Did crossdressing effect the way you dated growing up?

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Originally Posted by outhiking

I crossdressed all through high school and college. I think it affected my dating since I would act as a gentleman, the way I would have wanted to be treated if I were a woman on a date. I guess it gave me more empathy for the girls I was dating and boy did I envy their clothes and hair (it was the Big Hair 80's).

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If that was the case, then I'm willing to bet that like me, this automatically disqualified you from being "boyfriend" material and consigned you that dreaded "friend" or "like a brother" H*ll from which there was no escape.

And like me, you were likely also the one they came running to in order to complain how shabbily the "bad boy" jocks and bikers that they dated because they were so interesting and "dangerous" (not to mention needed their TLC to help them see the error of their ways) treated them. Duh!

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Originally Posted by Leslie Langford

If that was the case, then I'm willing to bet that like me, this automatically disqualified you from being "boyfriend" material and consigned you that dreaded "friend" or "like a brother" H*ll from which there was no escape.

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... The times I thought I was dating someone, only to find out afterwards that she had never considered it that way. There is one in particular that now, 25-ish years later, I still feel like "the one who got away". My Persian beauty...

when I was dating in high school, I wanted to get in girls panties....period.

I can honestly say that I've only asked a girl out on a date once in my life. I was so painfully shy that the thought of it could almost make me wet myself. But the only times I've been without a girlfriend were when I wanted to be alone and when I was hitting bottom with drugs and alcohol. Girls were always attracted to me, at least a certain kind of girl. I had that tortured bad boy loner thing going on. I was attracted to them except that I had a conflict. They saw me as a guy and I could not get into the idea of myself as a guy sexually speaking. But when I was under the influence, I'd try anything. So I spent a lot of time under the influence. The kind of girls that were attracted to me were of the Borderline Personality Disorder variety - AKA psycho bitches from hell. When we had sex, or tried to, I would steal their underwear for myself. We deserved each other. I finally got so bad that I had to be a tortured bad boy loner all by myself. Even the PBFHs didn't want to have anything to do with me. It wasn't crossdressing per se that affected me in dating. Crossdressing was merely a symptom. It was my inability to see myself in a masculine roll either socially or sexually.

I wasn't a big dater in high school but I did date. My CDing had nothing to do with who or how I dated. They were separate parts of my life and they still are today.

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Originally Posted by ReineD

... IMO, they were making a subconscious choice that the crossdressing was more important to them than any relationship with a GG ...

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I'm afraid I must disagree with you here, Reine. Some choose not to date for various reasons. Not dating was one of the ways I kept myself somewhat safe.

By my junior year in high school i was going to school, going to welding school, going to work, going home to sleep. My days started at 0630 and usually ended at 0300 the following day. I'd get up at 0630, shower, walk to school, go to classes until 1530 then walk to a professional welding school and attend classes there until 2030. I'd then hop a ride to the place where i worked and work until 0200 the following day. At 0630 it would start all over again. Weekends (Friday night and Saturday night) was home work and sleep time for me. Sunday night at 2030 my "day" started again. Who had time for dating?? I went on my first highschool date to the senior prom. In my mind it was a bust.

SarahLynn

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Originally Posted by giuseppina

I'm afraid I must disagree with you here, Reine. Some choose not to date for various reasons. Not dating was one of the ways I kept myself somewhat safe.

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I know that people have different reasons for not dating. I was referring to the members here who have said they would not date a woman unless she knew and accepted the CDing. And others have said that they broke it off with women when the relationship was getting too close, for fear that she would find out about the CDing.