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Thread: I got outed.......

  1. #26
    silicone member Danielle_cder's Avatar
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    Hello ther, sorry bout the outing I've been there, that browser history got me too! I think u handled it perfectly, if he is truly your friend then he should respect your privacy! Just think, one less person to come out too. Stay positive!
    the only limit that u set, is the one u set yourself.

  2. #27
    Gold Member Maria in heels's Avatar
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    Amy....a friend is just that...a friend. I hope that you can feel comfortable with him knowing - if everything stays the same, then you have a true friend. Think of it as a test
    A new link to a sample of my shoe collection

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  3. #28
    Fashionista LisaK's Avatar
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    Incognito mode in Chrome is your friend.

    No one except me uses my computer, generally, but I still always browse sites like this in Incognito because you never know when someone is going to say "hey, let me look something up quickly".
    "There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. "

    - Anais Nin

  4. #29
    Silver Member
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    I use Mozilla Firefox. It deletes the history when I sign out of it. I've developed the habit of logging off entirely when I am done with the computer. I never use IE. Another reason for logging off entirely is eBay. Even if I close out eBay without logging off, if the next user goes to eBay it will show the items you last viewed. My wife know I cross dress, but, no other family members (unless they've gone through the fourteen zerox boxes in the playroom).

  5. #30
    Silver Member ~Joanne~'s Avatar
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    As CD's, closeted or just want to keep it private for whatever reason, we are always at the risk of being outed. Browser history, pictures in a folder, (I recently bought a secure pen drive and now store them there), box of clothes hidden where ever, walking by a window dressed, neighbor peeking in the windows, etc etc etc. With this lifestyle, there are 1000's of different ways of being outed. All of this is just if you don't leave the house, imagine if you do.

    The thing about this post that bothers me most is trying to wrap my head around someone, anyone, using my PC. Beyond the history or pictures, you may have other things like banking and such you may not want anyone to see. So why even let someone use your PC?

    On the other side, I do use firefox myself and it doesn't keep a history, or any other traces of where I have been or what i was looking at. Maybe tweaking your PC might be a good idea at this point just to be on the safe side
    Don't ask for "honest opinions" if you can't handle an honest answer.

  6. #31
    Girl from the Eagles Nest reb.femme's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amy R Lynn View Post
    I just hope and pray that he doesn't open his big mouth, but I have my doubts. I'm not sure what will be the result of this. I hope that I don't loose friends over this. I don't know that I'm ready for that.....Not that I have much choice now. Only time will tell.
    Hi Amy,

    Oh bugg3r, is the only phrase that comes to mind. I'm as guilty really for my internet history, so it could yet be me. The laws of probability will always make sure that the worst person available will be the person that fate decides to spill your beans to.

    Strange, that in complete contrast to this post, that of Flic yesterday announcing to all her friends of her life style and then pondering whether the decision was the right one. At least that was her choice, where as yours was bad luck. At least you'll get to see how much of a friend he is or isn't, plus any others.

    Lets hope he can hold hold his tongue.

    Reb
    Flying high under the spell of life!



    http://rebsweb.co.uk

  7. #32
    Member Amy R Lynn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Joanne View Post
    As CD's, closeted or just want to keep it private for whatever reason, we are always at the risk of being outed. Browser history, pictures in a folder, (I recently bought a secure pen drive and now store them there), box of clothes hidden where ever, walking by a window dressed, neighbor peeking in the windows, etc etc etc. With this lifestyle, there are 1000's of different ways of being outed. All of this is just if you don't leave the house, imagine if you do.

    The thing about this post that bothers me most is trying to wrap my head around someone, anyone, using my PC. Beyond the history or pictures, you may have other things like banking and such you may not want anyone to see. So why even let someone use your PC?

    On the other side, I do use firefox myself and it doesn't keep a history, or any other traces of where I have been or what i was looking at. Maybe tweaking your PC might be a good idea at this point just to be on the safe side
    I agree there are many diffferent ways that we can be outed. It can and does happen all the time.
    As for letting someone use my PC. I have no problem letting a friend use my PC. I know I can trust them. That's why they are my friend. However, something like CD'ing could be a whole other can of worms! So.... time will tell. And no... I'm not going to sweat the things I have no control over. Let come what will. I'll just have to deal with it then.
    "Oh my God, I realized, it's not that we're screwed up; it's just that we've been trained to thnk so."
    ~Rick Novic, Alice in Genderland <-- GREAT BOOK TO READ!

  8. #33
    Member Amy R Lynn's Avatar
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    I thought I should update everyone on this thread. My buddy has been talking to me and acting like he has always acted. He never even said a word about any of the suff that we talked about. As far as all of this goes, we are the same as we ever were. It is amazing how your head does make things far worse than what they really are. I'm glad that this turned out ok.
    "Oh my God, I realized, it's not that we're screwed up; it's just that we've been trained to thnk so."
    ~Rick Novic, Alice in Genderland <-- GREAT BOOK TO READ!

  9. #34
    My avatar agrees Nicole Erin's Avatar
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    He is probably just trying to pretend it doesn't exist, I mean if he has a problem with it. I think you will be OK, just don't bring it up again.

    How funny would it be though in the car if one of those tranny-type songs came on (dude looks like a lady, man I feel like a woman, etc...)

    OK bad joke. Anyways, like I said, just don't rub his nose in it.
    It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.

  10. #35
    Member Ashley D.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amy R Lynn View Post
    I thought I should update everyone on this thread. My buddy has been talking to me and acting like he has always acted. He never even said a word about any of the suff that we talked about. As far as all of this goes, we are the same as we ever were. It is amazing how your head does make things far worse than what they really are. I'm glad that this turned out ok.
    I'm glad your friend isn't treating you any different.
    Like you said things can seem a lot more dramatic in your mind.
    I use to think the world would some how come to a end if I was outed.
    Now hay we are all still here n
    Always remimber life is what you make it.
    So make it Beautiful.

    Love Ashley Dawn
    http://m.facebook.com/?_rdr#!/ashley...00004093583692

  11. #36
    Chickie Chickhe's Avatar
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    The solution to dress up on halloween in front of all your friends. Have fun, show them a good time. That way it will be old news when your big mouth friend starts talking...
    Chickie

  12. #37
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    Two words that I live by when viewing any CD content "private browsing" with my browsers. Sorry to hear what happened.

  13. #38
    Junior Member Imeni's Avatar
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    I know that the people who come to this site have alot and share many of the same fears, with good reason. But the one thing that hasn't really been addressed is, are we all that self absorbed to think that every single person in our life is really gonna care? Granted, many will to some degree like wifes, very close friends, family. But what I took from this is a decently good friend that you've known for x amount of years found out in a very open way and just doesnt care. That you, even including this new information, is still the guy he has beers with on the weekend and goes fishing with when he can work it in. While yes, big, Crossdressing isn't this huge, giant world ending situation that everyone is going to take as a horrible, friendship ending situation.

    It is what it is. Just, remember to keep safe as not everyone in the world is as understanding as your friend.
    "Some people might suggest that I'm a closest-case Male to Female Crossdresser. I simply inform them that the doors to Narnia are open. Are you comfortable enough to take a trip through the armoire?"

    Visit my Facebook! Add me! I need friends! <3 - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1360871615

  14. #39
    Member ChristineReid's Avatar
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    I was discovered by my wife and it all turned out well - but obviously that's different. I do think - thought - that although it may seem tough and may have consequences in the short term it has allowed you to be more "you" in the world - which I think is what life is all about. You never know this could open up new doors that you never dreamed could be possible...
    Christine x - more pics on Flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/misschristinereid/

  15. #40
    Eagle and the Hawk
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    I once accidentally left my cell phone in the canteen at work one time. It was out of my possession for 30 minutes. It had pics of Tara in it too. I was in a panic covering my foot steps, a co worker handed it to me. Very close call. Later on, I deleted the Pics of Tara.
    Last edited by Tara D. Rose; 10-17-2012 at 05:00 PM.

  16. #41
    forever in pantyhose Jill's Avatar
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    My experience at this stage in our life is that being caught, discovered or outed is an inevitable reality. I've dodged many bullets and been hit by others. I'm fortunately at a place in my life where I feel like it's not that big of a deal anymore. I've found that it's impossible to always cover all my tracks. When I've gotten busted I look back and the things I could have should have done to avoid it but in the end, it really is inevitable. We're human and we overlook things.

    It's very hard to know, however, how people are going to react or what they are going to do. I had a "friend" who told me to my face that she wouldn't tell anyone and that she was totally accepting and supportive. Behind my back she told her mom and several of her friends and also told them that she didn't want to encourage me. The best thing we can do is just be right with ourselves when these things happen so we can easily move on.

  17. #42
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    My family and friends who visit occasionally use my PC so I use Firefox permanently set to private browsing so nothing is stored when I close it down. I have all the transgender sites I visit bookmarked in my head so no-one can inadvertently discover them and ask me awkward questions.

  18. #43
    Junior Member Ddannie's Avatar
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    Amy,
    I have no advice but I think your handling this really well. I guess it is just a matter of time before I have a similar experience and when I do it is good to know the support and wisdom of this group's members is here.
    D

  19. #44
    Banned Read only
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    you were doing a research paper studying CD'S and there behavior

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