Have you been with a guy?

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Originally Posted by leonal123

Hi,
I am thinking about being with a guy when dressed up fully but only in presence of a girl. I am a straight guy who likes dressing up but I have never ever ever thought about a guy before. Now slowly I am opening up to the idea of being with a guy and letting him drill me while a girl is present.

I really want to do it but I am wondering if I am going to regret it later. My questions are
1. Has anyone done it before?
2. Did you feel guilty later about it?
3. Did you get addicted to being with a guy?
4. Did you decide to go fulltime after being with a guy?
Most Importantly
5. Was it more pleasurable than straight sex? How did you feel?

Before dressing up, I used to see shapes as masculine and feminine. Like certain shoes are obviously feminine (slim).. you know what I am saying.. Now I dont have those thoughts any more since I started dressing up. I am wondering if being with a guy would make one gender fluid. I am thinking about it but I want to know other's physical, emotional experience before taking this step.

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For me it's quite similar for most of previous replies.

1. I hadn't I would not mind with the right set of circumstances. However it will part of a experience, not a longer or a emotional engagement at all.
2. I would not, as I said, it's clear for me that is/could be a experience only.
3. Why should be?
4. Same as 3. Why should be?

We are what we are, I don't think a experience could change our behavior. Except is we talk about a repressed sexual orientation, that could potentially arise from this experience. So the difference will be that we just opened a can that was previously closed and allowing to see the real herself.

Cheers

Yes I have, I am more attracted to women, but when I am transformed, I am very much into being a girl for a man... It wasn't an overnight process to get me to accept myself this way, but I have found it rewarding now that I do.

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Originally Posted by BillieAnneJean

While I sympathize with anyone who is going this route, and this post is in no way judgmental.....

Never going to happen for me ever never ever.

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You "sympathize"?

I find that incredibly insulting. I don't need your sympathy because I'm gay, just as much as you (or I) don't need anyone's sympathy for being cd

I have never been with a man and am a straight married man in real life. However as Lesley, a 51 year old full life secret crosddresser I find I am now curious about men in a sexual way, but only in giving oral sex while fully dressed. Dont ever think about usually, but whenI am Lesley it is a tangible desire. Probably will not act on this desire as I would not know how to mert an interested man.

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Originally Posted by jenni_xx

You "sympathize"?

I find that incredibly insulting. I don't need your sympathy because I'm gay, just as much as you (or I) don't need anyone's sympathy for being cd

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jenni_xx
Please refer to these definitions of sympathize from Merriam Webster online dictionary:
": to feel sorry for someone who is in a bad situation : to feel sympathy for someone because you understand that person's problems"

": to feel or show support for or approval of something"

You will note that there is more than one meaning to the word sympathy. If you take the most insulting meaning to you then I can understand your reasoning. But if you consider the second meaning, that I am "show(ing) support for or approval of....." then perhaps you may find that my post was in fact supportive. Actually if you read any of my posts you will find that I am very supportive of anyone and everyone.

Perhaps you may, given your new knowledge of the meaning for sympathy, choose to reconsider.

I am providing the link in case you wish to do some research on the subject. You may find the site useful any time in the future to understand the meaning(s) in a post.

Additionally my post says:
"While I sympathize with anyone who is going this route, and this post is in no way judgmental....."

What this means is that While I "show support for or approval of " (credits again to Merriam Webster online)" anyone going this route , and this post is in no way judgmental..... "Emphasis added later)

Again perhaps with your new insight you may choose to reread my post.

Billie

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Originally Posted by SandraInHose

Those snips from your post above hit the nail on the head for me. Well stated.

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Anneliese and SandraInHose you can add me to having those same sentiments.

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Originally Posted by DonnaA

I must disagree with some posters here who feel that clothing doesn't change your sexual desires or thoughts. When I am dressed as a man, I think about being with women sexually. But, when I am dressed as a woman, I think about being with men sexually. So, at least in my case, the type of clothing I am wearing does influence my sexual thoughts and desires. Maybe I am in the minority here?

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Minority maybe but not alone since that describes me too.

The thing with this kind of issue is, people tend to assign their own beliefs, preferences and experiences to everyone. In reality, some of us are attracted to men only when in drab, some only when in drag, some always, some never, and some only when wearing a gorilla costume (hey, don't judge!)

logic here. If it was only the clothes that made you want to be with a guy, as soon as you were naked wouldn't that go away?

No, residual effect...

DeeAnn

No, but I've been intimate with a girlfriend while dressed. One afternoon we had a quiet moment that meant 'what do you want to do?' I asked her (couldn't believe the words came out of my mouth) "Do you have anything pretty I could wear?" She didn't miss a beat! She jumped to her dresser and pulled out a loose pair of tap pants and a matching top in green satin. "Here, put this on." She brushed my hair and added some barrettes and put some clip-on earrings on me and did some light makeup. I was very excited. She pulled her hair back so it looked short and put on a boy t-shirt and a pair of jeans. The rest, I'll leave to our collective imagination.
The power of our mutual response frightened both of us, I think, and though our relationship continued, we never repeated or discussed that scenario or crossdressing, for that matter. The relationship ended much later for other reasons.

I have an off-and-on intimate relationship with a guy. He's special, haven't pursued a relationship with anyone else.

1. Has anyone done it before? yes
2. Did you feel guilty later about it? did at first
3. Did you get addicted to being with a guy? kinda
4. Did you decide to go fulltime after being with a guy? no, but i dressed a lot more
Most Importantly
5. Was it more pleasurable than straight sex? How did you feel? for me i find it more pleasureable than straight sex, but just like any kind of sex i have there are factors that make it more enjoyable, how attracted i am to them, the connection we have, how pretty i am feeling that day, and most of all i like taking it from behind and performing oral. I would suggest to atleast experiment with yourself first

One's sexuality is not the same as identity, but they are linked. On top of that, sexuality (that is, sexual interest) moves all around over the course of your life anyway.

Why over analyze? What is so bad about being curious, or even *gasp* gay?

I mean, you are still just a person who needs love and care. You still want mostly the same things from a person.

I guess I just fail to see what all the hubub is about. If I like a person I like *them*, I don't like them just for their bits. I will enjoy whatever they happen to have.

<3

- MM

1. Has anyone done it before? Yes orally many times twice anally. I bottom
2. Did you feel guilty later about it? At first then it was like..."who the **** cares'
3. Did you get addicted to being with a guy? Go through spurts
4. Did you decide to go fulltime after being with a guy? No Been with guys way before I dressed
Most Importantly
5. Was it more pleasurable than straight sex? How did you feel? Different. I like the submissive role cause I have to be Alpha all the other times.

I am Bi love making love to a woman and guys. I am 50:50 on the scale. When I dress I don't feel the urge though, which may be odd. I have not been with a guy dressed but when I do he will have to be better than the guys I've been with as a guy. Jus tfeel so lady like when dressed and raise the bar.

I've never been with a guy but love the thought of it when dressed...

I don't think I could actually see myself dating a guy but having one night of fun could be nice!! :)

This thread and ones like it are much of the reason I don't introduce my wife to this crossdressing forum. For most of us, the first question we get asked when we tell someone we enjoy wearing women's clothes is; "Are you gay?" For me, and I suspect for most crossdressers, the answer is "No, I am straight." That's what my wife asked me and that was my answer.

A person reading this forum might get other ideas if they came across threads like this one. I don't want my wife to think dressing will make me gay. It would not help my marriage. I don't think it would help anyone's marriage.

I'm not trying to say there is anything wrong with being gay, but you really should admit it to yourself if you are, not try to blame it on crossdressing.

Krisi, it's more complicated than that. Someone who is "straight" may have fantasies, or be willing to try having sex with a male, but none of that would make you gay, just bi or bi curious. I'm sure your wife would be able to see that, or you could explain it to her.

I suppose if many on here was honest and when dressed said that they would like to be with a man....

I think that going out with a man to a show, cinema or a meal would appeal to many girls.

I would love to go out for a meal etc with one...but anything sexual...NO WAY.

Julie.

Well, I'm no closer to an answer after reading this entire thread. The only time I think of kissing a guy is when I see a beautiful girl kissing one and I want to be her (i want to be her no matter what she's doing). I never feel that way looking at two guys kissing. It's actually a turn-off. And the thought of a relationship with a guy with me as a man is also a turn-off. Looking into his eyes, no, ewww. But if I was a woman, yes, I could do that. I just can't separate in my head the female part of it. The male me is straight, the female me is bi (likes both).

To tell you all the truth, the older you get, it comes down to who you get lucky with!!

1. Has anyone done it before?
Yes, I have. I had over some 2-3 years gradually worked myself up to it.Imagining it, wanting to be in the role etc. I had practiced a lot with a prosthetic phallus and I had gotten to knwo a guy over almost two years via a website. Then one day it just boiled over in me. I wanted to, so I said to myself, do it, find it out. I contacted him, he was immedeatly interested, we met the same evening near a highway restaurant. He was really nice, but I felt that all his compliments and tenderness were towards another perseon - maybe not me - I just wanted none of the flirting, I wanted to get to it: Seduce him, perform orally etc.
That is what we did. I seduced him as best i could with my behind on his front, then kneeling, opening it up and putting the raincoat on as I had imagined it to do. That part went well and as planned. He was very enthusiastic about my performance I felt not a little flattered.
Then the first disillusion: I couln't do in reality what I had done to my prothetic piece at home. My throat wouldn't allow it. i tried and re-tried. No go. So I couldn't do what I imagined. What then? I tried to do what I could but after 5 minutes os so I felt sore and thouroughly unenthusiastic about it. It was like work. I kept up the smiles and the banter, but it was really work.
Felt even stronger that i was pretending to be something rather than being something.
This led me to renounce this route. That said the fantasy is still with me and still gets me excited. But I know it didn't do anything for me there and then. Sometimes I think I should try again with a different mind set but then again i feel that it in't what I am however exciting the fantasy may be.

2. Did you feel guilty later about it? - Yes.Not morally but towards him for pretending, towards his girlfriend (I learned there and then that he had one who didn't like oral). I felt really guilty about making him cheat. Especially because it was just an experiment for me.

3. Did you get addicted to being with a guy? -not at all. The fantasy is still there and maybe that counts, but definitely no.

4. Did you decide to go fulltime after being with a guy? not at all

Most Importantly
5. Was it more pleasurable than straight sex? How did you feel? - I have had good and bad straight sex, but this wasn't the right thing for me. So it wasn't.

Cheers

Lilli, your answer to #1 is pretty much my experience in the one time I did it. I have the fantasy, maybe that's all it'll ever be for you and me.

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Originally Posted by AmandaM

I never feel that way looking at two guys kissing. It's actually a turn-off. And the thought of a relationship with a guy with me as a man is also a turn-off. Looking into his eyes, no, ewww. But if I was a woman, yes, I could do that. I just can't separate in my head the female part of it. The male me is straight, the female me is bi (likes both).

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Maybe that is where I am different from most. I don't compartmentalize myself based on what 'mode' I'm in. I'd feel the same things in work boots and flannel as I would in a flowery skirt.

It is a role in a 'pair', and you have ideas as to what each is -supposed- to do, and you have a hard time traversing that wall.

This is a good discussion.

- MM

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Originally Posted by MarciManseau

Krisi, it's more complicated than that. Someone who is "straight" may have fantasies, or be willing to try having sex with a male, but none of that would make you gay, just bi or bi curious. I'm sure your wife would be able to see that, or you could explain it to her.

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No, I could not explain to my wife that I wanted to have sex with a man. Or why some other supposedly straight male would want to have sex with a man simply because he strapped on a pair of boobs and a wig. He would still be a male having sex with another male. The strap on boobs and wig don't change anything. And if he was married or in a committed relationship, that would be cheating just the same as if he had sex with a woman.

It almost seems like you are saying that being bisexual is somehow less deviant than being gay. Like you are trying to defend it.

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Originally Posted by Lilli

... and putting the raincoat on as I had imagined it to do.

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That's so European!!! :)

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Originally Posted by Krisi

It almost seems like you are saying that being bisexual is somehow less deviant than being gay. Like you are trying to defend it.

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No less deviant, just more fun :)

From my experience, I wouldn't say "more fun". I would say equally as enjoyable.

DeeAnn

I would say not deviant at all. Just normal for a lot of us.

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Originally Posted by Lilli

Then the first disillusion: I couldn't do in reality what I had done to my prothetic piece at home. My throat wouldn't allow it. i tried and re-tried. No go. So I couldn't do what I imagined. What then? I tried to do what I could but after 5 minutes or so I felt sore and thoroughly unenthusiastic about it. It was like work. I kept up the smiles and the banter, but it was really work.
Felt even stronger that i was pretending to be something rather than being something.
Cheers

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I'm reminded of an old blues song by the late Joe Williams:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qeM8kKynjc

"If you're feelin' good, it's because you're supposed to/And if you're not feelin' good, you ain't doin' it right!"

You may be right that it wasn't for you and best remains a fantasy, but there's always "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again":heehee:

with how strict they are about shutting down threads it is kinda weird this one survives?

not only would it freak out wives / GFs etc just trying to learn about this whole thing...

but what does Being With A Guy specifically have to do with Crossdressing?

it's more of a side-note to what it's really about...

I've seen threads closed for far far less!

I'm a gay male and have been with lots of guys. Most gay men are not attracted to crossdressers, but fortunately some are. I find that there is a little shame/guilt when I connect with a guy as a guy, but just pure joy when I connect with a guy as a tgirl. Perhaps I should have been a heterosexual female.

Mink...first the OP asked about dressing and being with a guy.

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Originally Posted by FeliciaCDSNJ

I've been with a guy before. It was interesting to say the least and without turning this post into a xxx story. Would I do it again? Yes, I've come to terms with myself that not only am I trans but also bisexual. I don't act on my urges because I'm with a wonderful woman, who I would not trade anything in the world for. It was different as I'm use to holding someone and to get held was different in a good way.

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Your last line You nailed it in my case--Being held (in that way) by someone who just happened to be the same sex was intense. It brought out ALL the same sensations I get when dressed. Can I replicate that as I searched? Nope Just as I can't replicate the call me Bi? I don't care. I dig & found the key to me is a deep connection Now if I was 18 and with all the BS Propaganda on the web I'd probably do things because of the heinous BS these young kids see repeptively: your a worthless man be a pretty girl you an do it while your young & objectify yourself & you will be happy-Awful advice- As time goes on that leads to alphabet diseases & as you age that once young shine goes away I swear some of these sites that promote that are borderline pedophiles and predators...JMHO

We are who we are,

It isn't about genes. It is about want.

I'm all over a pretty, sweaty man. It isn't about sex. It is more about appreciation of our differences.

We all see and probably stoke those differences.

- MM

[SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

You either like 'gurls' or you don't.

I like a pretty boi in a skirt. It isn't the same thing as a female in the same gear.

It is a 'role' thing. Most men are far too butched up to even see it.

- MM

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Originally Posted by Mink

but what does Being With A Guy specifically have to do with Crossdressing?

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M:

In my opinion, it is very definitely related as dressing seems to be an enabler for some. I think this is illustrated by the phrase "I feel like this when I'm dressed, but not when I am not dressed.". How often that occurs is difficult to say, but in the subset of the crossdressing population represented here, it comes up with some frequency.

Anyway, that's my guess. Note that it does not apply to self-identified bisexuals. In my case, being intimate with men predated the first time that I dressed by about 5 years. Therefore, I wouldn't consider it an enabler for me.

DeeAnn

For me, sex has to be preceded by some sort of romance. Kissing, hugging, fondling of body parts, etc. Not for long, perhaps but at least several minutes. I can't see me kissing and hugging another man, much less giving him oral or anal sex and strapping on a pair of boobs and a wig doesn't change that.

And as for anal, once you pull down your panties, the stuff that flops out is certainly going to ruin the illusion of being a female.

For anyone who identifies as gay, that's fine for me, I have no problem with a person's sexual preference. The problem I have is with people thinking that strapping on a pair of boobs and a wig can change their sexual preference. If you think it does, you are fooling yourself.

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Originally Posted by Krisi

The problem I have is with people thinking that strapping on a pair of boobs and a wig can change their sexual preference. If you think it does, you are fooling yourself.

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And that's the heart of it. I don't think it CHANGES anything. I think it UNCOVERS. My opinion, anyway. Consider it this way: what if crossdressing turned out to be a roundabout way of discovering one's true sexuality? I'm not talking about everyone, just some.

DeeAnn

I love how these threads come around periodically and stir up so many adamant declarations of defensiveness lol
I consider myself pansexual but I also believe labels are silly and that sexual orientation is no more a binary than is gender. I think if people were not so conditioned by society to knee jerk responses about sexuality a lot more would be willing to acknowledge feelings they seem embarrassed to admit. I think guilt is silly and a waste of time. I wish more people would just relax and enjoy love where ever it can be found....it is so frequently not there when we need it.
Most of my life I have been pansexual in theory but strictly heterosexual in practice because my partner was female, I was under the self deluding illusionc I was male, and I loved only her. Now, marriage ending, and five years into HRT, things have changed. Though still theoretically pansexual, I'm now interested pretty much exclusively in men. Regardless of theory, I've moved from hetero male to hetero female.
And it's not just about sex, far from it. Truthfully the sex is a small part and far from the most important part.
It's not something I can easily explain... it just is and it feels so right I can't believe it took me so long to get here. It's a very happy place for me.

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Originally Posted by samantha rogers

And it's not just about sex, far from it. Truthfully the sex is a small part and far from the most important part.

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True. The concept of sexuality goes 'way beyond who you happen to be sleeping with and what you do...

DeeAnn

1. Has anyone done it before?

Yes, finally after many years of fantasy!

2. Did you feel guilty later about it?

I thought i might but i didnt =)

3. Did you get addicted to being with a guy?

It was an great experience and i will "get laid" again *lol*

4. Did you decide to go fulltime after being with a guy?

No im comfortable bringing out the naughty woman in me att special accasions.


Most Importantly
5. Was it more pleasurable than straight sex? How did you feel?

I hooked up with a older man (18years older) that i meet on a dating site. I came home to me. I was so nervous and horny that i shaked when i opened the door *lol*
Im passive/sub. And when he started touching me like a woman it felt AMAZING. Everything felt great The feeling of have been used as a woman after he left my house was also great.

i have never had the interest, penises are kind of gross i think. but i guess different strokes for different folk and all that.

1. Has anyone done it before?
-Yes. The one and only time.
2. Did you feel guilty later about it?
-Not at all.
3. Did you get addicted to being with a guy?
-No, but had those rollercoaster like mixed feelings between "never again" and "Another ride please!"
4. Did you decide to go fulltime after being with a guy?
-I don't think that decision could be defined by one or more sexual experiences, it depends on a lot more.

Most Importantly
5. Was it more pleasurable than straight sex? How did you feel?
It was... different. Strange, in many ways. Definitely pleasurable, but neither lesser or greater than straight sex. . The smells, the touch (surprisingly soft!) It felt weird at first but after I got into the role and became Nadine it became awesome!
Would I do it again? definitely. But I'm currently on a steady relationship and I'm not the cheating kind, so it'll have to wait...

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Originally Posted by StinaTv

. The feeling of have been used as a woman after he left my house was also great.

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Sorry but how could have felt this you don't even have the plumbing of a woman.

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Originally Posted by Krisi

For anyone who identifies as gay, that's fine for me, I have no problem with a person's sexual preference.

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Originally Posted by Krisi

It almost seems like you are saying that being bisexual is somehow less deviant than being gay. Like you are trying to defend it.

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I'm going to call you out on your use of language here, Krisi. When you say that you 'have no problem with' it but at the same time state that being bi or gay is 'deviant' (while also implying that it's indefensible), it sounds as though you have at least some issues with non-heterosexual orientations. To say that sex with guys isn't your thing and you have no interest in it whatsoever is fine, but speaking in moralistic terms about others isn't helpful. What I'm hearing is "really, it's okay if you want to be a disgusting faggot", which resembles the sort of superficially-positive-but-implicitly-judgemental "love the sinner, hate the sin" stuff; it's a mixed message at best and a cloaked condemnation at worst. If I'm putting words in your mouth, though, please correct me.

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Originally Posted by Krisi

This thread and ones like it are much of the reason I don't introduce my wife to this crossdressing forum.

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As to whether or not your wife would be confused about CDs by seeing this thread, wouldn't that present an opportunity for education? Pretty much every possible response to the OP is included here, and it just goes to show that the stereotypes of CDs are in no way accurate descriptors of every member of this group (or even a majority). In fact, I've gone through the thread, analyzed the responses to the best of my ability (which, admittedly, included some judgement calls) and attempted to relate them to the classic Kinsey scale of sexual orientation. I've come up with the following (based on 144 interpretable responses):

• [0] Exclusively heterosexual (22%)
• [1] Predominantly heterosexual (35%) *
• [2] Predominantly hetero but more than incidentally homosexual (12%) **
• [3] Bisexual (20%)
• [4-6] More than incidentally homosexual (11%)

More than two-thirds of the sample are entirely or predominantly heterosexual, and only 1 in 9 are more gay than straight. Many of the members, regardless of their orientation, also explicitly condemn cheating on spouses, which I think is a pretty positive statement.

I excluded comments from GGs and, for simplicity, considered all remaining respondents as male (since we're supposedly talking about CDs rather than TSs). If people self-identified as a particular orientation I took them at their word even if I might personally have classified them otherwise based on their actual statements. Usually this was people identifying as bi when I felt they were less so, which I think accounts for the relatively high incidence of bisexuals [3] relative to lower ratings [1-2]. Based on the nature of this group, and because this is a voluntary survey, there's also certain to be some sort of response bias relative to the general population.

* might consider it under certain circumstances, thinking about it but haven't done it, tried it with another CD, tried it but wasn't impressed
** bisexual but prefer hetero aka tried it and liked it but like women more

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Originally Posted by Sandra

Sorry but how could have felt this you don't even have the plumbing of a woman.

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To me the important word here is AS implying similarity. I wouldn't think that the intent was an exact comparison, but it would be interesting to hear what ST meant. And actually, how could one make an accurate comparison without a set of experiences from the perspective of a genetic female? I would assume that set of experiences would be all encompassing and not just limited to genitalia.

DeeAnn

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Originally Posted by Sandra

Sorry but how could have felt this you don't even have the plumbing of a woman.

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It's amazing where fantasy can take a person, Sandra. I think it has to do with the whole role playing thing ... which renders having a vagina almost unnecessary.

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Originally Posted by Mayo

• [0] Exclusively heterosexual (22%)
• [1] Predominantly heterosexual (35%) *
• [2] Predominantly hetero but more than incidentally homosexual (12%) **
• [3] Bisexual (20%)
• [4-6] More than incidentally homosexual (11%)

More than two-thirds of the sample are entirely or predominantly heterosexual, and only 1 in 9 are more gay than straight. Many of the members, regardless of their orientation, also explicitly condemn cheating on spouses, which I think is a pretty positive statement.

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How did you classify sentiments like "Yes, I've had those feelings too" if they didn't say they tried it, or didn't disclose they tried it and it burst their bubble. I know people who fantasize about it but who were turned off by the actual experience of being with a man. So there's a category you didn't list, which is those people who are more turned on by the idea of being a sexual woman than having any real attraction to men (or perhaps even women). I think that being predominately autosexual is a different category than heterosexual, bisexual, or homosexual, although few people would be willing to classify themselves that way.

I never had any type of experience with a guy - many many years ago my wife and switched roles one evening -
that was a fun and very hot time - We were both dressed as the opposite gender

The concept at times seems like an intriguing fantasy, of which I am always dressed as AND treated like a lady

Am I bi-curious? Maybe since the thought crosses my mind - don't know what the rule book says on that

Not sure if I would ever follow thru if the opportunity ever came up (I'd probly kick off my heels and run:eek:)
Sort of like when I'm in drab and flirting with a woman. If I sense she may have interest in me - I stop a.s.a.p
(I joke with friends that I'm a catch and release type of guy) Perhaps "The hunt is more thrilling then the kill"

Sometimes fantasies are best left as fantasies

Those are ALL my non-committal - all over the road opinions :heehee:

Sometimes people try to overanalyze things - just go with the flow and enjoy life as it comes

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Originally Posted by Mayo

• [1] Predominantly heterosexual (35%) *

If people self-identified as a particular orientation I took them at their word even if I might personally have classified them otherwise based on their actual statements. Usually this was people identifying as bi when I felt they were less so, which I think accounts for the relatively high incidence of bisexuals [3] relative to lower ratings [1-2].

* might consider it under certain circumstances, thinking about it but haven't done it, tried it with another CD, tried it but wasn't impressed

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Originally Posted by ReineD

How did you classify sentiments like "Yes, I've had those feelings too" if they didn't say they tried it, or didn't disclose they tried it and it burst their bubble. I know people who fantasize about it but who were turned off by the actual experience of being with a man. So there's a category you didn't list, which is those people who are more turned on by the idea of being a sexual woman than having any real attraction to men (or perhaps even women).

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Those responses I generally coded as a 1. If someone had never tried it but explicitly identified as bisexual, I coded them a 3 even though I personally felt they'd be more appropriately listed as a 1 or perhaps a 2. I don't claim it's a rigorous analysis but I did the best I could with the information I had available to me. :)

EDIT: I'd probably code SHY KIM's post as a 1, for example, because of 'intriguing fantasy' and 'the thought crosses my mind', though I suspect it's more properly a 0 ('kick off my heels and run'). This is one of the tougher calls, though.

Fair enough! :)

Although it would be nice to be able to factor in the fantasy element, which I think is an important one here and is a category in itself separate from any attraction to men and/or women. There are people who source their greatest sexual gratification on their own in this community.

Shy Kim again
To muddy the water more (and you can quote me) I hope I wouldn't run if the opportunity came up:battingeyelashes:

BUT more importantly. I think Reine had a great point when she mentioned THE FANTASY ELEMENT
Anything created in the mind in many cases, for many people, is as real as if it actually happened physically

As my wife and I both agree, the greatest sexual organ in either sex is the brain. Over 30 years together we have had hundreds of amazing sexual evenings together by sharing our fantasies.
Doing so in some cases actually led us to follow thru on a few of them. When we did so we never had a regret.
Maybe the "fantasy play" allowed us to be more prepared for the real thing?
I'll leave that for others to weigh in on
Kim