Last night.........

My soon to be ex-husband told me he still loved me.
I told him to come over and prove it.
Using my seductive feminine wiles I convinced
him and to my surprise he appeared.
I had two new outfits waiting. I ordered him
naked, I lathered him nair, I forced him into the
shower, i assisted in the final removal of all hair.
I painted his toenails. I moisturized him from neck to toe.
I insisted he dress in the peach mini skirt, peach top and
white over shirt. He rocked my world.
Tonight I invited him over again!
I carefully inspected his entire body, NO HAIR. Good!
I bathed him. Loofa, shampoo, lotion, pefume, thong
nylons, mini skirt, cami, 4 inch pumps, make-up and wig.
I'm cooking Vera a steak, potato and broccoli right now!
Later she's going to change into something a bit more provocative.
Later she's going to take care of me.
I can not wait.
I am so turned on by doing what makes her happy.
She looks so f'ing beautiful.
She said she feels so hot and so beautiful.
She said that whatever I want...name it...it's mine.
All I want is her, I can't wait to take her into my arms,
my lips, my bed.
Bur first I must feed her, I must make sure she
is nourished enoough to last for the next few hours.
I know that she will be grateful and extremely
sensiive to my needs!
Man! What a woman!

Did I miss something? Why is she going to be your ex-husband?

It's a long story, but we're not!
Not if I can help it!
Truth is we have both agreed to the divorce.
We will probably be divorced in 80 days or so.
But tonight.........she is mne!
I will have her!

He is here with me. My(our) house!
Only he is not a he at the moment.
And if I could figure out how to work my new didgital
camera, I would show you just how beautiful
s/he is.

Could I get you to call my wife and run those instructions by her please?:heehee:

ummm might wanna check the laws in your state.

here, if two people "sleep" together, it voids the divorce~having "marital relations" equals reconciliation and you have to start the process all over again.

Or maybe you "know" this already, and this is the method to your madness? :D :devil:

Kinda loosing you on the divorce thing??? Is this something Vera wants too?
I mean both the dressing and the divorce? You two seem more like newlyweds than those making a second trip before the judge.

Colleen

Yeah, right now its definately a love/hate thing going on

JD has been showing me the time of my life here the last couple of days

Dont really understand just where this may be going, but I am happy to be

along for the ride!!!

This is like a train wreck, yanno you ain't supposed to look, but ya just can't help yourself.

For the life of me, I just don't "get" this, but oh well, whatever blows your skirt(s) up.

Train wreck is right. Sometimes I just want to switch tracks, and sometimes I

just want the famiiarity of the life I loved. The life I used to have.

Somethings are hard to give up, and others are easy to jump back in to

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Vera Lynn

Train wreck is right. Sometimes I just want to switch tracks, and sometimes I

just want the famiiarity of the life I loved. The life I used to have.

Somethings are hard to give up, and others are easy to jump back in to

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Hmm, I doubt either of the women in your life would be flattered at being compared to a train track that you simply switch over and ride one for a while, then switch to the other.

I do agree however, that *someone* is getting taken for a ride.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GG Vanya

I do agree however, that *someone* is getting taken for a ride.

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Yep same here. Sounds a bit strange to me. sorry

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sandra GG

Yep same here. Sounds a bit strange to me. sorry

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I applied my gutter mind and came up with a rather different interpretation than I think you might have ;)

From what I recall of an earlier (a week ago) thread, my overall interpretation is that something, none of our business, interfered with their marriage and they were set to separate. It sounds, though, as if they may have found a new lease of life on it, and they are incredibly excited about it. :)

Or possibly we're seeing a classic manifestation of a certain type of internet forumite, down to the rather typical formatting style used by one personality. So far I've seen 6 out of 14 markers, but I've not looked very hard.

No offense mean't there -- I'm not doubting you being real, rather emphasizing that your presentation to us of what is going on is perhaps a little crazed. If its real, enjoy it, and save the posts for when you've come down off cloud 9 :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KarenSusan

Did I miss something? Why is she going to be your ex-husband?

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It's a complex situaaion (aren't they always). If you want to get up to speed on what led to the divorce proceedings, you might want to check some of Vera's earlier threads. Eg

Shown how to feel good......

CD and Divorce

Robin

Quote:

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Originally Posted by JD Jade Dream GG

... We will probably be divorced in 80 days or so...

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Being from over the pond, I am not familiar with divorce laws in your part of the world. Having said that though, divorced in 80 days is either the quickest divorce I know, or there is some conniving going on here.

Whilst divorces can be friendly, I have never known one to be this friendly, especially so close to the end. :2c:

Nigella

I think you will find the agreement to divorce was taken some time ago
It seems to be they are into the last 80 days of the minimum period required.


I don't doubt this story as I know of someone(non CD) who is getting divorced, and him and his wife cant seem to live together or live apart

Hope you have more success with whatever you decide in the end.

This is from Vera's "CD and divorce" thread:

As some of you know I am in the beginning stages of what is a VERY nasty divorce. My STBX has already outed me with my children, Employees, Family, Friends, Community, and anyone else who happens with-in her voice

I have a minimum 3 months to go before my divorce is final. I know for a fact she has been compiling information on me and my "Sick, Perverted, Sex addicted obsession with Cross Dressing" She has posted on other forums stats on just how much lingerie ,she thinks I have (Grossley exagerated in some instances) I am tryin to lay low and just not piss her off too much until the deed is done, but I know anything I do between now and then will be put out there to the court and my community for all to see.
On one hand, now that I live alone, I am experiencing new freedoms, Free to dress, and purchase items with no quilt or fear of ridicule. On the other hand I am leary that I am digging myself further, and just giving her more ammo against me.

I guess i should just stop for a few months, but honestly,being able to be who I really am, is really helping me through these very difficult times

Vera, RE READ this post of yours. Hopefully you'll get my "drift" without me having to put it in words.

Thanks everyone for the kind (and even not so kind) thoughts
I can assure you that JD and I are indeed two seperate people, and are both members here

The whole traintrack comment came off the wrong way. Though there was another women that came between my wife and I , destroying a 21 year old relationship, I am no longer involved with her, and never will be. I am not, "switching" between partners as that came off as sounding

Yes, JD hurt me beyond words with my outing, but it was in retaliation for my ultimate betrayal of her(the affair)

We have 3 childern together, a beautiful house and years of experiencs together. Even though we are o the edge of divorce, we do still have feelings, and yes, we still love each other. The past few months have just had too much hate and hurt mixed in to really show it to each other



We live in Washngton State, and divorce taks a MINIMUM of 90 days after filing, and yes we are in the midst of that 90 days.

Who knows, maybe a reconcilliation is on the horizon, just too early to tell
I think that if that does happen, then it would be a beautiful thing to embrace, and not a horrible thing as some of you are inferring

Jade & Vera,

I think Jade has gone through an accelerated learning program in the few weeks she's been here. And I'm sure Vera's feelings have changed a bit, too. Do you both feel that you can forgive each other for the hurt that you have inflicted on each other?

Best of luck to both of you.

Robin

sounds like to me you should be putting this divorce on hold and going to a marriage guidance counsellor as you clearly love each other and your wife is clearly loving your female side :), yes there has been hurt in the past through affairs and such but it doesnt have to end here, if you dont want it too and clearly you dont

I want to echo the feelings of others who think that a reconciliation is possible. It seems to me that you love each other passionately. Possibly, the hurting each other that you both did, was a reflection of that love? That you hurt each other so passionately, only because you love each other so passionately? (I know, that's a sick way to love each other, but you wouldn't be the first.)

If that's so, please each of you, take a deep breath. Stop the divorce. Get some counseling on HOW to love. Put some serious breaks on lashing out, and learn to communicate what hurts you.

Please do that, and if after you've learned that, reassess whether divorce is right for you.

Sounds to me like you've got too much to just throw it all away, but that's just my :2c:

Rikki

I think it's a nice story, and really doen't have to be that complicated.

You know eachother better than ya know anyone else.

There has been hurt, mistakes made, some meanness, and a breakup.

You're comfortable with eachother, as you should be after so long, and realise that there's still alotta love here.

You're having fun.

And maybe saving something precious to ya both. Eachother.

It may work out between you two, it may not. Guess you should be prepared for both. You both certainly seem capable of forgiveness. And it sounds like yer havin' SO much fun!

Continue, see what unfolds, and heck, keep posting and sharing, whether on cloud nine, or feet planted on the ground. Don't overanylize it all. I don't think ya have to.

Wishing you both luck and happiness.

Hugs,

Melissa:happy:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Vera Lynn

Thanks everyone for the kind (and even not so kind) thoughts
I can assure you that JD and I are indeed two seperate people, and are both members here

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Again, not my intent to suggest otherwise; rather that the signals being given off are a little haywire and that perhaps sharing this as we happens won't be good for either of you whatever is going on. Its perhaps too emotionally charged or too personal?

I can admire Jade for taking charge and embracing a new step, but I think you can both only risk hindering or hurting a good thing by looking outward rather than inward right now.

Edit: IMHO ;)

sounds to good to be real. it just don't add up. i think that there is more to it than meets the eye.
sue ellan.

I simply can't ignore the gravitational affect on my leg.

Either way, it's drama in its finest form is it not?:tongueout

OK
It's 2 days later
God, it's been fun!
We are at his house right now,
everything 'normal' if there is a normal.
Nothng is settled in the divoce.
Nothing is settled in the hard process of letting go.
I cannot explain why I keep trying to seduce him.
I cannot explain why I am not angry ALL the time about
what he has done. Why is he not angry all the time abut what
I did? We sometimes just want to 'keep it light'.
We sometimes just want to enjoy the sexual side of our relationship.
Believe me, sometimes it's extremely heavy and we don't speak
for a time. When that happens, I miss him. He's my best friend.
Or he was. And sometimes he still is. And the roller coaster
ride just starts again. Where was this passion 6 monhs ago?
Where was the spark needed to light the marital fire? I let it burn
out, then he did. If only we had realized before the embers died,
if only we had discovered you guys, if only.......a lot of things.

No matter, damage is done.
Love is still love.
My husband is still my husband. For now..
He is special. He has proven, even after the unforgiveable affair, to
still be important to me. Our kids LOVE him. He is forever integrated
in my life.

Perhaps in 78 days, I will seek something and someone new.
Perhaps in 78 days I will have successfully enticed him back home.
Too hard to tell right now!
Stay tuned and you will all know what happens as we
are trying to figure it all out.

JD

Jade: We don't really know the particulars [nor need to], but as you might have seen from other threads here, the whole cd/femme thing can be chaotically confusing, and lead guys to make stupid mistakes without neccessarily meaning to make them. If mistakes have been made, its your place to decide whether to accept them or not, and nobody's place to tell you whether you are right or wrong in how you feel

If you are looking to repair things, to find a way forward, to try and understand why things might have happened, then there are folks here who have suffered mistakes they've made and moved on from them, others for whom their mistakes were irreconcilable, and others who have been saved from them.

It sounds like you've both found a new spark in things, and that something is still there to save. But I suspect both your posts here are as confusing to each other as they are to us, which may neuter anything good that remains...

Good Luck !

hmmm.. let's see here, she outed you to everyone and now she want's you to stay, even though she has told everyone. I think I would have an evening on the town with her. Everyone who matters knows anyway, and now you two can go out as girlfriends and shop till you drop.

Your out now, and that's "under the bridge", so I would suggest that you try to get over the hurt and see how willing she is to truly accept you and go out with you, since she is the one who "outed" you and now she wants you to stay, lets see how well she faces the music, and, if she faces it with a smile on her face, I think you two have all the makings of a beautiful marriage here.

I wish both of you the best of luck. Talk with each other and be honest.:happy:

Love, was not the problem.
Sex, not a problem.
CD, no problem.
Cheating, MAJOR problem.
Retalitory betrayal....MAJOR problem.
I did NOT out him to the entire plant.
I did not tell everyone.
I kept his secret for 21 years.
I told my councelor, my lawyer, and E-maled his gf/secretary.
After that, I read the e-mail to his 26 year old twins,
Then I told my 2 sisters and a couple of my friends.
All in the space of one hateful weekend.
Sure I regretted it, I felt bad. I feel bad. I am sorry.
The biggest problem in my eyes is that she is sill his secretary.
So what if they are not sleeping together anymore.
He will not leave his job. Nor will he fire his assistant.
I have a problem with that.
I am convinced that this friendship/employee is a marriage breaker,
He is not able/willing to end it. (sexual harassment/wrongful termination)
He's stuck. I'm stuck. Get the picture.
I get the picture. I do not like the photo.
If I could I would delete the problem.
Otherwise, the marriage could be saved.
He can't do it. I can't save it.
The end of it is near. The love is proving difficult to ignore.
Difficult to save. Easy to feel.
The whole thing is complicated. He's not 100% sure it should end.
I never wanted it to end. I have only agreed(under the circumstances)
that it has to end.
6 months ago....
I could have told you that my husband was
1000% faithful.
1000% trustable.
completely worthy of everyone's respect.
My, how things have changed.
My, how my thoughts and opinion of him have changed.
My, how some of my thoughts and feelings haven't.
My, how bizarre my life has been.
It's like the Jerry Springer go-round.
I HATE Jerry Springer!

It's like a bad poetry jam in here.

I hate Jerry too. I also hate when one partner in the relationship stumbles and it creates an avalanche that seems to get worse and worse. I do hope you two are able to take the time to get things figured out without making any more emotional decisions that accomplish nothing more than anger, pain, regret and sorrow. :hugs:

If the divorcees sleep together, it voids the divorce? HuH! Anyway, Jade, if it's a "point and shoot" camera with a "Auto" position, just set the pixel count(resolution) to the lowest setting, and take the pictures.

Vikki

Quote:

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Originally Posted by vbcdgrl

If the divorcees sleep together, it voids the divorce? HuH! Anyway, Jade, if it's a "point and shoot" camera with a "Auto" position, just set the pixel count(resolution) to the lowest setting, and take the pictures.

Vikki

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I didn't say "divorcees". This law pertains to the separation period BEFORE the divorce is final. Censensual sexual relations are regarded as reconciliation. i.e. all is forgiven

Quote:

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Originally Posted by JD Jade Dream GG

The biggest problem in my eyes is that she is sill his secretary.
So what if they are not sleeping together anymore.
He will not leave his job. Nor will he fire his assistant.
I have a problem with that.

---

Fair enough. I think a lot of people would have a problem with that, Jade.
I didn't realize the "other woman" was his secretary. I know some PAs can get very protective towards their boss.

Vera says that he turned to her because he needed a woman to discuss CD issues with, and you weren't interested. He also claims that he became emotionally close to her, but didn't sleep with her until after he moved out of home. At least that's better than a full-on sexual affair behind your back, isn't it?

Robin

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GG Vanya

I simply can't ignore the gravitational affect on my leg.

Either way, it's drama in its finest form is it not?:tongueout

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I think this is one of those "truth is stranger than fiction" scenarios. It's just too bizarre to be made-up. Did you read the thread where Vera had to rescue Jade when the car she was in went off the road & into the Pacific Ocean? That's so weird it has to be true. :)

I can't wait for the telemovie. :)

Seriously, I can imagine a CD making up a story like this, but why would a GG do it? I assume, with the GG after her name, that JD Jade Dream is the genuine article...

Robin

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kieron Andrew

sounds like to me you should be putting this divorce on hold and going to a marriage guidance counsellor as you clearly love each other and your wife is clearly loving your female side :), yes there has been hurt in the past through affairs and such but it doesnt have to end here, if you dont want it too and clearly you dont

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:iagree: And hopefully it's not like a new candy. Great at first but one gets weary of it soon.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Robin Leigh

Fair enough. I think a lot of people would have a problem with that, Jade.
I didn't realize the "other woman" was his secretary. I know some PAs can get very protective towards their boss.

Vera says that he turned to her because he needed a woman to discuss CD issues with, and you weren't interested. He also claims that he became emotionally close to her, but didn't sleep with her until after he moved out of home. At least that's better than a full-on sexual affair behind your back, isn't it?

Robin

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Robin,
Did he really say that?
He didn't need someone else to discuss CD with. He needed a friend.
Friends are great. I had no problem with her as a friend.
She was our friend. Progressed from honest friendship to emotional
affair. Crossed that line to kissing. I found out. Wanted it over.
He said he wanted to save marriage. Too many arguments about her.
He gets hotel for 2 weeks, Sleeps with her. Was he moved out?
Or did he leave so he could fullfill his desire for her? IMO he was
still married. Behind my back or in my face, sleeping with someone
else is never justifiable if you are married.
He'd much more prefer noone know about CD, so I believe.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Robin Leigh

I think this is one of those "truth is stranger than fiction" scenarios. It's just too bizarre to be made-up. Did you read the thread where Vera had to rescue Jade when the car she was in went off the road & into the Pacific Ocean? That's so weird it has to be true. :)

I can't wait for the telemovie. :)

Seriously, I can imagine a CD making up a story like this, but why would a GG do it? I assume, with the GG after her name, that JD Jade Dream is the genuine article...

Robin

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Again to Robin,
This story is true but taken out of context,
I was a passenger in a car that went 50 mph into Vaughn Bay.
Vera did not rescue me but was helpful in taking care of
the details the next day. I am grateful for the help.
You assume correctly about me being a GG.

Hi Jade,

Quote:

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Originally Posted by JD Jade Dream GG

Robin,
Did he really say that?

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I'm was pretty sure he did, but I can't find a quote for you. Anyway, I got the impression you knew about Vera's Cding from the start of your marriage, but were never supportive.

Quote:

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He didn't need someone else to discuss CD with. He needed a friend.
Friends are great. I had no problem with her as a friend.
She was our friend. Progressed from honest friendship to emotional
affair. Crossed that line to kissing. I found out. Wanted it over.

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Kissing may not seem like a big deal to some, but I know I wouldn't be happy with that situation. You had every right to demand a stop to this liason for the sake of your marriage, IMHO.

Quote:

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He said he wanted to save marriage. Too many arguments about her.
He gets hotel for 2 weeks, Sleeps with her. Was he moved out?
Or did he leave so he could fullfill his desire for her? IMO he was
still married. Behind my back or in my face, sleeping with someone
else is never justifiable if you are married.

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It's not justifiable, but it seems that Vera was seriously thinking of leaving you at that stage, Jade. It looks like the two of you have different understandings about what sort of behaviour is acceptable & what crosses the line. You really need to discuss this & work out where your boundaries really lie, rather than assuming you know where each other is at. Because of familiarity, it's easy for partners to assume they both see things pretty much the same way, when in reality they have quite different perspectives.

Quote:

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He'd much more prefer noone know about CD, so I believe.

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Being a CD, you get used to being secretive, especially those of us from the older generations. And we can react in a really nasty manner when outed involuntarily, especially when it is done in malice...

Quote:

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This story is true but taken out of context,
I was a passenger in a car that went 50 mph into Vaughn Bay.
Vera did not rescue me but was helpful in taking care of
the details the next day. I am grateful for the help.

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Sorry, I got that jumbled up a bit. But he did come to your emotional rescue & help get the car out of the bay the next day, didn't he? He obviously feels a sense of duty & is protective towards you.

Quote:

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You assume correctly about me being a GG.

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That's what you say. :p Actually, I was just diplomatically pointing out to other readers that you must be a GG, since you don't get GG after your name without verification. A CD might make up a story like this, but a GG? I don't think so, Tim. :)

Robin

Quote:

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Originally Posted by JD Jade Dream GG

Love, was not the problem.
The biggest problem in my eyes is that she is sill his secretary.
So what if they are not sleeping together anymore.
He will not leave his job. Nor will he fire his assistant.
I have a problem with that.
I am convinced that this friendship/employee is a marriage breaker,
He is not able/willing to end it. (sexual harassment/wrongful termination)
He's stuck. I'm stuck. Get the picture.
I get the picture. I do not like the photo.

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I understand the problem you both have. Since the affair was consensual by both parties harassment is most likely not an issue. Office affairs are still pretty common. He should get HR involved. HR will simply offer an equal or better position to the admin and that is that.

Warm regards,
Christina Nicole