How many of us are JUST crossdressers?

[ReineD]

Freddy, now that I've put in my two cents as a mod, I'd like to give my opinion. I'm afraid it will be rather lengthy.

There is so much misinformation in this thread I hardly know where to begin.

1. Many people in this thread have said, "I'm not TG because I'm not attracted to men". We conflate gender identity and sexuality in our culture and we need to stop doing this. They are not related, save for the fact that the majority of male identified persons are attracted to women and vice versa. Still, there are TSs and CDs who are attracted to women, TSs and CDs who are attracted to men, TSs and CDs who are attracted to both, and TSs and CDs who are attracted to neither.
   
   
2. The terms "crossdresser" and "transvestite" are interchangeable. "Crossdresser" is more commonly used in North America, and both words are used in the UK. Academic papers also use the term "transvestite" when referring to crossdressers. No matter how negatively some people may see the term "transvestite", it is not a dirty word.
   
   
3. "Transgender" according to the WPATH describes a diverse group of individuals who cross or transcend culturally defined categories of gender. And gendered presentation (not just the clothes) is one of the categories that defines gender. The gender identity of transgenders differs to widely varying degrees from the sex they were assigned at birth. Men who are not transgender have no wish to present as females unless they are genuinely doing it on a lark or for mockery. But, there are men who wear skirts and who present fully as men and I agree that these men are not transgender … unless they present this way because they do not want people pointing at them and saying, "Look, that man is trying to look like a woman". As to the men who underdress, we need to also ask if they only do so because they fear ridicule should they go further. There is a real fear among male-bodied and male-socialized individuals of appearing ridiculous and inciting scorn. Does this mean they lack the desires of crossdressers who were blessed with both a physiognomy and more favorable life circumstances that enable them to transform and pass?
   
   
4. The terms "transgender" and even "crossdresser" are widely misused:
   
   a) Now that we understand more about the components of gender than we did when the term "crossdresser" (or "transvestite) first appeared, we know that crossdressing is what a transgendered individual does.
   
   b) Some crossdressers incorrectly believe that "transgender" means "transsexual", a desire to be a woman.
   
   c) Other crossdressers believe the term "crossdresser" means dressing for sexual fetish only and they refuse to use the term for themselves.
   
   d) Some crossdressers do identify as transgender since they realize there is a difference between them and their male friends who would never even consider presenting as women.
   
   e) Level 6 transsexuals (who've had SRS) refuse to place themselves under the transgender umbrella since they see themselves physically and emotionally as women. And some post-op transwomen even refuse to call themselves TS.
   
   f) The media refers to children and adults who seek or have had Gender Reassignment as "transgender" (possibly to avoid any misunderstanding of their use of the proper term "transsexual" when it comes to children), which further complicates matters.
   
   g) Some of the transsexuals (levels 4 or 5) who do solidly identify as women but who do not see their way to having SRS (for a variety of reasons) also define themselves as "transgender", not as an umbrella term, but because they erroneously believe this is a stepping stone between "crossdresser" and "transsexual" and they feel uncomfortable using the term "transsexual" if they do not seek SRS.
   
   h) The truth is, there is a spectrum among transsexuals just as there is among crossdressers, and everyone is transgendered (save the pure sexual fetishists and perhaps the post-op, stealth transwomen but this is another discussion).
   
   h) "Transgender" is not a one way ticket (your post #36). "Transsexual" is the one way fare.

So Freddy, I have questions. You've written many times that you live in a conservative area. If you lived in San Francisco for example, and you knew that you could dress, put on a wig, forms, and not be read as a man in a dress, would you enjoy going out to lunch and being treated like a woman? Something drives you to dress, what is it and why does it offer you such joy and magic (your post #68)? And how would you feel if I went to your house, took all your clothes and makeup away, and told you that you could never express Frédérique again, not even a single earring? Do you feel as if expressing Frédérique is as much a part of you as the other crossdressers in this thread who also adamantly refuse to use the term "transgender" for themselves? Also, how do you know that your gender identity is as purely male as the men who have absolutely no desire to crossdress?

And last, to address your other points regarding a perceived hierarchy within the TG community, I also agree that the pecking order in this community only lives in small-minded people's minds. No one is better or worse than anyone else, just different. And there are countless differences.