Indeed! What nearly every single person in the whole world wants more than anything, is to fit into, and be considdered a valued member of their peer group. Yes, the market responds to demand, but I'm not talking about the market, I'm talking about the marketers, and they are an entirely different thing.
A marketer's job is not to respond to the demands of the marketplace, but to create demand in the marketplace. What I'm talking about goes much, much further than unrealistic depictions of beauty (though that is a good small-scale example).
Yes it is true that throughout human history, there have been markets and salespeople, but what has not been static for most of human history is the balance of power. Since the invention of mass media, the power of marketers to bend the shape the society we live in towards maximum profitability has become progressively more and more extreme, to the point that ... I guarantee you right now there are probably 50 different processes running in the background on my phone as I type this ... recording where I am, what news I'm reading, what people I'm talking to, and what I'm saying ... all so that there is the best possible chance that I will be receptive to the next advertisement thrown at me.
You can't fight that. You might as well stand on the beach and try to beat back the waves. It is ubiquitous, and utterly pervasive.
What I am proposing is that where this marketing intersects with gender, we have essentially a billion watt amplifier that distorts existing cultural notions of gender, bending them toward the most extreme ends of the spectrum. This is done because two strategies can reliably sell just about anything in existence: insecurity and sex appeal.
I propose that this is a big aspect of why gender nonconforming behavior so often illicit knee-jerk hostility, which upon thoughtful reflection usually dissapates greatly.