I've had a somewhat uncomfortable realization these past few months that I am in fact a woman, and just set up incorrectly. This truth has been a long time coming but is now crystal clear. What this means on a practical level is TBD.
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I've had a somewhat uncomfortable realization these past few months that I am in fact a woman, and just set up incorrectly. This truth has been a long time coming but is now crystal clear. What this means on a practical level is TBD.
I'm a dude, just like being fem sometimes...it's fun
I'm a male with a whole lot of stereotypical female desires. Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.
Having only recently started doing a lot of soul-searching on this issue, a lot of my life seems to make more sense (today, anyway) if I try to look at it from the perspective of having been born in the wrong body.
Then again, I still feel male most of the time, with a strong desire to express my more feminine side in order to achieve whatever balance is best for me and my life.
Having lived 33 years as male has done a lot to shape how I view myself - whether it's societal conditioning, lack of questioning, or just part of who I am, I don't have a single permanent answer to the question of "Who am I?"
For today, I am a man who wants to dress as an attractive woman. Tomorrow? I dunno.
Somewhere in between.... although as time goes on and I gain more acceptance and comfort of myself, I can see that my brain tends to work more as a woman's than a man's. I cannot say that I ever feel uncomfortable or wrong as a man, yet I am fairly certain that I would feel just fine if I was in fact a woman. But then, thinking back on the 4th, I was being like a mischievous teenage boy, lighting fireworks, with other middle aged men feeling and acting the same. "what does this do? I dunno, lets light it and find out hehehehehe" I was having a blast and totally connected to the man I am physically. I love playing golf hitting from the back tees, and playing aggressive and hitting it past the other guys. I still have chest thumping moments at times. So, even though it does appear that more of my brain seems to work as a woman's, there is still some boy brain function in there too. I guess for me, if asked internally am I a man or a woman, I would just say yes.
I have long fantasised about being fully dressed as a woman. Unfortunately I haven't been able to go that far, even though I have enjoyed my limited forays, starting when I was quite young. Opportunities for my partial dressing are quite rare, but the feeling of femininity is fully savoured and when I'm indulging myself I could easily struggle to maintain my normal male identity and I question how far this might go, in other circumstances. I find this hard to understand and to come to terms with, although I try not to let it bother me too much or spoil my fun!:battingeyelashes:
I identify more as a female than male, and this has been the case since I was seven. There was a time when I yearned for SRS, and to find an understanding man who would love me, but those feelings have subsided as I have grown older.
I have come to the realization that I can be feminine without actually becoming female. I can feel like a woman without having all the female parts. Besides, there aren't that many men who would be sexually-interested in an older transsexual female, and that is perhaps the only reason I wanted SRS in the first place.
I might consider having breast augmentation, and SRS may be an option in the future. But for now, that isn't practical due to my career. If I had to choose over again? I would definitely choose to be female! :)
Julie,
As I get older I didn't think this question would be harder to answer, but it is !
I don't feel I'm a woman trapped in a male body but at the same time I have less and less interest in doing male activities, I'm tired of still having to live with what is expected of me as a man, I want to be able live with all my identity feelings and not just male !
I have to agree with Isha that I'm still trying to work it out but the difference is I'm trying to do it in a DADT situation and when you don't have acceptance and understanding it's mentally very hard if not near impossible !
Good topic and I've thought a LOT about it lately over the past 10 mo. I've always considered myself male...to the max in fact but I've always known there was a woman in there (sorry for the cliche). Long story short though I've come to realize after much reasearch and reflecti g on my entire life I really am (or should be) a woman, so much so I feel like a woman about 90% of the time now even dressed full on in guys clothing (I feel like a girl dressed as a man) most of time but I fake it not too bad 😥
In some ways I feel indifferent to gender. Not feeling an overwhelming allegiance to either male or female. No desire to transition, but at the same time if you told me when I wake up tomorrow I would be s woman I think I would be fine with it. I no longer feel the need to prove how masculine I am.
I am fortunate enough to have a wife who allows me to express whatever I am feeling on the current day. Fully dressed en femme fine. Butch male fine. Lounging around the house in yoga pants but in otherwise male mode, fine.
I am a guy...for sure. Like hanging out as a guy, love my wife, play softball etc...but aways in the back of mind is dressing and someone wanting me as a women...my wife does sometimes but it is acceptance, vurnability, and a turn on.I am a bit of both...but isn't everyone..
As time goes by my gender identitiy is a woman, I am 75% woman but have alot of male interests, I am a car person I have an interest in cars and recently bought a really awesome classic truck, but also at the same time I am interested in guys, over time I am turning more and more interested in guys but have alot of male interests such as cars, video gaming, etc.....................
To be honest i would say 50\50
I thought that my identity was male who was a cross dresser but as it turned out I was female so I went and had bottom and top surgery and feel great.
I wish I could have chosen, as the characters of the anime Simoun could, and though I have a good life as a male I would have chosen female.
Since my teens I've felt as though I would have chosen to be female if I'd been given the option, but I largely accepted the gender I actually got, at least until recently. I think the quotes above pretty much sum up my position at the moment, though my gender identity is still in flux - whether or not I'll end up as a TS is still an open question for me (up until about two days ago I would have said 'probably not', but I'm not so sure now).
I don't mind living life as a guy and doing guy stuff as well as getting ladylike. =) I been at the crossroads where I thought about transitioning but with counseling and soul searching. I realized I get in "pink fog" moments. I get in phases where I can't wait to get to paint myself all pretty, and there's periods of time where I just like to run around in guy clothes and do guy things. =) Transitioning just isn't my path. But I respect those and support those who need to so that they can be whole and complete.
Do I feel like a man or a woman?
Actually, neither and both... I feel like me.
When I'm dressed, I'm me - that doesn't change. I feel feminine and enjoy all that entails, but the clothes don't change who I am. Because I'm bi I still notice a beautiful woman or a cute guy. Although, after admiring the beautiful woman I immediately skip to what's she wearing (lol).
But what does happen when I dress is that I get a chance to view the world from a different perspective. And that can change someone to the core of being "me." It gives your male self a new awareness that might not have come to pass otherwise.
I had always thought that I would have an easy answer to that question. But over the past year my journey has taken me to places I never would have dreamed. An honest and inward perspective have given me an answer to that question; an answer that needs no further clarification.
I am a guy that so wishes I had been born female. I relegated myself to being a male that enjoyed time as a female but over the years I find myself leaning to being more female. I would say I am more 75% Erin and 25% a drab form of my male self.
I am male but the more I dress as a female I feel more feminine. I don't want to transition to a female, but I like to increase my breast size that way I would not have to use breast forms. I know once you increase your breast size you can never go back and I would never want to. As for now I love and enjoy very much crossdressing, I just wish I could do it more often. My SO knows about my dressing but she isn't to happy about it and I don't get to dress up as much as I would like to. I think if I could I would spin more time dress in female clothes than male clothes.
I feel most comfortable right now in a state of what I call advanced androgyny. I like to keep people thinking, guessing, engaged, and being nice. I do that by intriguing them. If they are oafs, then they will stay that way without the benefit of my and my SO's company.
I know Im a male but from a very early age I wanted to be female. It has taken a long time for me to come to terms with what I really desire and feel. It is great that my wife goes shopping with me buying bras panties and what ever I need. I really feel good wearing bras and panties both at home and out. Make up is something else I do try mascara and lipstick and prefer to dress as the female that I feel in me and yes I would have SRS given the chance. I havent purchased any dresses for some time now but have dresses, tops and shoes just need more like all girls the more the better
I am a male but most of the time don't feel like one.
Really hard to explain.
The word "feel" makes your question intriguing Julie. I've never considered myself anything but male, and I've spent the vast majority of time looking like and "feeling" like one of the guys. Although I'm very comfortable wearing what society deems "women's clothing" I don't have any illusions about my gender changing when I put them on. Sure...my physical appearance changes to a certain degree, especially when wearing a wig and makeup. I've allowed my imagination wander now and then while dressed that way, but the reality is I still "feel" like the male me.
Karen
Some extra thoughts in regards to my last comment: As I said before, I tend to be "neutral" when dressed or not dressed. However, I realized that when I'm out in public I now find my perspective and my mind going "female" on me. Without consciously doing so, I start noticing things and reacting as a girl. One of those reactions being as to how I feel when men look at me. I now understand how women feel when men impose themselves on them out of the blue. It's uncomfortable. But, I find myself trying to be nice and empathetic at the same time. As a woman I feel both empowered and vulnerable... a state I don't experience when in drab.
I identify myself as a male with some desires to be a woman. I definitely love women and have no feelings toward being with a man. It's kind of confusing though, because I am also attracted to other crossdressers. Of course, it's the feminine aspect of crossdressers that I'm attracted to.
My birth certificate says male and my body sure looks male, but my mind screams female. I have long ago stopped trying to figure out why and now just try and live my life as well as I can, mixing in female when ever I can.
I am both. I cherish my female side but can enjoy my male side. For me, the combination works.
I wish I knew too...and if it were possible to switch it off I most definitely would. I say this because I fear where I'm at genderwise.
I feel it's more than just crossdressing to me. I feel that in order to be happy in my own body, I'll have to transition. That's what scares me because I've done my fair share of reading on the internet about transitioning. It's an astonishingly large mountain to climb. I'm scared of the friends I'd lose. Scared how my parents would take it. But at some point my happiness will overcome my fears. Until that day, I present as a male but feel my brain is 60+% female. I have more female friends than male. I get along better with females. Yes, I do plenty of male things and don't avoid them but I think had I been born female, I'd likely do those things anyways. Who knows what my future holds...guess I'll find out eventually.
Actually, this is precisely how I feel.
I accept my male identity (though I'm moving away from that end of the binary these days) and am not sufficiently dysphoric about it to feel a need to transition but it would be wonderful if I could magically change sex any time I wanted. I suspect that I'd spend the majority of my time as a woman.
I still look& act as a man, but I feel all woman inside. I am a crossdresser but I feel that I am transgendered and I want to transition soon.
I usually state what I am ad nauseum in any post to give people context, but since it's the topic at hand I can do so without guilt.
I identify as Gender fluid. My gender identity fluctuates over time. Some days I'm female, others I'm male, some days I'm neither, and occasionally I'm both. I've even had days where I'm not on the spectrum.
Most of the time I'm a mix of masculine and feminine. Right now, I'm 80% female and 20% male. There are days where I have some serious dysphoria and hate my baldness and my male body, and then there are days where I'm happy in my male body, proud even.
Right now, I'm content walking around the house in my capris and a bra with forms ( I just woke up. ) in a couple of hours I'll have to dress like a man and go to work. Whether I'll be Adyson or Adam at the time, only time will tell. Regardless of what I feel I am at any given time, I will always be me though.
This is a really good topic. I see myself in the mirror and wish "why cant I be female?". I hate that I was born a man but I am extremely afraid of making the transition. I love every aspect of being able to dress up and look pretty. However my family does not condone nor would they ever understand. They dont even try to understand. The latest comments my family has made has prevented me from ever coming out to them.
So sorry to hear that Lily. As much as I'd like to come out to my dad and my best friend, I know that doing so is a bad idea, so I know what you're going through.
Personally, I'm a man. Feel like a man. I like my penis and I like hanging out with the guys.
BUT, I do like to dress up to feel attractive, to get in touch with my sensitivity and because I was always one of the girls growing up, just being as close as possible to being one of the girls but not giving up being one of the guys.
I would love to know it feels like to be a real girl but perfectly content being who I am. I love dressing and fantasizing and content to leave it that.
Life is what it is. We are born either male or female. Some of us are inclined to change our sex. But what if the grass is not really greener? Is there a sex change-change operation? A women has the potential for an experience that a man will never have, not simply to be insanely sexy, but to give birth to a new life. But a father can see that life come into being and be profoundly affected. I enjoy being a man. i can not help but notice the splendor of the female form. But I also enjoy imitating that form when I have the chance. The fact that I enjoy makeup, heels, perfume, and a dress does not change my inner self.
Do i have a desire to be a normal woman with a vagina, uterus, breasts, etc? No. I'm happy to be like these three drag queens in movie High Heels (1995) starring Patrick Swayze and Wesley Snipes. They call themselves drag queens, but they dress as women even when it is not for entertaining purpose, which make them crossdressers too.
I'm skinny and not as tall as them, so i'm a bit more passable. ;)
Candice
Now that is a beautiful video - no words needed :)
Wonderful, love it :)
Kate
Would I mind if I had a vagina, breasts, hips and such...NO.
Am I totally unhappy who I am NO.
Would I transition if I could a get away with it? Maybe
Do I love dressing YES.
Do I get confused ... yes, that is why I have a therapist.
She is great.