What is the attraction of going out dressed

I have gone out a lot in the not so distant past. I never really thought I could pass, let alone blend in, so my very first forays were made without much effort at "concealing" my more masculine features....(not that one!)

I found that I enjoyed just being out in the real world and engaging people. I've said it before and I'll risk repeating myself: Getting all dressed up and sitting by myself at home came to feel like confinement. I wanted to do the things I enjoyed....dining, shopping, occasionally having a drink and listening to music, site seeing and traveling as myself.... Getting out felt like, and feels like "freedom".

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Originally Posted by confused_cathreen

Thank you Steffi for creating this thread, you are right, my question was limited to specific kind of CDers as it served a particular purpose. Reading your stories though made me wonder: does it make you feel good to be acknowledged when out and about? I went back to my own experiences and realised that women as a rule don't compliment others easily. I have never stopped someone in the street to compliment her on putting on a good look. I don't think I would do it with a CDer, I guess that's the price you pay if you want to be like everyone else 😉. Or does it make you uncomfortable to get attention? Bear in mind that attention comes both positive and negative and all of us flip a coin, not just CDers.

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I go out en femme several times a week to do a variety of things. I enjoy being treated as a woman. I also enjoy receiving compliments, usually from women. I think that I look much better as a woman and can not remember ever receiving a compliment as a man! No one ever compliments a man on his looks, especially an older man!

"What is the attraction of going out dressed?"
Some simple times in my 20s and 30s to show some of the salesgals what I looked like in person all dolled up.
To show them the difference between a crossdresser (me) and a transvestite.
Liking the responses I got from them.
Pass as a woman? No, not at all.
Just enjoying the stores during the day when less people are around. Matinee movies too.
To experience walking in heels more then just inside the house.
Feeling the breeze that would flow up my skirt/dress that gave a gentle cooling effect down there that only women would also know.
Watching my ample false breast jutting out proudly in front and slightly bouncing as I walked was another joy to behold.
The heaviness of wearing false eyelashes along with the slickness of lipstick on my lips was also a treat to me.
All of this is the attraction to be out as the crossdresser that I am

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My comment on Cathreen's thread got bounced. I ask her whether or not my comment passed muster. No, but, I'm glad this thread was started. There are degrees of venturing forth into the world. Does one go to venues and interact with other humans? Or does one still try to maintain secrecy while leaving the confines of the abode. Only on Halloweens have I gone out with the intent of soliciting responses or at least knowing there was the strong possibility of interaction. It was buying doughnuts at a Winchell's Donut House and buying soda at Safeway. A nice comment from a female cashier at Winchell's. Nothing said either way from a female cashier at Safeway, although there was a burst of laughter from a young half drunk male. But it was Halloween, and, my inner self was not riled.

Over the years I have taken drives fully en femme which did include nail polish and full facial makeup. I loved the feel of the breeze caressing my legs and playing with the skirt of my dress and slip. Other times it was sans makeup and nail polish. I viewed those as too much of a bother applying and removing. Still I make reasons to get out of my car. It may be to drop off a book and the night return slot at a library. Or grab a free newspaper. Mail a letter. Buy a can of soda outside a Safeway. Or just take a long stroll in the evening. It has been my intent to avoid any interact because the purpose of my outings is to enjoy the serenity wearing and appearing as much as a woman as I can achieve, and, not be engage in any interactions. As I chicken as many would venture to suggest? I do not believe so. If wearing women's clothing is strictly a private affair with no objective to disturb tranquility, then I do not believe I am chicken.

Yes, I have toyed with the idea I may be involved in an accident, even on those residential side streets, but, that is a risk. I could also have a coronary and end up in an ER. But, that is an acceptable risk. Of course, I could have that coronary at home when alone and pass away fully en femme. That's an acceptable risk. I do not feel I would gain any inner feeling of tranquility engaging sales clerk fully en femme on an ordinary Saturday night.

I have no idea why I do what I do. I know what wearing women's clothing makes me feel. It may be a self imposed limitation, but, I do not feel anything is lacking. So, today while my wife is at work until 4 PM I am fully en femme doing domestic chores; washing my dainty laundry and making macaroni salad for tonight's dinner. I hope I don't stroke out and die on the kitchen floor before she comes home.

I haven't gone beyond my yard dressed, but lots of people have seen me dressed in my house and yard so I felt like I shouldn't have replied to Cathleen's thread. If there was no issues between gender and clothes, I would wear skirts most of the time. They are comfortable and I like how they look and move. So the attraction for me to wear them out is just to wear what I like. I spent most of my life denying this part of me, and now that I have accepted myself it is freeing to go out and show the world this is me. But at the same time I don't want any attention :)

I go out to enjoy my Sophie time,sometimes on my own but generally with my 2 best friends.I don't pass but on the whole I get by without any difficulties.Its just so much fun getting a chance to enjoy this major part of me

I go out to validate me.
I enjoy interacting with the muggles and spreading knowledge about our culture.

Plus, I really like showing the world what Jodie looks like!

A very good question and I too would like to have contributed to the other thread but couldn't. I go out mostly because I love it. I love the feeling of being seen as a woman. I love the thrill and excitement of that first moment when I step out. I love the preparation, putting on makeup, trying on clothes, accessorising. I love going out with a bunch of girls the camaraderie the feeling of belonging. I love going out to blend and just be another woman out there.... I could go on

I don't bother to fully dress at home, but I do when going out. It's such a good feeling walking around all dressed, make up, earrings, wig. Because I don't pass and I'm still in the closet, I usually go out at night. I don't want to push my luck too much.

I dress to enjoy, not really to impress. As much as I know the ladies at Lane Bryant know my true gender, I love being addressed as Ma'am and being able to experience the dressing room.

On a recent trip to New Orleans, I went farther than I ever have before. I spent two days doing not a single thing in male mode. I went shopping, went to the movies, out to dinner, and also spent the day at the WWII museum. That museum is a MUST, by the way...simply amazing. At the end of the second day, it was time for me to check in to my hotel, because the next day would start a 3 day IT conference. I parked my truck on Canal, adjusted my forms, fed the meter, and walked to the desk to check-in. The young lady looked at my license, then at me, then my license...and smiled, "if it wasn't for the HAIR". I was so elated, I could barely contain myself. I thanked her so much for the flattery.

I used to try to go to gay bars to watch the drag shows, just so I could go somewhere I thought I "belonged". But, I found that I really don't belong there. I'm straight, and 100% devoted to my wife. I don't judge or look down on those establishments, I just don't feel comfortable. I like what Elizabeth said about wanting to be perceived as a woman, at least to the best of her abilities. That's me. Every once in awhile it takes me a few minutes to gather my nerves and get out of the truck. But, for the most part if I'm far enough away from home, I just get out and have fun. I do worry about confrontations sometimes, mainly because I don't have anyone I can enjoy this with, so I'm always alone. But, I do have a License to Carry, and almost always have a "purse pistol" with me (drinking is the exception, then it's illegal). So, I do have some comfort there. Sure, I may be forced out of the closet when I explain my attire to the Grand Jury, but at least I'll be alive to do it. :D

Sorry...I'm rambling. :) Happy Father's Day to everyone who is one!

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Originally Posted by ellbee

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Was a heck of an experience, and wouldn't have traded it for the world. Definitely needed it during that part of my life. These days? Not so much. I came, I saw, I went. :)

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Apart from the 'these days not so much' i think I could have that on my gravestone!:gn:

Just me being me.

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Originally Posted by Becky Blue

A very good question and I too would like to have contributed to the other thread but couldn't. I go out mostly because I love it. I love the feeling of being seen as a woman. I love the thrill and excitement of that first moment when I step out. I love the preparation, putting on makeup, trying on clothes, accessorising. I love going out with a bunch of girls the camaraderie the feeling of belonging. I love going out to blend and just be another woman out there.... I could go on

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Becky, you have described my feelings almost perfectly! I would only add that the desire to dress and go out is always tinged with a worry that I will be outed and embarrassed publicly. Knock on wood, but it has not happened yet. Also, I envy your apparent access to female camaraderie. That's something I would love to have. I had a great weekend in public in an art gallery, grocery shopping, Home Depot and a movie, but alone. I'd dearly like to share a feminine clothes shopping trip with a gg or two.

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Originally Posted by ReneeTX

I used to try to go to gay bars to watch the drag shows, just so I could go somewhere I thought I "belonged". But, I found that I really don't belong there. I'm straight, and 100% devoted to my wife. I don't judge or look down on those establishments, I just don't feel comfortable.

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That's my experience as well, Renee. It's not that we're made to feel unwelcome, but a crossdresser in a gay bar will be often be conspicuously ignored. Now, that's not to say that their are not establishments and occasions where we are conspicuously welcomed. The Houston girls will be hitting a few this weekend. Just sayin'. :)

Dressing up as a woman is part of me and part of my complex personality. Going out is something I need to do. I like the attention, I like the feel of my dress touching my legs, I like watching myself in the window reflexion. I also like to interact with people, especially when dressing won't be the subject of any conversation.
I love to shop as a female for my clothes and to interact with the SA people.
Dressing and going out is a thearpy for me and healing my inner balance.

Do I pass, most of the times I think I do, leaving perhaps sometimes the question whether I'm a man or a woman.
Do I care about passing? No very much, not enough to worry about it.

I live my life, when going out I respect my wife's wish that I do it far away from home to not get recognized.

Presenting as female gives me the feeling that I can be beautiful and pretty, as a man I'm not.
I like compliments a lot and I do get them from women, men and couples, it built up my confidence and self esteem.

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Originally Posted by Aunt Kelly

That's my experience as well, Renee. It's not that we're made to feel unwelcome, but a crossdresser in a gay bar will be often be conspicuously ignored. Now, that's not to say that their are not establishments and occasions where we are conspicuously welcomed. The Houston girls will be hitting a few this weekend. Just sayin'. :)

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I can much relate to this statement. I also used to go to gay bars because I felt, the drag queens and other CD are just like me. I realized that I have my own little femme world and don't need to go to those places.
Most times I go to any place where any women would go, bars, cafes, restaurants, the movies, whatever.

I don't go out as much as I used to, but from the get-go it was just instantly, instinctively important to me to go out. And I wasn't satisfied with being out of the house, nor was I all that interested in passing. I actually kinda wanted people to know i was something in between guy and girl, and I wanted to interact with people that way, to experience the usual and unusual as Sherri. Over the years I've experienced just about every variation of friendly, unfriendly, tolerant and intolerant, accepting and not, welcomed and ignored, and I used to be pretty wrapped up in all that, fretted about it waaayyy too much. Now I don't really give a rip as long as people aren't hateful, I don't have many expectations, I just savor the tremendous stimulation and fulfillment of venturing out and being the quixotic gender mashup I am. ;-)

Hi Steffi :hugs:,

~~~~~ SEE LINE #2 IN MY SIGNATURE ! >ORCHID...:daydreaming:...

The attraction for me is wanting to be true to my inner girl by letting her go out. It's like needing a 'fix.' I've never used illegal drugs, but I imagine going out would be like having to take heavier drug doses to get your fix. Its just something a girl has to do, go out, to get her fix for needing more. Make sense?

I love to go places as a woman because it’s so much fun! For years I was deeply closeted, until my living situation finally gave me the opportunity. When I first ventured into the real world, there were plenty of embarrassing moments, until gradually through trial and error I figured out how to dress and present myself more femininely (losing a ton of weight really helped) tone down my makeup, find a really attractive wig, etc etc. Now when I walk out the door I feel confident, and that really helps more than anything. So why do I do it? Like I said, it’s fun! Going shopping for dresses and stuff is a wonderful experience, meeting other like minded individuals for drinks, dinner, sports etc is a total blast, and just experiencing what it’s like to wear a skirt on a windy day is part of the fascination for me.

I do so because I receive complements (not all the time of course), and some people have done a double-take when they spot me. It's a secret thrill.