ONE per cent...?

1 % is a number often tossed about here. Or less than 1%. Most here [probably] know what I am talking about. Regardless of what the actual # is...

IF it is 1 % or less, that would mean that very few men would be aware of this CDing thing. Or be out in the RW looking to "bust" other CDers. Does that translate to ONLY men who are CDers are out there actually trying to spot CDers?

And what about women? Unless they know someone who fits "under the umbrella" or have dated one... They are NOT "looking to bust" CDers either.

In countless threads, every time they come up, the vast majority say they would not approach another CDer out in the wild. And not coincidentally, the vast majority say they would not want to be approached.

So is the FEAR [of Society] mostly in one's head?

An analogy might be...

Pulling out/almost pulling out in front of a motorcyclist or someone zooming along on a bicycle. [from a stop sign] Ever done it or come close because you were looking for cars? Unless one rides a motorcycle or a bicycle on a regular basis, this is not hard to do. Either one can easily be hidden behind the A pillar in a cursory glance left or right. You are far more likely to spot either one IF you are actually looking for them.

This is not a call for folks to flee their closets in droves and/or throw caution to the wind.

But if you DO have itchy feet to get out there...

Participation or response not mandatory of course.

Sorry WOH I thought the % was about 10% approximation known and possibly higher still hidden ! I will stand corrected if my information is wrong !!
I don't think the general public are looking for TGs/TSs/CDers, it's one of those things that happens somewhere else and to other people !
I've had some interesting interactions with people when accidentally outed dressed but no makeup or wig, no big deal and no animosity !

Percentages is always a matter of where the location is. A gay night club with a transvestite show might yield a higher % of Cders, as to all the males males inside the building. A food court in a suburban mall would have a much smaller % to it in relation to total males in that given area. Major cities with a more diverse population should have a greater frequency of LGBT presence, than Mayberry RFD or smaller populated areas. Heterosexuals have been known to make laws,harass,humiliate, and even kill those who deviate from their norm. Be aware.

I always thought that the so called capacity for CDers to be "busted" by the general public is kind of over rated. Who of the general public actually goes out looking for a CDer on a regular basis? I think most folks have better things to do. :)

I agree. The fear is mainly inside of us. I went out in the daytime a couple of weeks ago. Nobody noticed. Nobody cared. I was going to have my girlfriend get the mail when we returned home, but I did.

I think that if you can pass from 5-10 feet away your're good. I am very critical of how I look and present and have to tell myself that people are not going to be face to face with me, scrutinizing the way I look. When I look in the mirror, I use a 15x magnification and look at every flaw. I look at pictures and zoom in. The reality is that not every woman is beautiful, feminine or pretty. To be honest there are a lot of women who are aesthetically challenged and most of us would probably fit right in. Getting fully dressed and going out in public is the ultimate goal of some of us. Many of us do not have the courage. Many of us under dress or dress in the privacy of a room.


However I do believe that the figure could be as high as 25%, but probably somewhere in between 10-25% world wide. I've thought this for many years, but still people think it's still 1%. Consider all the different ways that men dress. There are men who dress completely and some go out in public. There are some who dress partially and do not. There are men who under dress and never do anything more. Then there are people who are transgender and who eventually transition. Then there are transsexuals, people who got started by dressing. There are she males, lady boys , female impersonators and those who dress for fetish reasons. I may have missed some categories, but you can see it adds up.

Then if you consider that people who are transitioning, have transitioned, those who go out in public, join forums, and those who are out to their SOs or someone else in their lives, we are just the tip of the iceberg. I think that for everyone of us, there are many, many more at various stages of gender expression.

Think about some of these things. In Phoenix where I live, there is at least one major hospital that has a department that does gender reassignment surgery. Granted, the staff and doctors may do other things to fill their schedules, but even if half of the cities the size of Phoenix have such facilities, the demand must be pretty good. I heard that Cuba's public health care system pays for gender reassignment surgery. Look at how many people have been in the news who are transgendered. If this is the very tip of the iceberg, what lies beneath?

Think of all the people who join groups and forums online. All the places online that cater and sell to men and women who wish to express a different gender identity. Look at how women dress in the real world compared to what is for sale. Someone is buying dresses, skirts, slips and hose. I've said this before, I've not seen many women in Phoenix wearing dresses, let alone dresses with hose and a slip. Granted that might be because of lifestyle or climate, but still

I could be wrong about the 10-25%, but I don't think so. Nobody can say for sure, because it's a secret, right?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kate Simmons

O always thought that the so called capacity for CDers to be "busted" by the general public is kind of over rated. Who of the general public actually goes out looking for a CDer on a regular basis? I think most folks have better things to do. :)

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So very true. If someone notices you, that's one thing. They still have to find out if you're a man or a woman. In a society where most people won't even say hello to you, what are the chances of someone coming up to you and asking if you're really a woman?. I think the mere fact that someone who did that would be highly embarrassed if it was indeed a GG would be a big deterrent.

Whatever the percent of CDers is, the rest of society has certainly heard of the concept.

Nobody goes about their day looking to "bust" a CDer, but if they see one, they're likely to notice and point the person out to their friends, just as they might point out someone wearing a Halloween costume when it's not Halloween.

That's not a reason for staying home, but it may be a reason for going out to friendly spaces (high-end malls, museums, restaurants, cafes) -- places that are welcoming to middle-aged women out by themselves, for instance.

Extrapolations are an extremely simple matter.

To anyone with BOTH an OPEN mind and access to the Internet or any public library.

But regardless of what that number actually is, the crux of the CDing matter is it's extremely likely that the only people that are going to be looking for CDers are other CDers.

It has taken < 1% of my time to analyse this thread of yours and it will probably occupy >1% of the rest of the day thinking about it.

Trouble is some people do READ! :)

Edit...
I have just been lambasted.....
I don't agree that only CD'ers are looking for CD'ers, that would be >47.5% of CD'ers doing that.

In the analogy department of post one, I was walking across a University Campus once and my friend said 9 o'clock.
I turned my head and walked straight into a pillar.
We all have blind spots in our eyes so we don't always see things coming anyway.

There is danger in criticizing the OP's post. :)

I also agree the fear of society is deeply ingrained in all of us from an early age.

I agree with you, WAH, that the only people likely to actively look for CDs are other CDs, spouses, etc. I think its because thats whats on their mind and theyre attuned to it. Its similar to the way when an ex boyfriend of mine broke his leg, suddenly it seemed like alot of people had similar injuries. Its just that I noticed it more. When I was pregnant with my kids, suddenly it seemed like there were alot more pregnant people around than usual. Again, I was just noticing it more because it was on my mind.

I also agree with Jess M because I have seen it happen many times. A CD will walk past a group of guys, and a second or two later, one of them will say to his buddies, hey, that was a guy! Then they might snicker. I always think they would behave differently if they didnt have the peer pressure of their little pack though.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wildaboutheels

it's extremely likely that the only people that are going to be looking for CDers are other CDers.

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But other people will see CDers, even if they're not looking for them. Do you disagree with that point?

Girls, I'm sorry but you lost me with this thread LoL.

I've never looked into any statistics regarding how many cross dressers might be out there.

People see! No they aren't out looking for us. Most don't care too much when they do notice us. And yes, for most of us the fear far outweighs the reality. As you are fond of pointing out, those of us who want to go out but are afraid are our own worst enemies. This is usually true.

However, While some motorcyclists/bicyclists get hit every day because "I never saw him". Many more live because they were seen. Absolutely it's safe to go out in many parts of the world. As long as you employ the same safety precautions you would suggest to your wife and daughter. But to pretend nobody is going to notice... Some of the girls I know, if you encountered them on the streets you wouldn't know they were TG. Those are the ones that will never be noticed. The rest of us who aren't that fortunate will be noticed. The reason people can go out regularly isn't because they don't get noticed. They just go anyway.

Hug
Rita

I'm a CDer and I've been out, but I never look for other CDers whatever mode I'm in.

There's no way of knowing the percentage of CDers to the total male population. Some will never admit it, for various reasons. I think there are probably a lot of men who WANT to crossdress but can't bring themselves to do it, again for various reasons. And, we can't even agree here how crossdresser is defined. Besides the obvious, there are transsexuals, entertainers (drag queens & impersonators), transvestic fetishists who might wear only one item for sexual pleasure, etc....

Does it matter if one person notices a CDer out in public, or 100 people notice?

NO. Not in the least.

What matters is whether anyone is going to try to do you physical harm simply because of the way one is dressed.

Walk around a busy mall in the daytime and it's highly UNlikely one will be attacked or noticed. Or followed to your car and attacked. Going out at night and/or where alcohol is being served [not to mention wearing "clubwear" of some type] and of course "risk" goes up.

CDers need to use "good judgement" just like everyone else.

People incur "risk" every time they drive their cars.

I have heard 10% to 20% will crossdress at some point in their life but I imagine that number may be high for those who do it more than a time or two. I have never really looked for other crossdressers when I have been out as Susan or as my male self as it is not something that is important, that being said I have seen them while I have been out and on a couple occasion I was not sure and I did not go up to any of them.
This is just my thoughts now. I believe most people are busy with their lives and as such they don’t really notice others unless something pops out at them so although I know I don’t pass I think a lot of people just don’t notice me as I do my best to look like other woman when I go out. No evening dresses and spiked heels when I go shopping. Also if you act like a respectful lady most people will respond to you that way and most important is self-confidence, if you act like the way you are dressed is perfectly normal and you are not doing anything wrong people will pick up on this and accept it but if you act like you are doing something wrong they will also pick up on that and may challenge you.
For safety sake there are 2 questions you should ask yourself before you go out. First is the place you are going someplace a single lady would go by herself? If you answer that yes then ask yourself if this is a place you would feel comfortable if your wife/girlfriend or your daughter went to. If yes to that then it is a pretty safe place to go. But no matter where you go always pay attention to your surroundings.

I think it is much higher than 1%, hell the numbers on this forum alone are in the thousands. I believe there are an awful lot of us out there. It's easy to be inside thinking there is this big bad world out there waiting to get you if you venture forth. There is plenty risk in going out. However if you keep sitting in a closet and you want to know how it is you are not gonna find out by continuing to sit.
I have probably been out about 12-15 times over the years with minimal negative consequence. It only takes one bad time though and every time I'm out it seems I am waiting for that shoe to drop, but it has not yet. Sooner or later you will run into something scary, but I had to find out. I could not go to my grave or allow myself to get too old without knowing what it's like outside. That was my desire. I'm not compelled to go out anymore, but if the right situation presents itself I'll do it.

Once I found myself in the middle of the shoe section in a mall on Saturday afternoon and there was nary a second look, I realized it's not this big bad wolf waiting to devour me like I did when I was still deeply closeted. And you know what, it took the edge off and actually decreased my desire to go out or do it at all for that matter. And for me I think I needed that.

I read a study a while back that said the brain generally accepts what the eye sees.
I'm not sure what you mean by busted. Nobody is going to run up and accuse you of being a crossdresser. I suspect that many people recognize a crossdresser, and just say nothing. Nobody is going to approach you and say "This is Fred from accounting in a dress". They don't know if you are really a man, or someone in the process of transitioning, or just an unattractive fem.

"How many CD's fit on the head of a pin?" Unless I'm one of them? I don't really care!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wildaboutheels

Does it matter if one person notices a CDer out in public, or 100 people notice?

NO. Not in the least.------------------------------

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Maybe it doesn't to u but it sure as heck does to me! Maybe they'll just think I'm odd, different, a little weird. And, not a gay, pervert. But, whatever it is, it isn't good. I don't give a crap if they tolerate me. I don't need the extra stress and worry. If u need to go out to Dennys and Macys dressed, do it! It's your rite to do so. But, I don't enjoy vanilla venues dressed and never will.

The only reason I ever go to them is because of other dressers. Dressers look for other dressers because we can see we have some things in common. And, if your dressed they probably won't bite your head off! If you're dressed around other strangers? They mite.

Hi Melanie,
I agree with you. I have gotten what, I perceived look or two but when you dress for yourself and your own satisfaction, it is a nonissue as long as some judgmental individual keeps his opinion to themselves.

If a CDer walks in the woods and no one is there to see her, Is she really there?

People would notice if we wore a 1% patch.... Just it would probably be the wrong people!!!

No one knows how many guys CD because when your surveyed, We Lie! If I got a survey in the mail I wouldn't admit anything.

I was thinking that the percentage of people looking to "bust" trans guys (F T M) is probably even way lower or perhaps non-existent.:)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by MelanieAnne

Nobody is going to run up and accuse you of being a crossdresser.

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Little children. They will. Loud, too. "Mommy, look at that man! He's wearing a dress! Why is he wearing a dress?" Then said kid runs over to you. "Hey mister why are you wearing a dress?" Where upon said mommy comes to retreive kiddy and, feeling embarrased, apologises to you, but then of course the whole store is already staring at YOU.

Now, said incident did not happen to me because i was wearing a dress. I was wearing a particular work uniform that you simply don't see every day, but I was in a place where you normally don't see us. So the kid made a scene, perhaps, because he had not seen one of us in person before. But the fact is that kids will do that. he wasn't doing it to be mean, he was just mentioning it to mommy because it was something he hadn't seen before.
And no, I'm not going to tell you what I was wearing. Sorry to the curious.

Ummm, well OK. And teenagers too.

We are such a rare breed that nobody gives us a second thought.
Besides, most people are to busy to notice or care about us one way or the other.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wildaboutheels

Extrapolations are an extremely simple matter.

To anyone with BOTH an OPEN mind and access to the Internet or any public library.

But regardless of what that number actually is, the crux of the CDing matter is it's extremely likely that the only people that are going to be looking for CDers are other CDers.

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This sums the whole thing up. Prior to being in a relationship with a CDer, I was pretty much as JessM describes. Yeah, CDers are pretty easy to spot - maybe on a doubletake, but yes we, the general public, notice you but we certainly don't go looking for you.

IMHO, you are all so hung up on copying the styles and mannerisms of women that I think you spend an inordinate amount of time when you're out watching others. You may or may not be looking for CDers but for the other 99% it is not something they think about except when they spot one. I can promise you the "entertainment lasts about as long as a television commercial - if that. I certainly don't believe there are CDing Vigilantes out there. Of course like G/L there are still plenty of bigots out there who could react much the way a small-minded hateful person would.