[QUOTE=GretchenM;4475424]I agree to a great extent with Micki's post. Fortunately, you had something done that can be reversed fairly easily although not without a lot of pain and another long recovery period. Maybe you really weren't ready for this change. If, in fact, you crossdress without the strong gender identity shift that is characteristic of the transgender then, in a sense, having permanent breast forms installed may have been inconsistent with your identity and has created a conflict.


Thank you for your comments and thoughts all are very welcome and valid, I realized going into this it was a big step for sure I read and thought long and hard prior to moving forward. I did a lot of self reflection and spoke to others I determined awhile back I did not feel like totally transitioning but wanted breasts. I started wearing forms throughout the day more and more and did not feel any anxiety in fact felt very natural which was when I decided to move forward with consultations and eventual surgery. AS I stated I ended up a C cup balanced out my frame well but maybe a bit larger than I figured. Again first few months were a bit over whelming for me recovering and all but once I started going out after the first few times I really began to feel confident I mean there were some awkward times with some people but it did not bother me. I was just so surprised afterwards that I was having panic attacks and started loosing self confidence

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No i never had any attacks or any symptoms of depression or such which really surprised me, I was really figuring on having any issues it would have happened in the beginning but again I was fine afterwards going out engaging with people. I had lots of explaining to do, but I had been wearing breast forms prior so it was not a total shock for people who knew me to see that alot thought my implants were a bit larger than the forms I had been wearing

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Quote Originally Posted by SirDonna View Post
Two questions: 1. presenting as male or female? 2. Has the therapist been able to identify a- the greatest fear, b- the triggers, and provided mental thoughts to deal with issues, basically mental behavior modification
I present as male I crossdressed a lot prior however since the surgery not so much now