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Thread: How far would you go to be "YOU " ?

  1. #1
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    How far would you go to be "YOU " ?

    This question came out of a thread in the NB section and my reply to another member .

    The point being made was only wearing forms or whatever with the agreement or acceptance of the wife/partner .

    From my personal perspective I don't consider myself going OTT because full time has meant finding a balance to achieve an identity , I still love my heels but I also love being accepted as a woman in the RW .

    I could be wrong but I feel many members wouldn't be OTT if they were allowed to find a balance , what they truly felt comfortable with . I also think when you reach that stage the wife / partner might find it perfectly acceptable .

    I appreciate this question assumes members want to be out in the RW or at least comfortably out of the closet . I also appreciate to some it is sexual so OTT is their ultimate goal given the opportunity .
    The real me , no going back.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member Angela1954's Avatar
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    Forgive my ignorance Theresa but what is OTT?

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Angela,
    Sorry OTT is over the top !
    The real me , no going back.

  4. #4
    Member cindylouho's Avatar
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    Maybe I'm even more ignorant than Angela, but by OTT do you mean going out with a 4" mini-skirt, 5" heels and 6 lbs of makeup?
    Be the best you, be the true you.
    That said, I love faceapp so much I change my avatar daily

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  5. #5
    Aspiring Member Star01's Avatar
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    I am more of a blend into the woodwork than over the top type of person. I prefer to spend quiet evenings at home and live close to an hour from the downtown Minneapolis night scene, something I would not be drawn to regardless of how I dress. Often with me it's not so much about the clothes as feminizing my body by shaving, coloring nails, and underdressing to the extent that I am able. I think more about actual physical changes than any item of clothing and am not sure where that puts me on the crossdresser spectrum. Regardless of my place I am not an OTT person and rarely go out at night anymore. Reading about the strong desire with many of my fellow forum members to get out and mingle leaves me feeling like I'm missing out on something but then I remind myself that if I had absolute freedom to do whatever I wanted I'd probably still be sitting home on Saturday nights. Probably in a dress and openly enjoying the experience but I'd still be sitting at home. That is just my personality and age coming out as I think a lot of people get clubbing out of their system by the time they reach 69.

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member Geena75's Avatar
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    Given that the 'You' ('Me?'), in my case, is my unvarnished self; not very far at all. How far would I go to be 'Geena' though; so far I have shaved my legs in the past, shaved some chest hair for the sake of my favorite dress, and slacked off on some less important chores. My farthest reaching fantasy, at present, would be to pass enough to take a drive and put gas in the vehicle.

  7. #7
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Cindy,
    I mean the whole package to be " YOU " If you were totally free what would your final balance of your look be , on a daily basis would you really want or need to wear high heels and have enormous boobs .

    Star,
    I feel you get my point . I must admit I've not given up on clubbing or partying the night away , I love my dancing too much even at 69 .

    Geena ,
    Is that your choice or the choice you're allowed to make , the reason I ask this question is without those restraints .

    OK if I give myself as an example my avatar picture was taken in an art room full of people , for me to be " ME " I wore the blue sweater and a denim skirt with 2" wedges . I was possibly the only one wearing a skirt that day but it felt OK .
    Last edited by Teresa; 12-17-2020 at 12:56 PM.
    The real me , no going back.

  8. #8
    Member cindylouho's Avatar
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    Dressing like a tart is something I'd leave for the bedroom, Halloween parties, or a trip to Vegas. I'd like to look sexy but classy, like Rachel Green from the TV show Friends. Expanding on this idea, if I had the dough to spend I'd have my nose, lips and eyes done, and would definitely consider breast implants as well.
    Be the best you, be the true you.
    That said, I love faceapp so much I change my avatar daily

    https://giphy.com/gifs/l0MYEWpv7Ue0RFVaE/html5

  9. #9
    Senior Member Pumped's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cindylouho View Post
    Maybe I'm even more ignorant than Angela, but by OTT do you mean going out with a 4" mini-skirt, 5" heels and 6 lbs of makeup?
    So........most of my pictures I post?

    I like over the top, no plans to blend in and pass, so bodycon dresses and crazy heels are my favs!

  10. #10
    Member CharlotteCD's Avatar
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    I've always found the oversexualised DDD sizes boobs etc to be ridiculous, and damaging to the way that people view us - I feel that they are part of the reason that crossdressing is classed as perverted by some.

    HOWEVER, if that's how people want to dress, who are we to say don't.

    For me, I like casual style. I like office smart. I like blending in, dressing how any 28-35 year old GG would dress. If I could pass and was accepted by my wife, that is how I would dress all the time.

  11. #11
    Aspiring Member Star01's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teresa View Post
    Star,
    I feel you get my point . I must admit I've not given up on clubbing or partying the night away , I love my dancing too much even at 69 .
    If your back, knees and hips allow you to dance at 69 by all means enjoy your nights out.

  12. #12
    Member cindylouho's Avatar
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    @ Pumped - Ok you got me, I had you in mind when I said that
    Be the best you, be the true you.
    That said, I love faceapp so much I change my avatar daily

    https://giphy.com/gifs/l0MYEWpv7Ue0RFVaE/html5

  13. #13
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    All of my dressing experience has centered around being conservative in my fashion choices. My favorite outfit would be a sweater or blouse with a matching skirt and low-heeled pumps or flats.

  14. #14
    Mature Member sara_also's Avatar
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    Well I have a very accepting wife, and am able to dress as I like at home, when we don't have company. At 76 years young I don't get out much, and have no desire to.
    Today I am wearing a dress, bra and boobs (a C cup) 2 inch heels. Full makeup, wig and ear rings.
    I couldn't be happier, and count my blessings every day.

  15. #15
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Maybe out of your depth here, Teresa? You've had a ton of experience living as a trans woman. But, how much experience have u actually had with Over The Top or fetish dressers?

    I have met hundreds of dressers and seen thousands in person. Including a number of regular T's that love sporting giant boobs and sky hi platform heels. And, then there r the truly over the top fetish dressers. Covered in rubber with hideous masks and obscenely large monster boobs sticking straight out. The more ridiculous looking, the better!

    To u and many others here, these dressers r ALL over the top. But, I submit as dressers, that's WHO THEY REALLY R!

    Just as many here r happy to just slip on a dress, forms, and a wig? Others here r like me, all or or nothing! It isn't dressing to me if I don't wear all my shaping gear, hip and butt pads, and tuck before putting on all the finishing touches.

    And, even tho few here approve or understand? Finally, a mask which allows me to appear female.
    That's as far as I have to go to be the CD called Sherry!
    Last edited by docrobbysherry; 12-17-2020 at 02:10 PM.
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  16. #16
    Member cindylouho's Avatar
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    Oh the stories you must have to tell Doc, you ought to write a book.
    Be the best you, be the true you.
    That said, I love faceapp so much I change my avatar daily

    https://giphy.com/gifs/l0MYEWpv7Ue0RFVaE/html5

  17. #17
    Aspiring Member Angela1954's Avatar
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    Thanks Teresa. Now that I know what OTT means I can reply. I love leggings and wear them often with a sweater or lighter top depending on the weather. I also like to wear short, tight dresses. At 5ft 6 135 I think I can pull it off. I am 66 so no way am I a spring chicken, but I think my petite size allows me to wear clothes a woman with a bigger build might not be able to.

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member Geena75's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teresa View Post
    Cindy,
    I mean the whole package to be " YOU " If you were totally free what would your final balance of your look be , on a daily basis would you really want or need to wear high heels and have enormous boobs .

    Star,
    I feel you get my point . I must admit I've not given up on clubbing or partying the night away , I love my dancing too much even at 69 .

    Geena ,
    Is that your choice or the choice you're allowed to make , the reason I ask this question is without those restraints .

    OK if I give myself as an example my avatar picture was taken in an art room full of people , for me to be " ME " I wore the blue sweater and a denim skirt with 2" wedges . I was possibly the only one wearing a skirt that day but it felt OK .
    It is my choice, and I'm pretty content with it. As far as how I would dress in public as Geena; I've always been a fan of legs in nylons, so I would want a hemline above the knee. I don't think huge bobs enhance Geena, so I'm happy with 'C' cup. Except for the mask, I'm pretty much there, take away about 10 lbs. or so.

  19. #19
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Sherry,
    You know that's not the point of my question , I also did make allowances for the fetish element in my thread . It's more about , truly finding youself based more in the RW , that is where you maybe out of your depth . It may be vanilla to you but it's my life now , not boring but very enjoyable .

    Geena ,
    Thanks for an honest answer .

    Star ,
    I do have arthritis in my big toes and my knees and also a problem with alignment of discs in my spine but it's not so bad I can't enjoy my nights out , I'll keep doing it as long as I can .
    Last edited by Teresa; 12-18-2020 at 06:16 AM.
    The real me , no going back.

  20. #20
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    If ya got it, flaunt it!! Enjoy life because it is just too damn short. We seem to die when we finally learn how to enjoy it. Start early and enjoy longer!

  21. #21
    Aspiring Member ShelbyDawn's Avatar
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    There can never be a single answer to a question like this, it will always depend on the motivations for dressing each individual brings to the table.
    Personally, I feel I'd be in line with Teresa, I just want to be comfortable and express who I truly am, no 6" stiletto's or micro mini skirts, although I do get compliments on my legs, and no overdone makeup, my personal style is not too flashy, but I do enjoy looking good and given the opportunity to dress as I wished, would do the same, just more skirts and cuter shoes, yes, lots of cuter shoes...
    I am Me and Me is OK!



    Shelby

  22. #22
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    I could go OTT (as Madonna would say) at the right venue. But I haven't kept it real low key either. I had a sexy sister and it's rubbed off on me somewhat!
    "You're the only one to see the changes you take yourself through", Stevie Wonder

  23. #23
    Member Brandi Christine's Avatar
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    What exactly is OTT, a woman getting dressed up for going out to the club or for her husband? Then yes I love to do that (the dressup part at least...). But for the last few sessions I was more into being able to go out and be somewhat accepted (Not that I really did that, still too afraid) so I dressed in jeans and wedges/sneakers and cute tops. I found a comfort level that I really liked.
    ...Damsel in distress.
    Not exactly natural, Stunning none the less...

    (As Girls Go by Suzanne Vega)

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member SaraLin's Avatar
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    If you were totally free what would your final balance of your look be , on a daily basis would you really want or need to wear high heels and have enormous boobs .
    Well If I were TOTALLY free, I like to think that I'd be seeking to pretty much blend in as "just" another woman in the crowd. Of course, it'd be a plus if I could be a pretty or least attractive, but I'd be content with people not looking at me with a "what's that?" or "hey, that's a dude!" or any such reaction. I just want to be "one of the girls".
    If, besides freedom, I had the resources, I'd probably pursue more medical options as well...


    OTT? not for me. I lack the confidence and have no desire to be in the spotlight.
    I belong in the audience, not on the stage.

  25. #25
    Platinum Member Teresa's Avatar
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    Brandi,
    I had to smile at your statement , " Damsel in Distress " . I don't know if you've heard of the label but I have a black , long sleeved daydress from the company " Damsel in a Dress "

    You could add to yours , Damsel in Distress but happily Damsel in a Dress !"

    Sara,
    I asked the question accepting most might give me the same answer as yours , when I first joined the forum I thought that would be the goal of most CDing members , it's been an interesting journey .

    I confess I do like OTT sometimes , there are just too many lovely clothes and shoes to ignore making a splash sometimes .
    Last edited by Teresa; 12-18-2020 at 07:59 AM.
    The real me , no going back.

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