How many of us are JUST crossdressers?

[Sara Jessica]

...She screams about how much she hates that crossdressers have it so much easier than us.

Yes, my life is infinitely easier if I were "just a crossdresser". Most importantly, my wife wouldn't have to worry every day if the bell is going to go off inside my head which could lead me headlong into transition.

Ah. But there's an end in sight for you. One day you will be transitioned, you'll have gotten past all this, and you will fit nicely as a binary woman in a binary world.

But for those of us on a middle path, there is no end in sight. Only a lifetime of balance, seeking fulfillment, and depending on one's degree of "out-ness", subterfuge (which in my case is the stealth involved to keep my children shielded from having to know about this side of me and what it takes to explain away outings, not to mention the pain-in-the-ass to simply get out the door in the first place).

However, crossdressers (depending on the degree of their need to express themselves, and depending on the acceptance of their families), face different yet just as difficult challenges. For life. We do not live in a world that accepts men who need to express femininity nor does the world accept people who experience a non-binary mixture of gender identity. Crossdressers experience the frustration of not feeling free to express themselves, and they also lose jobs and families.

I know this isn't lost upon you given this is more of a "CD" discussion but those who identify as TS also lose much when it comes to family/friends/careers. Your comment made me think which side has it worse in that department. I would suggest that the transitioning individual has more to lose based solely on the fact that they are pretty much out to everyone in the process of transition. However, I don't want to discount or trivialize the loss on the CD side. These pages are littered with such loss, mostly in spousal or dating relationships where the SO has understandable issues in accepting a gender anomaly in her gender binary world. I would not necessarily suggest that loss is more profound on either side, whether TS or CD or somewhere in-between, but from a practical standpoint, the loss should be more avoidable (or at least easier managed) on the CD side. Regardless, it's sad that loss even has to be part of the equation.