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Thread: What Is Passable

  1. #1
    Joanie Leggs
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    Wink What Is Passable

    Hello all,
    In my encounters with sister online and in person I hear alot of chatter of being a Non passable T-Girl. Well I only one thing to say, Phooie on That!!!
    To any sister out there who thinks that they are not Pasable All I can say is go shopping sometime to the Mall or Just take a walk down a Busy street. and look at all the Diffrent types of Women out there!!!!!
    Some are Knock outs and some well are just plain. I know we all would Like to be knock outs But lets look at this a little closer.
    we want to blend in and not be made. so looking like a Paris Hilton Knock off or a Oversized Goldie Hawn. will draw Undue attention to us and subject us to riddicule. I would like your Input on this subject. and your feelings on what it takes to be passable. Bottom line is in order to be PASSABLE it is 20% Looks and 95% ATTUDE that adds up to 115% yes we have to work hard at this but who said life would be Easy
    sorry for the rambling. Kisses to all
    Joanie

  2. #2
    GypsyKaren
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    Joan
    You know, I agree with you about passing being more about attitude than looks.I think I pass to most of the people most of the time not because I'm beautiful but because I feel confidence in myself when I go out dressed.That's always been the key thing for me.Sure,we go to t- bars alot,but also straight ones,and I do a lot of my shopping dressed so I can try things on.I know I was made once by a clerk at the drug store,but she was comfortable with it and so was I,so I still felt like I "passed".Actually, I probably made her day,and I had a good chuckle about it afterwards.
    Also, I think most people you run across while you're out are to busy thinking about their own problems and things to pay much attention to someone passing through.At least that's how things have worked out for me.
    GypsyKaren

  3. #3
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    Passable

    You are exactly right. 50% of being passable is attitude. I was in the mall yesterday in femme and passing through the cosmetic section and many of the gg clerks are standing - looking and I noticed 2 looking at me (I have a habit of stoping and looking back to see who is looking) and noticed they "read" me. Before I would make haste and leave, now I turn around and approach them and ask them for their advise on how to better pass. I have got great information and I feel at ease. The first thing the girl said "stand up straight and don't be afraid to walk like a woman". Wow!
    Attitude, confidence is really important.
    Love.
    Stephanie.

  4. #4
    Artistically Feminine Ava Mouse's Avatar
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    Question Passing...

    Wow, this is like, the best thread on passing I've read in a long time!

    Stephanie, thanks for sharing your experiences! I wish I had the courage to ask that question to total strangers!

    My thoughts on passing:

    There's passing BEFORE you've been read. That's what most CD's are after, authenticity. But this is rare indeed.

    And there's passing AFTER you've been read. That's attitude and respect.

    Attitude: Once you've been read, how do you behave? Do you run away and hide? Or do you behave like you belong there?

    Respect: Respect is earned from dressing with honor & respect for women. Dress like a drag queen or a prostitute, and you'll not get respect. Dress like the average gal, and you'll get respect, even when read.

    My problem is that I over dress. Any GG that dresses like I do would get attention. That attention is what gets me read. But I'd hate to wear jeans and a T-shirt. It's not artsy enough for me.

    So, question... do I dress down and pass? Or do I dress up and express myself fully? hmmm...

    OK, here's my decision, thanks to everyone's feedback. Passing is secondary to my desire to express myself. I'd rather dress well and be read then pass in drabish GG clothing. Windy's feedback is perfectly stated, but my goal is to have fun wearing what I like. And having been out quite a bit, I'm quite comfortable being read.

    Besides, the more people see well dressed, well behaved crossdressers, the more we'll be accepted! In my daydreams, maybe we'll inspire more GG's to dress up more often!!!
    Last edited by Ava Mouse; 06-05-2005 at 02:39 PM.
    Ava Mouse - An artist experimenting with the medium of femininity...
    "Imitation is the most sincerest form of flattery."

  5. #5
    That's right, I did it Sharon's Avatar
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    My problem is that I over dress. Any GG that dresses like I do would get attention. That attention is what gets me read. But I'd hate to wear jeans and a T-shirt. It's not artsy enough for me.

    So, question... do I dress down and pass? Or do I dress up and express myself fully? hmmm...


    The answer, Ava, is to dress the way you want to dress, no matter how others think. I love your style of dress, and if I thought I could pull it off as well as you do, I would dress similarly.
    I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
    Marilyn Monroe

  6. #6
    Unofficial CD Mom Holly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ava Mouse
    ...So, question... do I dress down and pass? Or do I dress up and express myself fully? hmmm...
    I agree with your earlier statement that this is one of the best threads on passing I have read in a LONG time. But to your question, I would ask you to consider a third alternative... one that would provide you with the best of both worlds. And that is simply picking the venues you wish to attend and dressing appropriately for that venue. And even if the venue is one in which a more casual form of dress is tlhe norm, it certainly does not preclude us from still looking our best! I've see many GG's in casual attire (jean's and a nice top, i.e.) who still have beautifully applied makeup, hair arranged and in place, and nicely accessorized. In fact, paying attention to the details to maintain a feminine auora could raise the "art" to a new level... a cute bow or ribbon in the hair, an ankle bracelet, a pin on the top... you get the idea. And then there is the dfferent looks one can achieve with different aplication styles and techniques with makeup. So to your question, Ava, I would say maximize your artistic expression in whatever style of dress you choose to wear! No matter what, I'm sure you will look fabulous!
    Fulltime girl on the inside.
    Lipstick=confidence

    [FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4]Holly[/SIZE][/FONT]

  7. #7
    Platinum Member Wendy me's Avatar
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    i think that when you look at yourselfe and be honest ...do i pass???? you /we can answer that ....then if you dress to stick out then ...it's easyer to be read......most gg's just put together a few simple pieces sometimes we try to wear half of our closet out ....sometimes les is way more......how you feel abought yourselfe counts big time
    if your confident it helpes ....scared and shakeing ...thay can hear your knees nocking....your Attitude is what gets you through it.....

  8. #8
    Amelie
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sharon
    My problem is that I over dress. Any GG that dresses like I do would get attention. That attention is what gets me read. But I'd hate to wear jeans and a T-shirt. It's not artsy enough for me.

    So, question... do I dress down and pass? Or do I dress up and express myself fully? hmmm...


    The answer, Ava, is to dress the way you want to dress, no matter how others think. I love your style of dress, and if I thought I could pull it off as well as you do, I would dress similarly.

    Very good point Sharon, "Dress as you want to".

    That's why I feel comfortable going out in a T-shirt and jeans, It's what's inside you that counts. And attitude is what's inside of us.
    Amelie

    PS-Also, I can have a bad attitude. Lol

  9. #9
    Aspiring Member Imogen_Mann's Avatar
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    Smile In a prefect world...

    Here I sit... Six Ft Two inches tall, Ex railway shunting-yard worker and locomotive coupler, I mean to say I am a big person, I weigh 17 and a half Stone (about 245 lb's) 36 inch waist big shoulders, 18 inch neck, ... and I know for an absoloute fact... That I will never ever "pass"

    That said.... I'm not one who ever really felt the ever pressing need, it's not why I dress. I am certain that I am not alone however, in being someone that knows no matter what, short of miracle surgery (3 inches off my backbone, legs and arms please Doc... etc...) that it's just not gonna happen. I's never stopped me enjoying what I do though.
    In a perfect world, the whole clothing rights thing would be cool, and I could wear what I want... But I've long since accepted it's not gonna happen, so rather than asking society to bend to my wishes, I just do what I gotta do in spite of society, rather than in tune with it.

    I understand that for a lot of girls, going out dressed brings fear of attack... I'm thankfull that if I ever go out... and some retard try's to throw a punch at me for being different... theyre gonna come off worse. It's why I'm no longer afraid of the dark... the worst thing I could ever meet ... is ME


    XX

    Jayme.

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member
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    For a tranny to pass as a woman is a vitual immpossibility unless they are blessed with natural feminine features, which is very rare.

    I think the best most of us can hope for is to blend in, to not stand out as an obvious man dressed in womens clothes. I have been going dressed in public for 10 months now and to be honest most of the time I am ignored, not because I am passable it is mostly because people are simply not intrested and I hope to some degree I blend in by choosing quite low key clothes and trying to adopt the correct mannerisms such as walking and holding ones self in a feminine fashion.
    When it comes to a situation like dealing with shop assistants or ordering a drink or a meal then confidence is a truely major factor, not to pass but to send a message out that yes you are a tranny but you expect to be treated as a person and not as some kind of freak or second class citizen. It really is a show of confidence to show that you are not ashamed of being who you are.
    Hope that makes sense ........love mand xxx



    By the way I think that there are alot of trannies who are not passable but are really attractive, then again there are a lot of real girls who are obviously female and are quite unattractive. I think attractiveness and passability are two totally seperate things. So pretty does not equal passable, and passable does not equal pretty.
    Last edited by mand; 06-05-2005 at 01:01 PM.

  11. #11
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    Can you describe the last person you walked past in the street? Passing is in the head not in what you look like.Confidence is everything. I know it's not easy but practice makes perfect.
    Just get out there and be who you wanna be!!!!
    L&P
    Marie

  12. #12
    Bunny's submissive girl CharleneCD's Avatar
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    Do I pass? Maybe, maybe not. I agree with Ava's attitude and rerspect statements. As an example yesterday I met with a member of the local tri-ess society to be checked out for membership. There is no doubt in my mind that I was read by the waitress. She would not give me eye contact. But I looked good and acted as if I belonged so I had no trouble. She was still friendly even though she would not look me in the eyes. We had no trouble at all there.

    I know that there will be many here that will tell me that I am very passable. But I think I am begining to want just simple acceptance. even if given a bit grudgingly.
    Charlene

    Learn To Love Yourself And You will Find That Others Have Always Loved You But You Can Now Accept It.

  13. #13
    Member karen marie's Avatar
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    there are all shapes,looks and sizes of ggs out there.remember that
    femininity is so much more of a feeling than looks.
    hugs,karen

  14. #14
    Oldie but Goodie Mitzi's Avatar
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    I totally agree, dressing to fit and not being self conscious minimizes being read. Being CD, I tend to notice obvious signs of TG's when out in guy mode. I once walked past a girl without any signs of being T, but just happened to see her face. It was obvious, at least to me, she was a boy. But had I not inadvertently seen her face, I would never have noticed her in the crowd of people walking by.

    But that habit of looking for signs of T's backfires occasionally. I once in guy mode approached a pretty girl, dressed a bit too nicely in heels, who I just "knew" was a T and asked her if she was a T-girl. She looked at me with a smile, and asked in a most definitely femme voice..."What's a T-girl?"

  15. #15
    The Girl Next Door windycissy's Avatar
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    "Passable" is by definition the ability to pass as a woman.

    There are three essential elements:

    1. Physical features. Here I disagree with mand's observation that only a tiny minorty of men can pull this off. If you are built like an NFL linebacker or heavyweight contender, you obviously aren't going to be able to make it, but there are a lot of zaftig women out there, and if your goal is to pass as a real woman as opposed to your idealized image of the perfect woman, you have a shot. It helps to live in a city like Chicago - the "City of Big Shoulders" applies to both sexes here!

    2. Dressing right for the occasion. Here Ava is on the mark: unless you are going to a Hollywood premiere, dress down! If your objective is to pass as a woman at a suburban shopping mall, first go there and observe what the women are wearing, then put together an outfit like they're wearing. For example, before I figured out how to create feminine-looking hands, I always wore gloves, which was fine outdoors in January in Chicago but looks ridiculous inside a shopping mall, at least this time of year.

    3. Poise! No matter how fine you look, if you act like you're a guy, you will shatter the illusion. No matter how many times I do this, I always have butterflies when I first go out. One tip, if it's daytime: put on a pair of women's sunglasses before you head out the door. That way, you can look at people without appearing self-conscious, and see if they are staring at you in a funny way. If they are, you are not passable. If they aren't staring back at you, YOU ARE PASSABLE!

    Ask Windy

  16. #16
    Maturing Member JoAnnDallas's Avatar
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    I don't know if I am passable or not, but I have observed many women and
    have noticed a whole range. One case in point, I was watching "Monster Garage", and when they introduced the people on the team, one was a women. I blinked my eyes a couple of times, before I relized that I was really looking at a women. She had to be the most masucalan women, I have ever seen. Tall, large muscular build, low voice, and large breasts. She was wearing a tight t-shirt. She was either this or a TS that did not turn out right. Anyway it seem all the other men accepted her and the host Jesse James seem to treat her like any other women that has been on his show. I wondered how many men watching, thought that the women was a women or a man in drag??
    I believe what other are saying about dress normally as a GG would, don't go overboard. If you blend in with your surrounding, then you don't stand out, and then your passible.
    When possible, I wear a pair of large pair of persciption sunglasses. It hides a lot of my features and makeup hides the rest. This way I don't have to do a lot of makeup. Just a little foundation, lipstick, and rouse. The glasses hide my eyes so I don't have to put on eye makeup. It makes me a lot more passible and it allows me to look at others and judge what they are thinking, when they look at me.
    I usually take short walks out and the other day I was walking down the side sidewalk ( I live on a corner lot) and a lady came out and got her mail. She looked up at me for a moment, then turned around and when back inside.
    My heart rate was already racing just from the walk, and when she look at me, I almost frooze, and my hands did start to shake a little. But when she just turned around and went back inside, I kinda told myself, "Wow, did I look like a women to her??"
    I think being passible, it large part presentation, attitude, style, and confidence in your self.

  17. #17
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    the only reason I can't be passable, because of my height... I'm 6'3...
    When I was 18, people thought I was a girl This was really nice. And I didn't have to do anything, not even wear a makeup. I was really fragile (since then, I've gained lots of weight) I have female arms with no muscles... (I was teased a lot in HS, because I looked like a girl) I'm weak like a girl, but tall like a guy. I don't have beard shadow (I'd have to stop shaving for about 3 days, before it will be visible) was teased for that. I have narrow shoulders, but my hips aren't wide either. I'm not a female, but my brain doesn't have some of those little advantages, that males brain usually has... I've have comments from male friends, that I drive like a girl. I can't point to north, and can't follow directions from males... "oh yeah, you go south of the town, then turn on highway 52, follow it for 8 miles, then turn north..." that just doesn't work. I like to ask females for directions. "Do you know where boat shop is? Yep, that place right behind it" that works better for me. In my psychology class, we had lecture about differences of brains... Teacher passed some tests, just for fun. Then I discovered, I can't rotate 3d objects in my mind, but I can see even smallest difference in colors... I pretty bad in math, but know 3 (human) languages, pretty bad with Data Structure, but way better with networking... WHAT AM I?
    Why I am this way? I wish I could pass... I would love to at least for a couple of day to live like a woman... Now I look more like a guy, but in 2003 I was mistaken for a girl... Last time. I was in the car (i wasn't even shaved) with my male buddy, waiting for his girlfriend, and when she came, she said "I see you got a company, who is she?" The guy starts laughing. "This is a guy?" she said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you". I couldn't be more flattered. But I was in the car, she didn't see, how tall I was
    I've read all the posts in this thread, and it was really interesting to read them, many gals here were out and they sharing exvperience. Good exvperience, but I've never been out. I have no confidence... But I want to go out so bad, it is not even funny... Sorry, for this screwed up post, but even I don't know what am I Plus it is 4:30 in the morning

  18. #18
    Bunny's submissive girl CharleneCD's Avatar
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    For all us tall gals here is some hope for us. This was sent to me in an email.

    The tallest and biggest woman in the world lives in Holland. She is

    7'4" and weighs 320.



    Now, before you look at her pictures, get a mental image of what you

    Think a woman who weighs 320 looks like............



    Got it?



    Ready?



    Here goes................
    Attached Images Attached Images
    Charlene

    Learn To Love Yourself And You will Find That Others Have Always Loved You But You Can Now Accept It.

  19. #19
    Maturing Member JoAnnDallas's Avatar
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    Only one words come to mind.


    [SIZE=5]DAMM[/SIZE]

  20. #20
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    Wow! she is really good looking, for 320lbs and 7'4... That makes me feel a little better. Maybe some day, I will be able to pass? Maybe someday I will find 6'3 GF, and her shoe size will be 13

  21. #21
    Automatic tranny Ashley Allison's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CharleneCD
    For all us tall gals here is some hope for us. This was sent to me in an email.

    The tallest and biggest woman in the world lives in Holland. She is

    7'4" and weighs 320.



    Now, before you look at her pictures, get a mental image of what you

    Think a woman who weighs 320 looks like............



    Got it?



    Ready?



    Here goes................
    Holy moly. Can you say breeding stock? Her kids could be NBA players for sure. :duh:

    Edit: or WNBA players

  22. #22
    Bunny's submissive girl CharleneCD's Avatar
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    BunnyGG is lucky im in love with her, or its off to Holland for me. with my 6' 3" in heels id look normal.
    Charlene

    Learn To Love Yourself And You will Find That Others Have Always Loved You But You Can Now Accept It.

  23. #23
    Math Witch Stephanie Brooks's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CharleneCD
    For all us tall gals here is some hope for us. This was sent to me in an email.

    The tallest and biggest woman in the world lives in Holland. She is
    7'4" and weighs 320.



    Now, before you look at her pictures, get a mental image of what you
    Think a woman who weighs 320 looks like............

    Got it?

    Ready?

    Here goes................
    Oh. My. Gawd. She's adorable!
    Stephanie

    Mac - It really does Just Work

  24. #24
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    Wow
    She can probably see me in England from up there !!!
    L&P
    Mariej
    xx

  25. #25
    That's right, I did it Sharon's Avatar
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    Gads -- she would be the perfect girlfriend! Not only is she gorgeous, but no one would ever notice what I'm wearing when we walked side-by-side.
    I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
    Marilyn Monroe

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