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  1. #1
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    We live in the Stone Age still...

    It seems like out society is still living in the stone age. We claim to be an advanced society but look at how we treat each other. I mean years ago women were not able to vote, African Americans were not considered equal, Jews were imprisioned in concentration camps, Homosexuality was considered evil, then in each case society did change for the better, but it still seems we still daily hold prejudices aganst specific groups that do not meet societys definition of "normal" transgendered people are still being treated like we are animals or something less than a person. And people still claim we are "Advanced" seems the only thing we are advancing is finding different groups to target for hatred and to judge. When will we ever look at each other with true equality and acceptance of another human being without trying to impose our own standards on another person? I apologize for running off on a rant just really need to let some steam out, I keep seeing people judging other people when they are not in any position to judge another. I am not talking about this site but of society. ok rant over lol :>
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  2. #2
    aka Tracy Noxvictum's Avatar
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    Generally why I'm antisocial. That's what happens when society focuses on understanding everything else before understanding each other. We've got phones that play our music, check our email/facebook/myspace, and other useless crap, but differences in other people? Ugh... Makes me want to rant too...
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    XpoisonXgirlX Kayla Shadows's Avatar
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    lol,wow...umm....I hear what you are saying though.Feel free to rant.I know people who still get insults,nasty messages,threats of harm,death and so on.Its not a perfect world...but you can at least be happy that you are not the person spreading hate into the world.You are a advancement within yourself..just like many here and many other people in the world who are allowing their minds to open.Something is better than nothing.
    Last edited by Kayla Shadows; 03-19-2009 at 10:57 PM.
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    Senior Member Christina Horton's Avatar
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    For me I have been out 11 time's and have gone to place's I know people as Mike whom don't know , and I have never had a bad time of it. Granted I have not been out much LOL ( i am still counting how many time's i have been out) LOL. Still I know what you mean. But just thing about it, if the homosexuaity had not come to the light if mr. and mis. jo plublic where would we be. I can see it now a group of red necks tracking down and beeting up a CDer and no one caring , The CDers protest march's, The crossdresser pride praide , and all the moivies and TV show we would have by now. They blazed a trail all we have to do it make it bigger. It will come we just need to bash the public on the head like they did and we to might be at the same place in 10 or 15 years. People need time to find out what we are all about and be educakated (Spell spell bad) but that for (someone else to start right)not us!!!!! So give them a little slak just a little mind you, we don't want a rabbie dog running lose LOL. I know you wanted and need to blow off steem but that's my HUGGS
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    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
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    There will always be those who can't accept others who are different, but i don't think we should give all of society a bad rap. There are more and more of us venturing out, and finding the experience to be positive. Everyday, right here in this forum I see stories of someone taking a chance and "going out enfemme", "went shopping", "went to dinner". "had fun" "so exciting".
    I haven't seen a lot of stories of outtings that went really bad. I mean you do hear stories of things that did hapen, but not many first hand ?? A news story, something in the paper. Sometimes you hear stories of things that happened more in the past than present. And i am betting that if you ask the ones who have braved it they're gonna say..It was a little scary, but it was wonderful, and if you ask them if they'ed do it again..... you'ed get a big YES!
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    i'm afraid that cross dressers and and transexuals are behind gays in acceptance. We are much further behind than people of color.

  7. #7
    Banned Read only battybattybats's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mannph View Post
    i'm afraid that cross dressers and and transexuals are behind gays in acceptance. We are much further behind than people of color.
    Cause we are behind them in doing stuff about it!

    At Compton and Stonewall some Cds and TSs stood up for themselves.. Gays and Lesbians in their thousands got inspired and followed and what they have now is from the hard work following that inspiration! But the rest of us Cds and Tss kept hiding and watched and grew jeolous while the handful of brave CDs and TSs were left unsopported.

    Maybe if we just stop pretending everything is too hard and do exactly what everyone else has done before us we too could reap the benefits. It's not like we are pioneers, the path is well paved with not just generations but over a century of examples!

  8. #8
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    I am happy things worked out well for the other groups, I just hope in years down the road we are just as accepted as they are today. Its not all of society but it seems like an established norm today.
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    Senior Member Intertwined's Avatar
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    Makes me think of what I learned in church, forgive me if I butcher this.

    Let the person among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.
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    They call me quiet girl.. Sarah...'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by battybattybats View Post
    Maybe if we just stop pretending everything is too hard and do exactly what everyone else has done before us we too could reap the benefits. It's not like we are pioneers, the path is well paved with not just generations but over a century of examples!
    Now there's a sensible comment. It's not too hard.

    I've had enough. I'm challenging people's perceptions now wherever and whenever they arise. My wife and I are rapidly reaching a "right" feeling about how we manage my transition and it looks like we'll be doing a lot of educating.

    Sarah...

  11. #11
    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mannph View Post
    i'm afraid that cross dressers and and transexuals are behind gays in acceptance. We are much further behind than people of color.
    The key word in your sentence is afraid
    "one day I'll fly away..... leave all this to yesterday"

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  12. #12
    Banned Read only battybattybats's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kellycan27 View Post
    The key word in your sentence is afraid
    Good call Kelly!!!!!!!!

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    Oh my god, I'm a girl! jazmine's Avatar
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    I live on a border between two city's. One thinks it's better than the other, so it put up a wall on a cross street keeping the likes of my neighborhood from dumping into theirs. To go into that city, I have to go all the way around. Either put up a house there, or take the F-ing wall down you stupid humans! It looks like ass, and only signafies how UNADVANCED us earthlings are. There is no need for that wall. It's not like there is store or resturaunt traffiic trying to cut across. We are smack-dab in the middle of a neighborhood! God!.....heaven for bid "that" type of people come into our neighborhood!
    Mass extinction occur regularly, every 62 million to 65 million years. The last great mass extinction, the one that took out the dinosaures and all, occured 65 million years ago. We are now overdue. Hopefully the next species on the top of the food chain can get past their "growing pains" without forever repeating it like we have been. How one person's color,creed,class,sexual orientation,religion,gender,personality, and choice of clothing can effect a stranger's own life is beyond me. JEEZ!!!
    Yes, we have come along way as human beings, but we STILL trip over the TINIEST of hurddles, and land right on our faces. Quite strange indeed!
    So I like dressing like girl. BIG DEAL!

  14. #14
    I hate pants Gabrielle Hermosa's Avatar
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    Well put, Ashlyee.

    Yeah - we're still in the stone age when it comes to social acceptance of differences. When I take a look around, I honestly wonder who the hell got to make up all the rules about what is and what is not acceptable. I mean really - WHO started all of this?

    Who thought it would be a good idea for people to be forced into only 1 of two gender categories?

    Who invented gender categories?

    What the hell is a gender category?

    What exactly do the haters fear?

    Exactly what is so terrible about a man wanting to be pretty, feminine, and look good?

    What does the word "freedom" mean if it does not apply to crossdressers? The word freedom seems to be overused in many ways, but what the hell?

    Why is it normal to force people to remain closeted and hide their true selves from the world and not normal to be oneself?

    What IS normal? Who gets to decide that? Really! I want to know, because I've got a bone to pick with this guy! I've got a LOT of bones to pick with this guy.

    Ok, now I'm just rambling on with my own irritations about the social stone ages we live in. Preaching to the choir here, but we all got to get it out, right?

    Time to get out of the 1950's when it comes to transgendered issues, society. Wake up, smell the coffee, and get your heads out of your asses. Can't shove this square peg in a round hole forever.
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  15. #15
    Silver Member Lisa Golightly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ashlyee Paige View Post
    When will we ever look at each other with true equality and acceptance of another human being without trying to impose our own standards on another person?
    When there is only one man standing probably...
    Der Transsexuellaußenseiter

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  16. #16
    Tricia Dale tricia_uktv's Avatar
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    Lets try and put a positive spin on things. Take away those who are still homophobic and racist. They will always exist and would obviously be very anti-us too.

    Then look around. The level of acceptance I get is amazing. The people who want to talk to me genuinely about my experiences, especiall amongst the young, I find astounding.

    Things aren't so bad and there will always be some. What we really need is more of us to come out to gain greater acceptance and credibility.

    In about six hours time I will walk through the centre of Manchester fully dressed. Certain places I will avoid because I know thats where the bigots are. Elsewhere I will be accepted by shop keepers, barstaff, tram drivers, waiters and waitresses, everybody. They will all smile at me and talk to me.

    And walking around the shopping centre I will get fifty more smiles than comments. Thats fifty more smiles than I would get if I walked round as a bloke.

    Life isn't so bad; its actually fun, so enjoy it!

    Nothing wrong with having a good whinge though
    I strut my stuff, I feel so proud,
    I need to shout, to scream out loud,
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    I am who I want to be

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  17. #17
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    I'm lovin' the spleen that's been spilling here...

    ...but sure you gotta admit that some progress is being made. Trouble is it's on a time scale that pisses us off, eh?

    Just as most of us here are taking the baby steps to come out as the people we wanna be, so to is "society" (whoever that is!). But society's baby steps are glacial compared to those af any given individual. So it took me 50 years to accept myself fully.

    Unless there's a global revolution led by drag queens, (who require that everyone crossdresses after they win...LOL!), society will take a long, long time to get to the stage of tolerance for ALL. Probably never will!

    A thing about us humans, is that we always need someone to hate, someone to marginalize. It's the way we express our individuality and ego. And it happens on every scale in our lives, from the global to the personal. Some are more serious than others.

    There's a race we feel superior to. There's a country we feel superior to. There's an education level we feel superior to. There's a career choice we feel superior to. There's a neighborhood that ours is superior to. There's a neighbor who has an uglier house than ours. There's a cousin who has worse hair than ours. There's a tranny sister whose makeup looks like her 3 year old did it.

    Some we can and need to get over. Some we never will.

    What happens when we finally give and get acceptance from all segments? Well...then we pick out another group we don't like...like those damn genetic freaks with type O blood.

    (Whoa...how 'bout that? A little rant that's actually a touch optimistic...but just a touch! )
    Last edited by deja true; 03-20-2009 at 06:49 AM.

  18. #18
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    The fact is that we are just plain different from most folks. From our all inclusive feelings to our acceptance levels. We are thrust into a society wherein most folks are light years behind us. How well we do really depends on how well we tolerate others even if it takes longer than we would like. Having patience really is a virtue.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  19. #19
    Platinum Member Sheila's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deja true View Post
    "society" (whoever that is!).
    That be all of us included there then

    Quote Originally Posted by deja true View Post
    What happens when we finally give and get acceptance from all segments? Well...then we pick out another group we don't like...like those damn genetic freaks with type O blood.
    right why u picking on me now ................... go find somebody else to beat up ................... do you know how many of us O Neg there are ............... I am now feeling marginalized

    If the majotity of you stopped feeling damned sorry for yourself and actually went out and interacted with Joe/Josie public you would find most of em would not give a damn about your dress ................... far more attention (negative) is given to far more groups than CDers, people with speech impediments, eye twitches, dwarfism, people in wheelchairs are all abused on a regular basis, not right but they get on and deal with it on a daily basis, time for you to as well
    I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
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  20. #20
    Senior Member vivianann's Avatar
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    Since coming out to everybody about my crossdressing, my life has become better because of it. opportunities are coming my way, I am happier, peaple are welcoming Vivian with open arms, peaple in my small home town and peaple in the big city seem to be accepting, yes I am sure that there are peaple out there who are against us being crossdressers, but you know what I could care less about those peaple because there are many more accepting peaple in my opinion, and the reason I say this is because of the many wonderful experiences in the last three yrs since I have come out in public.
    The problem is we as a group are letting fear control our lives, which causes us to become bitter and to look at society as being some kind of mean monster. I do understand that there are those here in the forum who have families, and there wives and families needs should come before their desires to crossdress, to you I understand because you made a commitment to your wife when you married her, you need to honor those vows you took on your wedding day. . I know that there are many of us who can and should blaze a trail for those of us who cannot at this time, I for one am one of those who can make a difference for the crossdressing community, and I am out there almost everyday as Vivian in public educating peaple that we are not wierdos or freaks, I am showing them that we are normal, and we just like wearing clothes that makes us feel complete. The thing we need to do is dress age appropriate, and occasion appropriate, so peaple will not see a freak when they see us. By dressing appropriate peaple will see us as being respectful and in turn they will be more likely to be accepting, I know this because I am experiencing acceptance as a result of dressing appropriate and descent when out in public. It is not a perfect world out there, but it is far better than most peaple reallize. With all that I have said, we need to be careful where we go when we are enfemme, avoid dark area's, dont go to bars where there might be trouble, now get dressed and go out and have fun.
    I risked losing my business because I came out, however my business has improved since I have come out, so there is hope out there my fellow sisters.

  21. #21
    Silver Member JoAnne Wheeler's Avatar
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    I believe that CROSSDRESSERS as a group are treated the worst by society

    out of ignorance, discrimination, and hostility. You can be gay and most

    will not regonize - but you can't be an open crossdresser without being

    recognixed - it just plain SUCKS !


    JoAnne Wheeler
    "I'm an all American Bluegrass Girl and Proud As I Can Be"

  22. #22
    Banned Read only battybattybats's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoAnne Wheeler View Post
    I believe that CROSSDRESSERS as a group are treated the worst by society

    out of ignorance, discrimination, and hostility. You can be gay and most

    will not regonize - but you can't be an open crossdresser without being

    recognixed - it just plain SUCKS !


    JoAnne Wheeler
    JoAnne. Take a gander at The Day Of Rememberance lists. Yes there are some murdered Cds on the list but there are more murdered Transsexuals. Yes there are murderd white CDs and TSs on the list but there are vastly more African American ones!

    In fact if your an African American MtF Transsexual by official figures for the numbers of transsexuals in the population then your are 3 times more liekly to be murdered than die of any other cause! http://aebrain.blogspot.com/2009/01/...ranswomen.html

    So nope, crossdressers, especially white ones, are far from the most badly treated group!

    I suggest that people living with many mental illnesses get treated worse than us still too.

    Quote Originally Posted by Arianna Daniels View Post
    The fact is that we are just plain different from most folks. From our all inclusive feelings to our acceptance levels. We are thrust into a society wherein most folks are light years behind us. How well we do really depends on how well we tolerate others even if it takes longer than we would like. Having patience really is a virtue.
    I have yet to hear of one kind of experience we go through that other minorities dont go through and did not once as much as we do now. Closeting, passing (like some people of colour passing for white!), hopelessness, internalised self hatred, violence and the fear of violence, abandonment by family and friends and wives and children, employment discrimination...

    I've seen these exact same experiences in writings about the past and current experiences of other minorities. The following have/had some of that list:

    Women, non-whites, immigrants, indiginous peoples, gays lesbians and bisexuals, every religious group not at the time in the majority prior to the last century or so.

    What experiences of CDS are unique through history? None I know of! And yet we balk at imagining that what worked for all these other groups could work for us!

    Quote Originally Posted by deja true View Post
    ...but sure you gotta admit that some progress is being made. Trouble is it's on a time scale that pisses us off, eh?
    Currently it's slow, cause most of us aren't doing anything about it and so it is a tiny few making any changes. But like womens rights and many more once enough got behind it massive changes occured in a single liftime. Gays are comparable in numbers to CDs. There's likely more CDs! Yet most Gay rights occurred post-Stonewall, thats only a 40 year timeframe from being arrested and tortured in electric shock 'treatments' to same-sex marriage in several countries and states! And with lots of improvements throughout those 40 years!

    Unless there's a global revolution led by drag queens, (who require that everyone crossdresses after they win...LOL!), society will take a long, long time to get to the stage of tolerance for ALL. Probably never will!
    Well the gay rights movement was started by crossdressers and transsexuals rioting!

    It's amazing what we can start. Just the Gays got behind their out few on the frontlines while we abandoned Sylvia Rivera and the others!

    If we do the same we too can have massive changes and swiftly!

  23. #23
    Gold Member TxKimberly's Avatar
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    Well, a simple explanation comes to my mind.

    Every group you mention that was once treated poorly stood up, worked, and fought for their current status.

    Women fought for their right to vote, they had to fight their own sons, husbands, and fathers, and lord help us, they even had to fight other women.
    African Americans fought a much longer and bloodier battle, standing up and demanding their rights, and demanding that the United States live up to the ideals of it's constitution.
    The Jews? It took a nation that tried to exterminate them to wake us up and slap the stupid out of us. It took the horror of the concentration camps and the horror of the very concepts involved before people decided they didn't want to be associated with that kind of thinking.
    Homosexuality - Very much like the women, they fought for their rights and recognition, the Homosexuals stood up for themselves.

    Now we reach the topic of the Transgendered. Yes I know that there are some out there working diligently for us, but they are few - very few. Most of us are hiding, not willing to participate in our own future for fear of being exposed. This is what BattyBattyBats keeps trying to subtly remind us all of. If you want the world to change about the way they treat and perceive us, we need to stop counting on others to carry our flag and fight our battles.
    WE need to stand up
    WE need to let people know that there are far more of us than they thought.
    We are their neighbors, husbands, friends, and co-workers.
    We know that we are a HUGE segment of the population. If we all decided "Damn it, that's enough of this!" and stood together, the world would change instantly.

  24. #24
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Kimberly wrote:
    Now we reach the topic of the Transgendered. Yes I know that there are some out there working diligently for us, but they are few - very few. Most of us are hiding, not willing to participate in our own future for fear of being exposed. This is what BattyBattyBats keeps trying to subtly remind us all of. If you want the world to change about the way they treat and perceive us, we need to stop counting on others to carry our flag and fight our battles.
    WE need to stand up
    WE need to let people know that there are far more of us than they thought.
    We are their neighbors, husbands, friends, and co-workers.
    We know that we are a HUGE segment of the population. If we all decided "Damn it, that's enough of this!" and stood together, the world would change instantly.
    Uh, instantly? Nope. Not likely to happen. Didn't work out that way for any of the other groups either, and besides, many of them are still discrimated against.

    Me, I spent my entire childhood being constantly picked on, frequently beaten. I always had to keep one eye looking over my shoulder to see if there was someone about to hit me for no particular reason other than because they could. Do I want to live the rest of my life the same way just so I can 'help the cause?' No thanks. As an adult, I had the birthmark removed that made me the target of so much scorn when I was a kid. I'm not about to use crossdressing to place another target firmly on my back.
    I'm exhausted enough just trying to get through the day as it is. In every revolution, there are leaders, followers, and just the many who are willing to support the ideas presented. Count me as one of the latter.

    As far as us being and 'advanced' society, well, only in relation to the animal societies on earth. Viewed from a distance, this planet is a mess. A hundred different countries, different rulers, different languages, warfare being conducted constantly throughout history, racial and ethnic extermination still going on, rich rulers doing unconscionable things to their employees and customers in every single nation, selling toxic products, conspiring to cheat each other on grand scales, I can go on and on. No, we are not an 'advanced' society. Not even close.
    Last edited by sometimes_miss; 03-21-2009 at 07:56 AM.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  25. #25
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Would you do it?

    Suppose the "worm" suddenly turned and the governments said that they would recognize the TG community and guarantee all of our rights? The only requirement on our part would be for us to come out openly so they would know who we are. I have the feeling that some would still have reservations doing that, especially those with SO's and families because while the "rights" may be guaranteed, safety from the potential "fall out" is not. There is always a hefty price to be paid in connection with recognition and equality. Even if riding on the coat tails of others, it has to be a personal decision on how to proceed and that is what makes being TG problematic.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

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