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Thread: Fantasy of crossdressing and reality

  1. #1
    Senior Member emmicd's Avatar
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    Fantasy of crossdressing and reality

    As a crossdresser I always love to wear femme clothes and dress as best I can. I have not worn a wig in several years aside from a visit at a CD studio for photos which was a one time experience.

    So I live in a fantasy world when I dress where I am the only one I have to please and I dress for my inner being. I sneak peaks at myself in all types of dresses. I love baby doll, sheath, empire line, flapper, shift (little black dress), smock and tea dress styles. I know there are more. I feel great in pretty clothes. I am a girl in my fantasies.

    In reality I am a guy in a dress but I know why I do it and I have come to understand why I do it. Reality is a way of knowing I am male but I have a female side. I am sensitive and accepting and would make a good listener. I also am good at keeping secrets because I am living a secret.

    How do other crossdressers separate fantasy and reality with their own experiences?

    Does reality hinder your crossdressing experience or do you live in the moment?

    emmi

  2. #2
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by emmicd View Post
    As a crossdresser I always love to wear femme clothes and dress as best I can. I have not worn a wig in several years aside from a visit at a CD studio for photos which was a one time experience.

    So I live in a fantasy world when I dress where I am the only one I have to please and I dress for my inner being. I sneak peaks at myself in all types of dresses. I love baby doll, sheath, empire line, flapper, shift (little black dress), smock and tea dress styles. I know there are more. I feel great in pretty clothes. I am a girl in my fantasies.

    In reality I am a guy in a dress but I know why I do it and I have come to understand why I do it. Reality is a way of knowing I am male but I have a female side. I am sensitive and accepting and would make a good listener. I also am good at keeping secrets because I am living a secret.

    How do other crossdressers separate fantasy and reality with their own experiences?

    Does reality hinder your crossdressing experience or do you live in the moment?

    emmi
    I'm not sure it's fantasy vs reality. I don't have a distinct other persona while I am dressed, I don't 'pretend' I'm 100% girl and focus on that. I'm just, well, 'me'. I don't think of myself as 'Lexi' or (real name hidden here). Yes, I wear all female clothing, but don't make any effort to feminise my behavior beyond that. I do wear heels, but don't change my walk; I guess that I walk like a guy in heels. I don't try to swing my hips or anything like that. Just like GG's do, I just behave 'normally'; the only thing I think I do differently is sit down with my legs a little closer together when I'm wearing a dress or skirt (but then again I suppose men who wear kilts do the same thing to some degree). When I'm wearing a wig, I tend to play with my hair, pretty much the same way a lot of GG's do (but then again, I love long hair on women and like to play with theirs, too). No conscious accentuating of any particular style of behavior needed. For me, it's not a 'crossdressing experience'. It feels, well, just normal.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  3. #3
    Silver Member prene's Avatar
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    emmi,
    I try not to think that much.
    I love crossdressing, love the feeling of wearing feminine clothing and have a Fantasy that I am a sensual GG.
    I do not hurt anyone or myself.
    I have a lot of fun . . . .
    No problems here.

  4. #4
    Girl, Interrupted Jennifer Cox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sometimes_miss View Post
    I'm not sure it's fantasy vs reality. I don't have a distinct other persona while I am dressed, I don't 'pretend' I'm 100% girl and focus on that. I'm just, well, 'me'. I don't think of myself as 'Lexi' or (real name hidden here). Yes, I wear all female clothing, but don't make any effort to feminise my behavior beyond that. I do wear heels, but don't change my walk; I guess that I walk like a guy in heels. I don't try to swing my hips or anything like that. Just like GG's do, I just behave 'normally'; the only thing I think I do differently is sit down with my legs a little closer together when I'm wearing a dress or skirt (but then again I suppose men who wear kilts do the same thing to some degree). When I'm wearing a wig, I tend to play with my hair, pretty much the same way a lot of GG's do (but then again, I love long hair on women and like to play with theirs, too). No conscious accentuating of any particular style of behavior needed. For me, it's not a 'crossdressing experience'. It feels, well, just normal.
    I think that explains quite well how I feel too. Although it was originally a largely sexual experience, and rarely progressed beyond lingerie, these days I just enjoy being fully dressed and doing normal things.

  5. #5
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Reality is pretty much what we make it Emmi. Once we realize that, we have pretty much taken ownership of ourselves and are in control of our own destiny.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  6. #6
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    I'm livin my fantasy!!
    Current Obsession - Breasts and Lingerie!

    .......My Photos

  7. #7
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    Simply a fantasy that I do for the fun of it. My personality doesnt really change when I am dressed. I would like to act more 'in character' when dressed but arent yet very good at some aspects of acting feminine.

  8. #8
    Silver Member Jonianne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by emmicd View Post
    .......How do other crossdressers separate fantasy and reality with their own experiences?

    Does reality hinder your crossdressing experience or do you live in the moment?

    emmi
    For me, it is very important to distinguish fantasy from reality in my life. It is very real that I am someone who enjoys wearing womens cloths sometimes and identifying with females in certain ways. It is also real that I am male and that I have important relationships with those who need me as a male in their life. (I also need me as male, as hard as that is to say.) Those relationships are more important to me than pushing the boundries of fantasy too far.

    So being a part-time crossdresser is perfect for me. I get to feel the freedom of going out completly enfemme sometimes and still maintain a strong sense of masculinity for myself and those who love me as a husband, dad, son, brother and friend.
    Joni

    "Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free" Bob Dylan

  9. #9
    Silver Member JoAnne Wheeler's Avatar
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    Fantasy ?

    If it is a fantasy, I love it = if it is real, I love it ! Like you, I always try to dress the best that I can - I only have to please myself, but it sure is nice that have your spouse tell you that you really do look nice - which my spouse has said on many occasions.

    Love,

    JoAnne Wheeler

  10. #10
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    I keep the reality of my fantasy at home where I live it out and I know I a girl inside and so dose my wife.
    Angie

  11. #11
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    My CD reality IS complete fantasy!

    I can't be female. I can't look, act, or pass for female. NOT in reality!

    But, in my CD FANTASY WORLD, I can BE any female I wish to be!

    Unlike u Emmi, I'm not sure WHY I CD! Maybe after 50 years of being a "responsible, mature adult", I needed a fun, exciting fantasy in my life?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  12. #12
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    Hi Emmi,

    I dress for the thrill of it. Not sexual but just the feeling of looking somewhat (well, almost somewhat) like the women I like to look at. Not the sexy hot ones (I do like watching them too) but he classy neatly dressed women who have that special something when you look at them. I like the full effect so use a wig, shoes and a little or a lot of makeup depending on time available. I don't think I am fantasing in general, but do sometimes specifically think about what it would be like if .....

    I try to live and most importantly enjoy the moment. I live a lot of moments, but don't always enjoy them all. Fantasy, fiction, reality or whatever. If we enjoy it, we should do it.

  13. #13
    Girl, Interrupted Jennifer Cox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Karren Hutton View Post
    I'm livin my fantasy!!
    I think you're living mine too LOL!

  14. #14
    a guy in a skirt KimberlyS's Avatar
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    just reality

    For me it is just reality. I am a guy with a mix of masculine and feminine traits. Some times I look more feminine and some times I look more masculine.

    Being a CD and making it work and integrate with the rest of my life is just reality.

    kim
    KimberlyS-CD
    joe in a skirt. Being myself not trying to be some other CDer
    Just trying to find a balance for my son and myself.

    Standard disclaimer: Going out of the house was right for me, it may or may not be right for you. If you've got no desire to leave the house, that's fine, I'm not trying to push you out the door. But for those who've been yearning to do so, I just want to let you know the world may not be as scary a place as you think.

  15. #15
    Silver Member Jilmac's Avatar
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    For 47 years I was living in a fantasy world. When I started dressing at age 15, crossdressing was a major taboo and only talked about in hushes. I grew a beard at age 26 and was a guy in a dress every time I wore anything feminine, but I still enjoyed looking at the person wearing all the pretty clothes in the mirror, but still basically in a fantasy world. About a year ago I shaved off the beard and came out to the world so now my fantasy has turned into reality. I am no longer a guy in a dress because now I can enjoy being me and expressing my feminine side in public.
    Luv and Jill


    Straight, into Fantasy Land

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member Jenniferpl's Avatar
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    My fantasy is my reality. I never thought my wife would be buying my makeup, shoes and boots, and helping me pick the right bra. To be able to wear what ever I want to bed and have a spouse that not only encourages but enjoys it. I hope my fantasy never comes to an end.

    It has been an amazing journey so far. It get only get better.

  17. #17
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    Emmi,

    I think you hit the nail on the head with your original post. It's a combination of both really, and after all, fantasy is also reality unless one is completely deluded

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer Cox View Post
    I think you're living mine too LOL!
    I think Karen is living everyone's, and more

    Woooohooooo!!!!

  19. #19
    Silver Member Teri Jean's Avatar
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    It is not a fantasy for me but a chosen life style but there are times where drab is the uniform of the day. One needs to be able to recognize that and adjust. Huggs Keli

  20. #20
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    Smile

    Quote Originally Posted by Janie Gunn View Post
    Simply a fantasy that I do for the fun of it. My personality doesnt really change when I am dressed. I would like to act more 'in character' when dressed but arent yet very good at some aspects of acting feminine.
    That pretty much goes for me too!!!

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