It's been awhile but I need advice

Well, I'm getting ready for work and so don't have the time to read all of the answers others have posted, so I hope I'm not going to duplicate three of them!
Something's missing - I might have a clue. I could be 100% wrong but I'll throw it out there anyway. Something most of us want to do, is to be outside, in the real world as female. Sitting around the house, especially with someone you love and can talk to is a wonderful and worthwhile thing, but it's a little like being in jail - you "can't" go outside. You read it over and over here, and I myself have done it when young, where we sneak the door open, peak outside, take two or three steps down the sidewalk, then run like hell if someone is coming. It might just be that she wants to do more than sit in the house.
There are a few options. The dress and drive is a good one assuming you have a reliable car and can get out of the drive way with out being made by the neighbors! :-) Your moving at 60 MPH so you don't have to worry about being 100% passable. There are also a number of clubs in most areas that are friendly.
The bad news from your perspective is that it is addictive. Once you start spending time out in the real world, sitting around the house dressed just isn't going to cut it anymore, so if you open that door be prepared.
Kim ( or Matt, what ever the hell my name is!)

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Originally Posted by SherryLynn GG

...He says he feels like something is missing. ...
Typically when he dresses I have nothing to do with it, i'll surf the net or watch a movie while he showers and becomes Paige. After he's dressed he'll ask how she looks and I give compliments, we take a few pics and then he gets online and chats or surfs the net while I watch a movie or whatever....
...Anyway back to him saying something is missing, he said he wishes I would be more involved. Not just sexual either, involved in helping him dress etc. And I want to be.
...I think my biggest problem is he wants me to be the dominate one in the relationship, not always mind you, just when he's paige. ...

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How to interact with them dressed, that is the question. Think how long it took when you were dating to become comfortable around each other. Even though he's still the same guy underneath, Paige & you are building a new relationship. That just takes time and practice.

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Originally Posted by Satrana

This may sound silly, but it sounds like both of you are trying too hard to be considerate of each other's feelings, the end result being that neither of you can step forward and take control so no progress gets made....

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That pretty much sums up the general tone of most "Me & Darlene" time.

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Originally Posted by SherryLynn GG

... I think it has to do with me more than the dressing...

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Any GG who says some of the issues are not because of her own insecurities and anxieties is dillusional. Takes 2 to make a relationship & 2 to make a fight.

I completely understand your concerns, SherryLynn. It's really pretty boring to be the chauffeur & photographer. We just don't get the same "thrill" from it as they do. It's foreign to us with no script or guide book. They are still somewhat embarassed and self-conscious around us for obvious reasons and quite frankly you just can't pounce on them 'cause it ruins the hair & makeup that took 3 hours to apply. What's a girl to do with a high-maintenance gurl? Out of town trips are good, but get expensive after awhile.

As far as dom/sub, you have to be comfortable either way and as GG, some days we're just not in to make-believe. On the days you are - go for it!

Sorry I don't have any clear answers, and if you find them, please share :D

Sherylynn the best advice I can give from what I have read is start slow. Have her do off the wall chores or some thing to start. Or tell her sit with you and watch the movie even if she don't like it. If he is normally the domanate one then just start by reverseing the small things you do and work into it is what I am saying worked for me and my SO might work for you. Other then that. I wish you luck and he/she is lucky to have you.

the frist thing to do is to find out what he means by "missing" you don't know. So begin, find a place were you're both comfortable, and intimate, and Find out what he thinks is missing.
I have a wonderfully supportive SO who shares this with me fully. And still at times something is missing, in most cases its connection and the ability to share it fully. To address this we sometimes in Drab just sharethe fourm and chats and emails. She sit with me and we read and discuss togather, we have made friends, Also CDers and go out togather, sometimes we have to travel several hours for it but boy is Dinner out in the real world with accepting supportive others worth it. We go to CD events togather, and have makeovers and pics togather. As mentioned in another post it is addictive. But your out there, you are yourself, you're whole, accepted, having fun without constraints.
Dom/sub With this, talk, get clear, what is he looking for, is it to be dominated ,or to be able to let go some times, and not be responsible. Would you quilify your "normal hetro" relationship with "Hin" as dom/sub. Maybe he just want to be where you are sometimes. A more equal relationship, for both of you. We are all human, we all have the same qualities and strengths in us, it just in certian situations we've repressed those feelings and actions because they were not socially proscribed or acceptable and for some might be unsafe. IE. girls don't ask boys out, girls don't initiate kisses, good girls don't... and men are sexually agressive, men are in charge, its all Bull we are people with fellings and a desire to express and experience those fellings
So if you want to try being bigger in the relationship Talk with him about it. Tell him you don't know how, tell him you are just learning and its going to take time, weeks, months, years, you don't know exactly what it will look like but it will be truly you, the parts you stuffed. That if he wants something like that he has to adapt to that part of you as it develops and grows and like a woman he will have to wait paitently on you as you grow. Also ask him to be aware of himself as he grows into this.
My So and I are doing this we are three years into it and it is freeing, unbelieveably rewarding, we understand each other better, and we have a much more equal relationship. She and I have a greater range of expression allowing us to be true to where we are at that moment.
But begin by talking getting clear with each other and then stay engaged every day. Accept dressing as a normal every day part of you relationship as it is with him, just like his job and don't put it in a box and treat it as differnt or a "Special" thing, its not.

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Originally Posted by SherryLynn GG

Thats what I want to do, but hubby says i'll never do it because im not dominate enough to tell him/her what to do...*sigh* what will I ever do!! lol

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Would you mind if I mentally whap him upside the head? On the one hand he's encouraging you to do something different, but then he tells you that you'll never do it. I know when people give me mixed messages like that I get confused and end up not doing anything. Does he give you any other mixed messages?

The first thing I would do is tell him to stop sending mixed messages. Until he changes his tune, it looks like it's up to you to say "yes I can". And I believe you can. You've got something you'd like to do. Give yourself a good pep talk, tell yourself you can do it, and do it.

Domination can be lots of fun. My wife and I switch from dom to sub, I think I prefer being the dom thou. The mostinportant thing to remember is < Its roll playing.

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Originally Posted by SherryLynn GG

I think my biggest problem is he wants me to be the dominate one in the relationship, not always mind you, just when he's paige. I have a major shyness about me. I can talk about things i'd like to do while he's dressed and such but when it comes down to it I cant do it. I think im also worried "OMG what if someone finds out" Which I know I know its our bedroom who cares what anyone else thinks.

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You might consider reading "The Sexually Dominant Woman: A Handbook for Nervous Beginners" by Lady Green. Available at Greenery Press on line. It's a 'light' read. It's helped many couples I know learn how to bring some "play acting" D/S into their relationship.FTR, I have no financial interest in Greenery Press, but I've known Janet Hardy for years, and the company is reputable.

That's a difficult dilemma. The problem is that we live in a society that hates this sort of thing, and there's no real rational reason for it, so plenty of people go against the grain and dress as they want, your hubby being one of them.

My advice is to help him get over that horrible shamefulness. Society is weird about something that is just another facet of your husband's personality, and can be a fun, sexy thing which is completely cool and in no way a problem. The only problem is the dickheads who will hassle you about it, but they are not freethinkers and will never understand this, so worry not about them. Just make sure you don't have to go to places they are, which is lots of places really.

That might seem a bit unreal but if you think about it objectively, there is nothing wrong with taking on other gender roles, so long as you are a decent, educated, moral person. Anyone who says differently is a moron, but many crossdressers understandably still feel shame. The key is getting rid of that shame, and if your husband likes to be dominated when he's dressed, indulge him or let him at least fantasise about it, he won't mind if he's not ashamed of himself.