Mine says "Shredded Wheat", but I'm not sure how to take that really.
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Mine says "Shredded Wheat", but I'm not sure how to take that really.
To me, it's not so much that the term itself is derogatory, as much as it has now become sort of the title of a specific fetish, and it's a fetish that equates femininity with weakness, submissiveness, and humiliation. I don't really like what it represents, I can't shake the air of misogyny and, I feel, some self-loathing transphobia within it.
So, as far as the old schoolyard slur goes, no I don't let stuff like that get to me, don't give words power and they have no power over you. But when it comes to self-identification, I prefer not to be confused with that other segment.
Well, there aren't too many opinions on this are there? But back to the real OP:
We? No. There is nothing that everyone can agree on that We would all call ourselves. But each individual has a choice to call themselves whatever they want.Quote:
Originally Posted by brassieres
Just another thing for overly sensitive people to be sensitive about. I haven't been called a sissy since I was in Junior High, but if somebody were to try and insult me with that word, I would just look at them and say "is that the best you can do?" like Steve Martin in Roxanne, "you have THIS to work with and the best you can think of is sissy?".
I'm a pariah in some trans circles because I have no issue with the word "tranny". Whatever. Words only have the power that you give them and I'm not 12 years old anymore, so I'm no longer in the business of investing in other people's hate.
I guess it's moot since there is no such thing as a TG hivemind and not everyone will agree.
Thank god though, can you imagine the attack ads when trying to choose the queen bee?
"Sissy" implies someone who is weak-willed and is a namby-pamby. We on the other hand have the courage to break out of the rigid mould imposed on men in our society.
A sissy is someone who drinks Arbor Mist "wine".
A sissy is someone who drinks Coors light "beer".
A sissy would want to wear the mousy clothing and shoes as shown in Haband instead of the bolder clothing and shoes in Jessica London.
John
I had a hard time as a child because for some reason a lot of my friends and members of my family that I looked up to called me a 'sissy'. I struggled my entire childhood trying to prove how much of a boy I was. I needed my father's support and approval. I got into wrestling and weight lifting. Now that I'm older and want to present more as a woman I regret taking up those sports. I've had a hard time having to live down being called a 'sissy'. Being forced into girl's clothes one summer afternoon was highly embarrassing. Being used as a dress model by my mother was hard to live down. Having an uncle of mine show around a picture of me at 3 1/2 yrs of age in a baptismal gown two Christmases ago brought up many of my relatives memories of me when I was less than boyish. It is to me a very derogatory term. I speak from experience.
Personally I don't like the term - being applied to me at least. I suppose it's horses for courses though; if you feel as if you should be called "sissy" then that's up to you.
I don't really identify myself as a sissy. If someone wishes to call themselves that, that's their call.
IMHO referring to ourselves as "sissies" is very degrading!
Quick search: 130 of our 19000 members promote themselves as sissies by including the term in their username. Quite the minority it seems :P
That would seem to settle the matter ;), Thanks for dong the research, Bree!Quote:
Originally Posted by Bree_K
But those stats are wrong. Variants of the word, sissy, sissi, sissie bring a total of: - 284 out of a total of : -33,241 members ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by kimdl93
Thanks for doing the additonal verification, Tamara! Now perhaps the subject will at last be put to rest!Quote:
Originally Posted by Tamara Croft
lol... but I think that may be a little off. Is the total members number you have including banned, and closed accounts? Just wondering because the member list shows 19126 members. Not that it matters, it's still less than 1% :PQuote:
Originally Posted by Tamara Croft
Banned members aren't counted in the total, besides, there are no members with that name banned. And you can only see the members who have posted, not the members who have a 0 post count. I don't need to sit and count them, I just to a search in the admin panel and it brings up the total for me ;)
B, I haven't read a single post beyond MsArlene's, and I don't have to.Quote:
Originally Posted by brassieres Should We Refer To Ourselves as Sissies?
In a word, "NO." Period.
I don't consider myself a sissy nor do I consider GG's to be sissy's.
I don't consider myself a sissy. I like to put on a dress or skirt with panties and bra from time to time. I call myself a mild cross dresser since I don't dress much.
Not as a group of crossdressers. I'm sure there are sissy forums for those that choose to be in that sub classification. From what I see, a sissy also considers their self a bottom or sub and many want to be degraded. I don't mean to offend anyone and if I'm wrong let me know.
The word has it's place, but the answer is NO.
From my experience I find that "sissy" and its implications is a turn-on for some, and for others is a turn-off. I would suggest that if you like calling yourself that you should, and that you should only call others that after having determined that they would like you too.
Love,
Betty
No! Absolutely not! You first have to pay your dues. You first need to experience the slaps to the back of the head on the school bus, the trips in the hallway, the books slapped out of your hand, being pushed down the stairwell, the girls laughing at your pathetic attempts to show interest, your pant pulled down if front of everybody... beatings and humiliations without end. You need to be called, in addition to “sissy”, fairy, pansy, pu$$y, dweeb, dork, faggot, queer, homo... and you have to come to believe it. You must one day realize that you really do belong with all your freaky friends: scrubs, fats, nerds, nose pickers and pants wetters. You're happy the day you were picked before your friend the fat kid for the soccer team. Then there is the sobs under the covers, the self hate, the depression, suicide obsession, counselors and doctors, medications, psych wards and hospitals, addictions and alcoholism until you are standing at the edge staring into the abyss deciding whether to jump.
If you come through all of that, THEN you can look in the mirror and say, “I am a sissy, but unlike my tormentors, I'm not a coward or a weakling.” I don't hide behind authority or numbers. I can't fight but I don't back down. A male but not a man, girly but not a girl, I am my own gender. You can't just throw on some frilly frock and call yourself a sissy. It has to be earned.
:love:
This word interests me because of the implications associated with it, I'm repelled by it but also intrigued.
Often used as a label of derision for boys who express the same emotions as girls such as crying or showing in some way their feelings have been hurt or a reluctance to be injured or avoiding aggressive behavior and acts this was a powerful tool in forcing men to shut down emotionally to prepare them for a future of violence.
The word has been adopted as a symbolic label of extreme passivity but this creates a paradox because if you are able to "act passive" than you really are not because the reality is true passivity is not an act but a statement of circumstance so by default not a choice.
To act passive is to make a slave out of the master, this is a very powerful ability because it's power is hidden from the master who thinks they are the one in a position of power. Aspects of feminine seduction use this to extreme advantage as well as certain children to manipulate adults with, it is a relationship of two different forms of complementary power.
I understand the disgust and revulsion with the concept because to willingly or unwillingly be submissive,humiliated and dominated can be terrifying and appears to be a disease that is anti-life but the word and the idea behind it has hidden powers.
The concerns I have are that the acts are used to repeat childhood traumas in an attempt to make acts of past evil normal to heal a shattered sense of ones own value, this keeps the victim living as a perpetual victim.
Jive turker on rye is right on point. I am a sissie but only in the coloqual sense where familiar conversations and common references might include me.If to be
a sissie is to mean the group that frequents cd.com for insight and answers for what and why they are, then I am one.My neighbor referes to me as" his
sissie next door", so in effect, he, by coloring me a dimunitive, can take a sort of ownership of me..HIS sissie next door(?). If you happen to look at the
images on Flicker, in a lot of cases, those who call themselves sissies are so far removed from the beauty of transvestism, that some of the images
will make you blush... If dressing up in a pink baby outfit with an oversized diaper on with bib and mathing hat, sucking on a pacifier makes you a sissie
then the tempeture has been taken....this hackneyed word and term should forever be discontinued.....dana
"Sissy" is a subculture of CD'ers that is primarily into S&M, submisson and the whole sissy maid thing, gay or straight. It's not really my bag, though in do confess to owning a few frilly little girl style dresses that some interpret as "sissy"
I'm not happy with the term sissy either.
When I am out & about, I just simply want to be the other gender.
NO! I was called that enough in grade school. It hated it then and I hate it now. The ladies are right it is a term used to describe a fetish. Unless you are a fetishist then it is a derogatory term. Please don't sling the word around in public because it paints a bad picture for those of us who aspire to general acceptance by others.
I, like many people, have been through similar situations and would never consider myself a sissy.Quote:
Originally Posted by LilSissyStevie
Being bullied and having issues doesn't make you a sissy. But if that's what you want to call yourself, go right on ahead ;)
Quote:
Originally Posted by brassieres
Nope, enough people call us sissies already.
We are vixens.:)
purple8229. Both me and my neighbors homes are completely under water, neither he nor I can sale, rent or move. We are, because of the housing
crisis, linked to one-another. It is commonly understood that I am the odd-ball in the neighborhood so most of the neighbors just nod their heads-
good morning style, but stay their distance...........Since I am KING, I dont accept their beer guzzling, deer meat barbequeing, loud music blaring,
jersey wearing, fire cracker exploding, big bellied wisecracks thank you..BEING A CROSSDRESSER MEANS THAT WE ARE BETTER THAN
EVERYONE ELSE.............dana lol
Not sure... I'm never up that late.:)Quote:
Originally Posted by Scarlet Rose
The OP asked if we should (generically, added for clarity) call ourselves sissies. The answer to that question is no, but the reason is clearly that the term sissy is specific to a subset of crossdressers that has specific qualities, and those who choose this specific area of crossdressing should be able to use this term to explain their niche. It also should not be used generally since most crossdressers are not in that niche, so the "label" would be incorrect.
Simple :)
tina
I don't like the term at all. It's kind of personal because it doesn't apply to me at all. I'm a regular guy who puts on outfits and wigs for fun. In fact, I was called a bro recently
NO & NO, it is a negative that boys like to say about young boys that don't fit in the cookie cutter, it hurts when your young and they call you sissy, growing up it hard enough, so let not call us girls sissy,and try to stop this, it is another way of bulling.
well i think this is America...and eaven as messed up as we are right now,we all,each of us,can call ourselves whatever we want.I can understand the subissive wanting to be called a sissie... but i dont think that there will ever be a chance that crossdressers as a group would ever agree to a term that has already caused a lot of suffering in the lives of a lot of us as stated above.Add to that its derogitory nature,and,well,eaven though i may or may not do a lot of things that most of mainstream america would refer to as "sissy", ive also had to pull my finger off a 10d galvanized framing nail out of a nail gun( poke to karen h)...electrical taped it and finished the 12 hr day...then gone home to care for my dying wife and 2 young boys at the time.(In boyshorts if i remember correctly)so in my opinion if "we" were to choose a name i suggest something that would a.make gg's smile and b. be a good poke in the ribs to the namecallers :)
"Should We Refer To Ourselves as Sissies?" That was the starting question. If this means all of us in this forum then the reply is surely (no). On the other hand " I " would SO love to be a sissy for a strong woman.
And yes I know that is a different forum. hehehe
My understanding is that "Sissy" is a submissive crossdresser. Since I own my femininity, I'd prefer not to be referred to as such.
"Sissy" is either of my two least hairy siblings, neither of which acts like a 'sissy'. i've had 'girly boy' from a co-worker, never bother to correct him, but also shut him down very quickly when he crossed the line into actually trying to be nasty about it- not appropriate to discuss it here- but it was put up or shut up. He backed off, and we got along for years until i left that company.
Derogatory names by themselves are not a big deal, but the disrespect they foment when used by persons outside that named group- that's not good. Thus, it's better not to call someone a name or label with negative connotations- unless you know they understand it is coming from you as a friendly tease only.
Thin ice at best, i'd stay off it unless you know for sure. And i'd recommend against pushing anyone else out on the ice.... since you asked.
"Vixen" sort of implies that our femininity is all we have going for us. You really want to go that route? After that movie about the pig, I'm not even sure if I want to be referred to as "Babe".
And I definitely don't get the whole "Sissy" fetish, so that's definitely off the table.
I am most certainly not a sissy. To me the term implies being weak. My feminine side looks up to strong, confident women, not weak ones. If someone is into being a "sissy" for roleplay then have fun playing that game but if people who see me as a sissy are in grave error.
I would disagree with you of what a sissy is. True, I am a crossdresser. I am also a submissive to my SO. No, it's not a game to us. It's how we interact with each other in everyday life. I do not see myself as a sissy, nor does my SO. I strongly dislike that term and we do not use it any more then us using "Mistress" to describe her dominance over me. Both terms have negative meanings to us both. I am as much a man as the next, but with a strong female component inside. I am not weak physically or emotionally. In fact, in my way of thinking, it takes a stronger man to submit to the wants and needs of a woman then it doesto to dominate her.Quote:
Originally Posted by Josie M
Not all submissive crossdressers are sissies anymore then all dominant women are Mistresses or worse, a dominatrix. It's not a game to us. I am not submissive to anyone but the lady I love. In public, you would never know it anymore then you'd know I'm a crossdresser.
For those that like to "play" being a Mistress and sissy, that's fine and enjoy it. It's just so far removed from the way I/we live.
Whenever I see the term Sissy being used to describe a crossdresser it's usually to describe a submissive crossdresser sometimes with his mistress. But I doubt anyone would refer to themselves as that outside of fantasy/role-playing.
I've looked up the definition of "Sissy" a few times, and it usually says something along the lines of what dictionary.com offers:
1. an effeminate boy or man.
2. a timid or cowardly person.
3. a little girl.
So I suppose that technically most of us ARE sissy's, but I REALLY dont like that label. While it clearly is not the actual definition of the word, I think "sissy" means someone who is a coward, who is afraid to do hard work, who is afraid or unwilling to get their hands dirty, and those things do NOT describe me. For that matter, they do not describe most of the women that I know.
Good post Kimberly. I'd only add that in some families, a sister among siblings is sometimes called Sissy as a nickname. Think of Sissy Spacek the actress.
To some it's the same as calling a female a Tomboy for doing things considered male. A male might be called a sissy if he is into cooking, fashion, or even nursing. Of course I would not agree with those as reason to call a male a sissy.
But once again, I do not like the term at all.
From what I've seen, the term sissy in the CD world is derived from the word "sister", and defines a boy that relates to being a sister. For example, a boy that prefers to play with dolls instead of doing boy stuff and tries on sister's clothes. It certainly has different meanings.
I didn't play with dolls, but did try on the clothes. LOL
Thats a good way to state it Fem. The term may kind of fit me, but I prefer to be called a part time cd, or even fetish cd instead.Quote:
Originally Posted by FemPossible
[SIZE="2"]I like thinking of myself as a sissy, and I don’t feel it’s a derogatory term, but everyone else does! I think this is one of the side effects of MtF crossdressing – am I a sissy, a fairy, or...gasp...GAY? You are what you are, or, more specifically, what you wish to be, but it’s all about how others will perceive your expression. This is why I remain secretive, because the idea of being a sissy is cute, worth a giggle, and not worth worrying about. I suppose other males feel threatened in some way when a boy/male/man starts to exhibit anti-masculine characteristics, but they are not aware what pleasures await those who explore their own sexuality and/or potential...Quote:
Originally Posted by brassieres
:battingeyelashes:[/SIZE]
You can refer to me as Princess Consuela Banannahammock.
(I also need better things to do)
Gee ...this is one of those perennial discussions that never has an end. Sissy means so many things to so many people. I am totally OK with being a sissy. A very girly girl or a very girly guy. Hey! That is what I am! I not a sissy maid, or anyone's slave (unless I want to be). And yeah, it can have its derogatory connotations and gay males look down upon their sissy counterparts and pump iron 24 hours to counteract the sissy effect, but that is just plaiin hypocrisy.
I like the word. I reclaim it to its proper place and meaning. The word is a nice word that has been hijacked by all kinds of subcultures and the kids in the playground.
I am a sissy... and guess what? I am proud of it. And if someone calls me a sissy, I say "thank you very much... you are quite observant!"
The think I do not like is a lot of people also associate the word with someone that may be a bimbo or not willing to get their hands dirty. Not this sissy....
Attention: This is what courage and self acceptance looks like.Quote:
Originally Posted by Michelia
I'll bet a hundred dollars this girl has no problem with relationships, intimate or otherwise.