other than a lady. Do I always "pass"? I don't know and I don't really care as long as I am accepted as the person whom I am presenting.

[Rianna Humble]

I would say that with my voice being so deep I almost definitely don't "pass", but it was still good to be called a "lady" by a GG SA who needed to call someone over to help me in the shop yesterday.

[Tasha McIntyre]

I don't pass - or at least I don't think I do, but i have never had a bad experience whilst out and about. So, to answer the question, being treated well (like SA's falling over themselves with clothes, and ushering me into a fitting room) is more important than passing.

Tash

[Christina Horton]

The term "pass" is often used...............I have been "out and about" hundreds of times and, so far, have never been treated as other than a lady. Do I always "pass"? I don't know and I don't really care as long as I am accepted as the person whom I am presenting.

'Passing" I think it means that you look like and are excepted by all you met as a women. So if people know your a CD then no you don't pass. That being said being treated as a lady EVEN IF you don't "pass" is just as good. Plus you still get to see the peoples faces that are startled when they see you That's still fun for me LOL.

I would say that with my voice being so deep I almost definitely don't "pass", but it was still good to be called a "lady" by a GG SA who needed to call someone over to help me in the shop yesterday.

I have a very deep voice and I am able to have a fem-voice. I have been told but lots of people that they think my voice is perfect. My mom hates it. I guess she just so used to my male voice and thinks it sounds fake and forced. But until last year she had not come to terms with my CDing. So when I'm dressed with her she wants me to use my male voice LOL. Well at least she is ok enough with it she allows me to dress once in a while around her.

I don't pass........So, to answer the question, being treated well (like SA's falling over themselves with clothes, and ushering me into a fitting room) is more important than passing.

Tash

Looking at your pic I'd say you look great....better then me.....(bitch) LOL.
I love SA's like that there trying for a sale but they treat you like all the other women that come in there. Plus when you don't pass they remember you and will call you by name. I love that. My girl friend Roberta and I went to a store I love to go to and once she went in there by herself and they called her Christina LOL. Now thats funny. Now if I could get a job as a professional shopper I'd be happy.

[Naomi Rayne]

My life isnt surrounded by needing to pass. I have not gone out yet, but if and when i do my priority is to make myself happy. If i pass, thats great. If i dont then i will just live with that and adjust accordingly. People do need to be educated about CDing because it is a very harmless thing and a great thing Although i am most definitely biased on that.

[Christina Horton]

My life isn't surrounded by needing to pass. I have not gone out yet, but if and when i do my priority is to make myself happy.

That's great but when you finally do go out you might find that passing is something you really really want. Some people need to pass cuz of the people around them . I am not one of them but I live in a place where it's a live and let live for the most part. Plus were all Canadians here so how bad c=could it be EH!!!

If i pass, thats great. If i don't then i will just live with that and adjust accordingly.

Just the way I first started to think but not till I was going out for a year. That's when I changed the way I would look at passing.

People do need to be educated about CDing because it is a very harmless thing and a great thing Although i am most definitely biased on that.

Yes the do and A HUGE yes you are lol. If you weren't a CDer would you be so excepting???

[Naomi Rayne]

I would like to think that i would be as accepting and understandable. I have had CD thoughts for quite a long time dating back to when i was a kid. But never did anything about it until i recently started. So i am not sure if that would count towards why i am accepting, but i have always been a do what you love person and not what the rest of society tells you to do. I dont like how formulated society is and how no matter what the situation if someone is different they are shot down and picked on. Its not right and i am always trying to open peoples eyes even if its just about something little.

[Christina Horton]

I would like to think that i would be as accepting and understandable. I have had CD thoughts for quite a long time dating back to when i was a kid. But never did anything about it until i recently started. So i am not sure if that would count towards why i am accepting, but i have always been a do what you love person and not what the rest of society tells you to do. I dont like how formulated society is and how no matter what the situation if someone is different they are shot down and picked on. Its not right and i am always trying to open peoples eyes even if its just about something little.

Ya I hope if I was NOT a CD would I be so understanding of others. I would like to think so but who knows. If I was not a CDer and very FEM-inside I could be a Neanderthal or something. No telling how me male side would be like. But my mom and dad did a good job raising me so I think based on that I would be ok with it though I would not understand why , but be ok with it.

Wow when you think how different your life would be with out this part of our life it would be so different.

[Naomi Rayne]

Ya I hope if I was NOT a CD would I be so understanding of others. I would like to think so but who knows. If I was not a CDer and very FEM-inside I could be a Neanderthal or something. No telling how me male side would be like. But my mom and dad did a good job raising me so I think based on that I would be ok with it though I would not understand why , but be ok with it.

Wow when you think how different your life would be with out this part of our life it would be so different.

It would be extremely different, but I prefer not to think about how my life would be like without this part of me because i wouldn't want my life like that. I am very proud of who i am and what i do. My mom and dad raised me to be respectful of others and i have taken that and applied it to every situation i can.

[Victoria Anne]

I used to be the T-girl freaking out but anymore If I pass fantastic if not oh well I out here for myself not them and I am going to enjoy being who I am .

[Fab Karen]

"Since I don't pass , I have the philosophy that if you don't pass and people see you , and IF there experience with you is a good one , then they come away with the experience as better person and expand there acceptance of us and others like us more."
Quite right.
To paraphrase Helen Reddy:
I am TG hear me roar
in numbers too big to ignore ( more & more all the time )
and I know too much to go back now

[janelle]

To be treated as I treat people -------------WITH RESPECT!!!!!!!!

[Angiemead12]

Yup just be treated as another human being!

[Christina Horton]

Yup just be treated as another human being!

I find that statement a little funny. If you Just want to be treated like a human being and not a women then...Why dress as a women???

Just the first thing that popped into my head when I read that. Yes it's nice to be treated like a human being but then again thats how I am sooooooo, I want to be treated like a lady not JUST a human. I get treated like a human all the time. I want a change LOL.

[randumbness]

Being a closet crossdresser for the longest time (since I was a little boy), I've only recently started to try to get my appearance as passing. It all has to do with confidence. I still have yet to gain enough and have enough people to support me so that I can say eff the rest of the world, but in any case, I have a need to pass.

For those that can say I don't care, just treat me like a lady, I admire your courage.

[Imogen_Mann]

There's no need to treat me as a lady, man, alien or divine being (which I undoubtedly am). Just treat me with respect.

[Christina Horton]

Being a closet crossdresser for the longest time (since I was a little boy), I've only recently started to try to get my appearance as passing. It all has to do with confidence. I still have yet to gain enough and have enough people to support me so that I can say eff the rest of the world, but in any case, I have a need to pass.

For those that can say I don't care, just treat me like a lady, I admire your courage.

SO ask yourself this....Why do you have this need to pass. You'll never (fool) (I don't like the term FOOL cu we are not trying to fool anyone,) everybody so you'll always have people clock you where ever you go.

So if you wait to go out like it sounds like you d want to, you may never get out. Just do your best and you'll learn how best to make yourself up as you go out more.

So my advice if you want to go out dressed , don't wait to be perfect cuz the longer you take the harder it could be to get out. Just my

[kimdl93]

SO ask yourself this....Why do you have this need to pass. ....... Just do your best and you'll learn how best to make yourself up as you go out more.

So my advice if you want to go out dressed , don't wait to be perfect cuz the longer you take the harder it could be to get out. Just my

I know what is is for me - basically fear of the unknown. the odd thing is that I've been experimenting with going out in a fairly obvious androgynous appearance - from the clothes I wear, my heels and a bit of make up. So, isn't it odd for me to come accross as a feminine man, but fear coming accross as a cross dressing man. Not sure that I'd be any different in the eyes of the beholder.

[Christina Horton]

I know what is is for me - basically fear of the unknown. the odd thing is that I've been experimenting with going out in a fairly obvious androgynous appearance - from the clothes I wear, my heels and a bit of make up. So, isn't it odd for me to come accross as a feminine man, but fear coming accross as a cross dressing man. Not sure that I'd be any different in the eyes of the beholder.

Ya its sound like you would stand out more dressed androgynously then if you were dressed fully. After all when your dressed as a women you blending better then just wearing the clothes eh. That's how I look at it. So if you want to go out fully dressed then go for it.

[Rita C.]

Christina, I would like pat you on the back, if more of us girls felt the way you do, we could all stand up and be proud of who we are. Oh, by the way I am very proud to be a Crossdresser and I'm not going to let any one change that.