The fear of GGs then, maybe is not so much centered around the physical appearance of their SO dressed up (although that hardly helps) but the psychology of their personal relationship.
So a GG can be anxious that while making love for example, she wants to know that her SO is viewing this as a heterosexual experience and that he loves her and desires her, as a heterosexual man. Instead she is thinking OMG! is he thinking to himself that he is a woman as he makes love to me? Is he thinking that when I respond to him it is because I see him as a woman? Does he think I am excited because of lesbian fantasies he thinks I have?
I can see how a GG may feel that their SO is on such a big escapism fantasy trip that he loses sight of the difference between fantasy and reality and thus loses sight that the relationship is a heterosexual one. She needs to know her SO sees the relationship the same way she does and values her for being the woman in the relationship.
